📚 Reading: 20 Things Not to Do in Men’s Ministry (A Lighthearted Survival Guide)

20 Things Not to Do in Men’s Ministry (A Lighthearted Survival Guide)

Men’s ministry is full of great opportunities—but it’s also full of pitfalls. Sometimes, what you don’t do is just as important as what you do. So in the spirit of Proverbs 17:22 (“A cheerful heart is good medicine”), here’s a tongue-in-cheek list of things you should absolutely avoid if you want your men’s ministry to thrive.

1. Don’t Serve Kale at a Men’s Breakfast

Men came for bacon. You put kale on their plate? They’ll come once, but never again.

2. Don’t Announce “We’re Going to Hug Now”

Men will hug spontaneously after touchdowns, big wins, or surviving roof repairs. Forced hugging? Not happening.

3. Don’t Plan Endless Meetings About Meetings

If your men spend three hours discussing the color of the retreat T-shirts, they’ll quit and go fishing instead.

4. Don’t Assume All Men Love Golf

Yes, some men love it. Others would rather eat kale at a men’s breakfast. Offer variety.

5. Don’t Let One Guy With a Chainsaw Be in Charge of “Outdoor Fun”

Trust me. He’ll come back with fewer trees and fewer fingers.

6. Don’t Make Bible Study Questions Sound Like Therapy Sessions

“Tell us your deepest childhood wound” isn’t a great icebreaker. Try: “Who do you think would win: Samson or a modern UFC fighter?”

7. Don’t Forget Coffee

You can forget the handouts, the projector, even the speaker. Forget coffee? Game over.

8. Don’t Force Guys Into Crafts

Unless it involves welding, fire, or duct tape. Otherwise, skip it.

9. Don’t Host a Men’s Retreat Without Food

If your retreat has “quiet reflection” but no snacks, half the guys will “reflect” at the nearest burger joint.

10. Don’t Schedule Events During the Super Bowl

You’re not competing with nachos, commercials, and instant replay. Pick another weekend.

11. Don’t Use “Feelings Charts”

Men don’t want to point at the sad blue face to explain their week. Just ask them about their truck—it’ll come out eventually.

12. Don’t Plan Activities With No Purpose

If it doesn’t involve food, fire, tools, sports, or helping someone—it’s going to flop.

13. Don’t Let the Devotional Go 90 Minutes

After 20 minutes, men are checking their phones. After 40 minutes, they’re thinking about bacon. At 90? They’re gone.

14. Don’t Forget to Actually Pray

It’s easy to eat, joke, and fix stuff—but if you skip prayer, you’ve skipped the point.

15. Don’t Pretend You’re the Only Expert

If you start every session with “Let me tell you everything I know,” eventually they’ll let you. Alone.

16. Don’t Overcomplicate Simple Things

You don’t need a 40-page manual on how to flip pancakes. Trust the guy with the spatula.

17. Don’t Make the “Fun” Competitive Event Last Four Hours

An hour of softball is fun. Four hours? Pull hamstrings, pulled tempers, and pulled out of men’s ministry forever.

18. Don’t Forget Younger Men

If your group is only retirees reminiscing about “the good old days,” you’re missing the guys who need mentoring right now.

19. Don’t Forget Older Men

On the flip side, don’t run everything like it’s a CrossFit boot camp. Some men like their joints unbroken.

20. Don’t Lose Sight of Jesus

At the end of the day, bacon, softball, and duct tape are great—but if Jesus isn’t central, you’re just running a social club with better snacks.

Conclusion

Laughter aside, men’s ministry is serious kingdom work. Humor helps us see blind spots, but the heart of the matter is clear: keep Jesus at the center, prayer as your power, and transformation as the goal. And if you remember nothing else: serve bacon, not kale.

“As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” — Proverbs 27:17