Video 2A: The Many Losses Inside Divorce

Hi, I am Haley Steiner, a CLI presenter.

This course is taught by Rev. Henry Reyenga and Attorney/Pastor Brian DeCook.

Welcome to Topic 2: Layered Loss, Grief Waves, and Stabilization.

When people hear the word divorce, they may think only of the legal ending of a marriage. But for the person living through it, divorce often feels like many losses arriving at the same time.

There may be the loss of companionship. The loss of a shared home. The loss of routines, holidays, family traditions, financial expectations, friendships, church belonging, confidence, and dreams about the future. Some people lose daily time with their children. Some lose connection with former in-laws or shared friends. Some lose the role they thought they would carry for the rest of their lives.

This is what we call layered loss.

Layered loss means that divorce is rarely one single grief. It is a stack of changes. One layer may be legal. Another may be emotional. Another may be spiritual. Another may be practical. Another may involve parenting, money, work, housing, or community.

Naming these losses does not mean you are weak. It means you are telling the truth.

Psalm 62:8 says, “Trust in him at all times, you people. Pour out your heart before him. God is a refuge for us.” God does not ask you to pretend. He invites you to pour out your heart.

Some participants may feel numb. Others may feel overwhelmed. Some may feel angry. Some may feel relieved and guilty about feeling relieved. Some may wonder why one small reminder can bring such a strong response. These reactions may be part of the many layers being touched at once.

In this course, we will use a simple Divorce Recovery Map:

Change. What has changed?

Loss. What has been lost or disrupted?

Meaning. What am I believing about myself, God, others, church, family, or the future?

Response. What am I doing, avoiding, fearing, or considering?

Support. Who or what is helping?

Next Step. What is one realistic and faithful action?

This map helps you slow down. Instead of trying to fix everything at once, you begin by naming what is actually happening.

Jesus says in Matthew 11:28, “Come to me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will give you rest.” That invitation is not only for people who have everything figured out. It is for the weary, the confused, the grieving, and the burdened.

This week, you are not being asked to solve your whole life. You are being invited to notice the layers, bring them honestly before God, and choose one faithful step.

Reflection question: What loss or disruption have you been carrying that others may not see?

Gentle next step: Write down three losses connected to this season, and bring them to God in a short, honest prayer.


最后修改: 2026年06月22日 星期一 08:55