📝 Worksheet 9.6: Marriage Growth, Romance Guidance, and Remarriage Referral Plan

Purpose of This Worksheet

This worksheet helps you create a simple, clear, and referral-aware plan for how your wedding officiant practice can invite couples into ongoing Christian marriage growth.

Use this worksheet to clarify:

• how you will follow up after weddings

• how you will recommend Christian Marriage Growth

• how Romance Officiant ministry may complement your practice

• how you will serve remarriage couples with wisdom

• when you will slow down or refer

• how you will keep your role clear

A faithful officiant knows when to serve, when to slow down, and when to refer.

Part 1: My Marriage Growth Purpose

Write one sentence explaining why your wedding officiant practice cares about marriage growth after the ceremony.

My wedding officiant practice encourages marriage growth because:

Sample

My wedding officiant practice encourages marriage growth because the wedding ceremony is a sacred beginning, and the bride and groom need ongoing formation in covenant faithfulness, forgiveness, prayer, communication, and Christ-centered love.

Part 2: My Post-Wedding Follow-Up Plan

When will I follow up?

Check one or write your own.

☐ Within 2–3 days after the wedding
☐ Within one week after the wedding
☐ After the marriage license responsibilities are completed
☐ Other: ________________________________________________

What will I include in the follow-up?

Check all that apply.

☐ A prayerful blessing
☐ A short congratulations message
☐ A reminder that marriage growth continues after the ceremony
☐ A recommendation for Christian Marriage Growth
☐ A local church or Soul Center invitation
☐ A reminder to seek qualified help when needed
☐ Other: ________________________________________________

Draft My Follow-Up Message

Dear [Bride] and [Groom],

With gratitude,

Part 3: Recommending Christian Marriage Growth

How will I describe Christian Marriage Growth?

Write a warm, simple sentence you could say to a couple.

Christian Marriage Growth is:

Sample

Christian Marriage Growth is a public-facing Christian Leaders Institute course that helps couples think biblically and practically about covenant love, communication, forgiveness, spiritual rhythms, and lifelong faithfulness.

When might I recommend it?

Check all that apply.

☐ During premarital preparation
☐ After the wedding ceremony
☐ In a follow-up message
☐ When a couple asks for marriage-growth help
☐ For remarriage couples
☐ For couples connected to a local church
☐ For couples connected to a Soul Center
☐ For couples not currently connected to a church
☐ Other: ________________________________________________

What will I not claim?

Complete the sentence.

I will not present Christian Marriage Growth as a substitute for:

Part 4: Romance Officiant Ministry Discernment

A Romance Officiant is not a matchmaker. Romance Officiant ministry is wisdom-based, biblically grounded, formation-oriented ministry that helps people think clearly about romance, dating, courtship, engagement, readiness, boundaries, desire, attraction, and covenant discernment.

Do I sense a possible calling toward Romance Officiant ministry?

☐ Yes
☐ Not yet
☐ I am unsure
☐ I want more training before deciding

Why might Romance Officiant ministry strengthen my wedding officiant practice?

What romance-related questions do couples in my community often face?

Check all that apply.

☐ Dating confusion
☐ Engagement readiness
☐ Sexual integrity
☐ Emotional boundaries
☐ Family pressure
☐ Remarriage discernment
☐ Blended-family concerns
☐ Attraction without covenant clarity
☐ Fear of commitment
☐ Lack of biblical marriage formation
☐ Other: ________________________________________________

My Role-Clarity Statement

Write one sentence explaining what you can offer and what you cannot offer.

As a wedding officiant, I may offer:

But I do not offer, unless separately qualified:

Part 5: Remarriage Pastoral Care Plan

Remarriage couples may bring grief, children, former spouses, divorce history, widowhood, family wounds, blended-family concerns, and covenant hopes into the wedding process.

Questions I May Ask a Remarriage Couple

Choose at least five questions you may use.

☐ What have you learned from your past relationship or loss?
☐ What does covenant faithfulness mean to you now?
☐ Are there children who need special care, patience, or conversation?
☐ Are there unresolved legal, custody, or former spouse concerns?
☐ What grief or wounds still need care?
☐ How will you build trust in the new household?
☐ What family expectations are shaping this remarriage?
☐ Who is walking with you spiritually?
☐ How will you practice forgiveness and repair?
☐ What support will help you after the wedding?

My Three Most Important Remarriage Questions

Part 6: Children and Blended-Family Sensitivity

What should I remember about children in remarriage ceremonies?

Sample Wisdom

Children should not be forced into vows, symbolic unity acts, or public promises they are not ready to make. They may be included gently through blessing, prayer, presence, or words of welcome without emotional pressure.

Phrase I Could Use

Write a gentle phrase for a couple who wants children involved in the ceremony.

Sample

“We can honor the children in the ceremony without asking them to make promises they may not be ready to make.”

Part 7: When I Should Slow Down

Check situations where it may be wise to slow the preparation process before agreeing to officiate.

☐ One person seems pressured into the marriage
☐ Children are being forced into roles they resist
☐ The couple avoids obvious conflict
☐ Former spouse conflict is dominating the process
☐ A previous divorce is not legally resolved
☐ Major financial issues are hidden
☐ There are signs of manipulation or coercive control
☐ Serious addiction concerns appear
☐ There is unresolved sexual betrayal requiring specialized care
☐ One person is isolated from family, church, or wise counsel
☐ The couple refuses to discuss serious concerns
☐ Other: ________________________________________________

My “Slow Down” Phrase

Write a phrase you could use with warmth and clarity.

Sample

“I want to serve you well, and I believe this concern deserves more attention before we move forward. Let’s pause and consider what support would help you prepare wisely.”

Part 8: Referral Plan

I will refer when there is:

Check all that apply.

☐ Abuse or threats
☐ Coercive control
☐ Domestic violence
☐ Serious addiction
☐ Severe trauma
☐ Mental-health crisis
☐ Suicidal thoughts
☐ Child safety concerns
☐ Custody conflict
☐ Unresolved legal issues
☐ Financial exploitation
☐ Sexual betrayal requiring specialized care
☐ Intense blended-family conflict beyond my training
☐ Legal questions about marriage, divorce, or custody
☐ Other: ________________________________________________

My Referral List

Write names or categories of trusted referral options.

Pastor or church leader:

Licensed counselor or marriage counselor:

Attorney or civil authority:

Domestic violence or crisis resource:

Mentor couple or marriage ministry leader:

Soul Center or local ministry support:

Part 9: My Course Recommendation Plan

Primary course I may recommend:

☐ Christian Marriage Growth
☐ Romance Officiant Skills
☐ Becoming Confident Around Women as an Organic Man
☐ Being Confident Around Men: Inspired by Biblical Women
☐ Other: ________________________________________________

My warm recommendation sentence:

My boundary sentence:

Sample Boundary Sentence

“This course may support Christian reflection and growth, but it does not replace counseling, pastoral care, legal advice, crisis support, or specialized help when needed.”

Part 10: Final Practice Commitment

Complete the following statement.

As a Christian wedding officiant, I will help couples see that the wedding ceremony is a sacred beginning. I will offer prayer, biblical encouragement, marriage-growth resources, and referral-aware pastoral care within my role. I will not overpromise, pressure, or pretend to be qualified beyond my training. With God’s help, I will serve brides and grooms with truth, grace, wisdom, and love.

Now write your own commitment in your words:

Final Reflection

1. What is one way I can help couples keep growing after the wedding?

2. What is one boundary I need to make clearer in my practice?

3. What is one referral resource I need to identify before serving more couples?

4. What is one CLI public-facing course I may recommend with humility and clarity?

5. How can my wedding officiant practice become a doorway into lifelong covenant growth without becoming pushy or unclear?