📖 Reading: Video Transcript: Why a Men's Ministry?

Men’s Ministry – Lecture 1

Why Have a Men’s Ministry?
Professor Steve Elzinga

Hi, my name is Steve Elzinga, and you have signed up for a class on Men’s Ministry—how to have a successful Men’s Ministry.

Now, I don’t know exactly why you signed up. Maybe you’re already part of a Men’s Ministry, and you’re hoping to learn a few things so that you can help out or take on more of a leadership role.

Maybe you were part of a Men’s Ministry in the past, and it benefited your life, your family, and everything you were trying to do. But now you’re in a new situation, and there isn’t one at the church you attend. So, you thought, I’d like to start one.

Or maybe you just want to start a Men’s Ministry that isn’t even tied to a church—something that might even lead to a church.

Or maybe you’re simply in a new place, you don’t have close male friends, and you’d like to build that kind of community.

Or perhaps you know men in your life who need something like a Men’s Ministry.

Why Have a Men’s Ministry?

In this first lecture, I want to ask and answer this question: Why have a Men’s Ministry?

1. Men Are Lonely

Psalm 102:7 says,

“I lie awake. I am like a lonely sparrow on the housetop.”

That verse has always struck me as very sad—but I think it describes many men, at least in North America.

Growing up, we often have friends because of school. Five days a week, you’re in classes, building friendships that can last through those years. I had good friends in high school, but out of 200 students, I still only keep in touch with one.

In college, I don’t hang out with anyone anymore. Same with seminary—there’s only one friend I still connect with. Friendships developed during those times because of forced proximity—you’re together day after day. But once you graduate, people scatter, and those bonds often fade.

As adults, the people you meet are usually co-workers or neighbors. And for many men, that’s it. Add to that the cultural expectation to “do your own thing,” communication struggles (especially starting new conversations), and the reality that social groups shift—something you’re part of today may be gone in two years.

There’s also the stigma around mental health. Men often don’t open up about struggles, so relationships stay surface-level.

2. Men Live in a Competitive World

Even Paul used competitive language when describing the faith:

1 Corinthians 9:26–27 says,

“I do not fight like a boxer beating the air. No, I strike a blow to my body and make it my slave, so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.”

He used competition as a metaphor because it resonated with men.

Life for men is full of competition: for a spouse, for jobs, for positions on sports teams, even for status in hobbies. At work, in school, in neighborhoods—men measure themselves against one another.

This pressure can make self-worth dependent on winning: your income, your car, your house, your vacations, even your kids’ achievements. Some men even compete over lawns: “My lawn is greener than yours.”

Competition often prevents deep friendship. If I’m always beating you, you don’t enjoy being around me. If I’m always being beaten by you, I don’t want to be near you either.

3. Emotional Suppression

Stereotypically, men are taught to suppress emotions. Don’t express how you feel, especially the negative emotions—keep them inside.

If a man is depressed, he often hides it and deals with it alone. Without honesty, we don’t really know each other. Everyone puts on a facade of strength. That makes closeness difficult.

4. Strained Relationships

Because of this competitive, suppressed atmosphere, relationships become strained—marriages, families, and friendships.

Fathers often get angry at their kids, but sometimes the real anger is at themselves: I must be failing if my child isn’t doing well. That tension carries into marriages, workplaces, and communities.

Even conversations—like political debates—can quickly escalate into arguments.

5. Lack of Role Models and Family Support

Many men also lack positive role models. Fathers may have been distant, angry, absent, or consumed by work.

In past generations, extended families lived closer—grandfathers, uncles, and older men were present to guide younger men. In many cultures outside North America, this is still true. But here, it’s often missing.

Today, with separated families, single mothers often raise boys without consistent male role models.

Even in Scripture, we see examples. Moses grew up in Pharaoh’s household, not with his own family. Later, he didn’t fully belong with his people or even in the desert community he joined. Many men feel this same sense of not belonging.

6. The Band of Brothers

Men long to be part of something greater than themselves.

Paul writes in Philippians 3:13–14,

“One thing I do: forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.”

That’s the language of purpose, mission, and striving.

When men work hand in hand toward a goal, several things happen:

• Camaraderie – shared experiences and trust.
• Loyalty – sticking together, even with weak players, because they’re part of the team.
• Unity – strength comes from the group, not the individual.
• Accountability – you push yourself harder when others are beside you.
• Discipline – practice, correction, and striving make men stronger.
• Shared Purpose – even sports teams, which don’t ultimately matter, feel important because of the mission.

Now imagine men uniting for something that does matter eternally—for the Lord. The sense of meaning and significance would be immeasurable.

7. Spiritual Emptiness vs. Eternal Purpose

Many men work hard, but they wonder: Does this matter?

If I quit my job tomorrow, what difference would it make? Is it just about money, or feeding my family? Where’s the eternal significance?

Men’s Ministry gives men a place to connect with a spiritual mission that goes beyond the daily grind. It helps them see their lives as eternally significant—what they do for Christ counts forever.

Conclusion

These are some of the reasons why Men’s Ministry is so needed—and why it’s so rewarding.

It’s not just for others. It’s also a blessing to you. If you are a man, you need a Christian band of brothers.

So, welcome aboard! I think you’re going to enjoy this class.

You may feel hesitant: Am I good enough? Can I lead something like this? Can I make it happen?

You don’t know yet—but you’re starting in the right place. You’ll learn, you’ll try some things, and you’ll see what God can do.

We’ll continue this journey in the next lesson.