Video 7A: Helping Someone Make a Soul Growth Plan They Own

Professor Abigail Dominiak: “All right, we're continuing in the Soul Coach course, and we are talking about how to really help them make the plan. We've talked a lot about some of the skills, and we've dived into ownership and that sort of thing, but now we want to talk about, you know, how do you really help them be doers of the Word of God and not just hearers? Again, we've talked about ownership, but how do you help them create a great soul plan?”

Professor Abigail Munroe: “So, 'I need to do better' is not a plan, right? Christian growth is not behavior management. It's not self-improvement alone. It is fruitfulness in Christ. So, how do we move past 'I need to do better' or 'I need to feel better' into a goal, into a growth plan?

Professor Abigail Dominiak: Abiding does need to come first, and this is where we've talked a lot about that philosophy of abiding in Christ and in the Spirit. Apart from Him, we can do nothing.

A plan helps give structure for doing something, and questions support that follow-up. But again, the fruit and any accomplishment come from that relationship with Christ.

So, what do we mean by the FRUIT plan? It's an acronym that stands for plans that are Faithful, Rooted, User-owned, Integrated, and Trackable.”

Professor Abigail Munroe: “So first, let's start with F for Faithful. Faithful to Christ, to Scripture, and to the person's real calling before God.

Ask questions like: Does this step honor Jesus? Does it move toward love, truth, repentance, obedience, healing, or wise responsibility?

Professor Abigail Dominiak: "Yeah, and I think that's really important because you're going to have people who want to start making a plan, and if you, as a Soul Coach, start hearing a plan that in some way is not honoring to God, it's really important that you ask that question and say, 'Does this step seem like a good, loving, truthful, healing, and wise step to take right now?'”

Professor Abigail Munroe: “Next is Rooted. Rooted in prayer, Scripture, devotional engagement, and dependence on the Holy Spirit. Ask the question: Is this plan rooted in Christ or merely self-reliance?

I think when we're talking about goal setting and things related to self-improvement, it's easier to drift into that self-reliance piece. We want to make sure the plan is rooted in Christ and these biblical principles.”

Professor Abigail Dominiak: “User-owned. We've talked a lot about this. It needs to be the person being coached who owns the plan—not the coach forcing it, controlling it, or carrying it for them. Ask, 'Is this a step you're willing to own? Will you put this into action? Can you say this in your own words about how you want to carry out this plan?'”

Professor Abigail Munroe: “Integrated. The plan considers the whole person through those aspects we've been talking about. How does this connect with every area of your life? Spiritual practices, embodied life, emotions, thoughts, relationships, family story, stewardship, calling, boundaries, beauty, joy, community, or kingdom service?

You really want them to get past just the presenting issue and make sure the plan is integrated into their whole soul, like we've been discussing with the whole-person framework.”

Professor Abigail Dominiak: “And finally, Trackable. This is super important. It's so helpful when the goal is trackable. If it's something that doesn't have a concrete time frame or isn't measurable, it's much harder to follow. For example, someone might say, 'I'm going to spend fifteen minutes each morning praying about this decision that I don't know what to do about.' That's very trackable. Did you do it each morning? What did you discover during that time?

When it's trackable, it also helps you as a coach ask follow-up questions, and it helps the client recognize that they're making progress.”

Professor Abigail Munroe: “I was just going to say, I think such a powerful question is, 'What does success look like for you? What does progress look like for you?'

Before they're pursuing this goal, helping them think through those things gives them those trackable markers to look for as they move forward.

Professor Abigail Dominiak: FRUIT can also include referral. Wise planning doesn't pretend that coaching is enough. Sometimes prayer and confession may be part of the plan. You might recommend a Christian growth resource. There may be other groups or professional help involved, just as we've discussed.”

Professor Abigail Munroe: “Turning insight into a FRUIT plan is a good example.

Let's say someone says, 'I'm constantly frustrated with my wife. We keep having the same argument over and over again, and I feel like she needs to change.'

A weak goal would simply be, 'I need to fix my marriage.' But a coaching conversation might reveal that the husband feels unheard and under appreciated. He tends to withdraw when conflict arises. He hasn't clearly communicated his concerns with his wife, and he spends very little time in prayer or reflection before reacting.

So, a fruit plan, you know, the faithful piece would be pursuing reconciliation. And loving communication rather than trying to conch trying to change his wife rooted so praying before difficult conversations occur and reflecting on scriptures such as Ephesians four it's user owned because it focuses on his personal response not his wife."

Professor Abigail Dominiak: "Yeah. His question he brought up there is very like I feel like she needs to change. He was really trying to not be user own, so again, when you're coming up with this fruit plan, you know, helping again the person that you're coaching understand that needs to focus on their personal responses."

Professor Abigail Munroe: "Yeah, and then integrated, so the plan would address, you know, not only his spiritual life but his communication habits, his emotions surrounding the situation and the relationship, you know, with his wife, maybe with his family, and others who are involved, trackable, so for the next two weeks, you know, he maybe says, "I'll pause and pray before responding during conflict. I want to initiate one intentional conversation with my spouse each week, I want to journal one observation about personal reactions after disagreements, and I want to review progress with the coach at the next session, so you know, especially for this trackable thing. As a coach, it's important to be writing down, making note of this, so that in your next conversation you could say. . ." 

Professor Abigail Dominiak: “Oh, that's a great point. As a coach, you're going to want to write down as much as you can from the conversation and make yourself good reminders.

We've talked about follow-up a lot, and we're actually going to talk about it more in the next session.

You might even set reminders for yourself. Let's say someone tells you on Thursday that they're going to do XYZ. If it's appropriate, it might be a good idea to send them a quick note saying, 'Hey, praying for you before you do this.'

Make sure, as a coach, that you take really good notes, that you're really in tune with what their plan is, and how you can support them. 

Professor Abigail Munroe: and creating that accountability. Guide growth without taking over. Again, this is not just activity—it's faithful fruit.”