📝 Worksheet 8.4: Support Network and Church-Belonging Map

Worksheet 8.4: Support Network and Church-Belonging Map

Purpose

This worksheet helps you identify the support you already have, the support you may need, and one wise next step toward healthy Christian community.

You do not need to share this worksheet with anyone unless you choose to. This is a private reflection tool for your Single Mother Growth Portfolio.

You may pause at any time. You do not need to tell your full story to build wise support.

Pause and Pray

Take a slow breath.

Place your hands open before God if that feels helpful.

Pray:

Lord Jesus, You know where I feel alone, tired, guarded, or unsure. You also know the people who can strengthen me and my children with wisdom and love. Help me rebuild support without shame and without unsafe access. Give me discernment, courage, and self-respect as I take one faithful step toward healthy belonging. Amen.

Grounding Reminder

I was not created to carry life alone.

Receiving help does not mean I am failing.

Asking wisely is not weakness.

I can receive support and still protect privacy.

I can belong in the body of Christ with honor, truth, and boundaries.

Notice and Name

Where Do I Feel Most Alone?

Check any areas that fit your current season:

I feel alone spiritually.

I feel alone emotionally.

I feel alone in parenting.

I feel alone in church.

I feel alone financially.

I feel alone with household responsibilities.

I feel alone when my children ask hard questions.

I feel alone around holidays or weekends.

I feel alone when I see two-parent families.

I feel alone when I need practical help.

I feel alone in decisions about men, dating, or boundaries.

I feel alone because I do not know who is safe to trust.

I feel alone because I am tired of explaining myself.

Something else: ______________________________

What Kind of Support Would Help Most Right Now?

Choose the three most important kinds of support you need in this season:

Prayer support.

A trusted listener.

A steady Christian friend.

A mentor or older woman of faith.

A pastor or ministry leader.

Help with church belonging.

Help with children’s ministry connection.

Help with transportation.

Help with meals.

Help with childcare.

Help with school routines.

Help with budgeting questions or referrals.

Help finding counseling or professional care.

Help finding legal, medical, or crisis resources.

Encouragement for my children.

Healthy male and female role models around my children.

A safe group where I can grow in Christ.

Someone to check in with me.

Something else: ______________________________

What Makes Asking for Help Difficult?

Check any that apply:

I do not want to be judged.

I do not want to feel needy.

I do not want people to know my private story.

I have been hurt by church people before.

I have been controlled by someone who helped me before.

I do not know who is safe.

I feel embarrassed.

I feel like I should be able to do everything myself.

I worry that people will gossip.

I worry that someone will pressure me.

I worry that help will come with expectations.

I am not sure what to ask for.

I am too tired to start.

Something else: ______________________________

My Support Network Map

Write names only if you feel comfortable. You may also use initials or descriptions, such as “neighbor,” “pastor,” “women’s group leader,” “sister,” “school contact,” or “counselor.”

Circle 1: Already Safe and Supportive

These are people who have shown trustworthiness, steadiness, kindness, and respect.

Name or description: ______________________________
Kind of support they offer: ______________________________

Name or description: ______________________________
Kind of support they offer: ______________________________

Name or description: ______________________________
Kind of support they offer: ______________________________

Circle 2: Possible Support to Explore Slowly

These are people or groups who may become helpful, but I want to move slowly and wisely.

Name or description: ______________________________
Possible support: ______________________________
Next small step: ______________________________

Name or description: ______________________________
Possible support: ______________________________
Next small step: ______________________________

Name or description: ______________________________
Possible support: ______________________________
Next small step: ______________________________

Circle 3: Church and Ministry Connections

These may include worship, children’s ministry, women’s ministry, a Soul Center, small group, pastor, chaplain, life coach minister, mentor, or trusted church friend.

Current church or ministry connection: ______________________________

One place where I feel welcomed or could begin: ______________________________

One concern I have about church belonging: ______________________________

One question I could ask a church or ministry leader: ______________________________

One way my children may need support at church: ______________________________

Circle 4: Practical and Professional Resources

These may include counseling, legal help, medical care, financial guidance, school support, childcare resources, transportation help, crisis support, or domestic-violence support if needed.

Resource or need: ______________________________
Possible contact or next step: ______________________________

Resource or need: ______________________________
Possible contact or next step: ______________________________

Resource or need: ______________________________
Possible contact or next step: ______________________________

Circle 5: Caution, Boundaries, or Distance

These are people, groups, or situations where I may need caution, limited information, clear boundaries, or distance.

Person, group, or situation: ______________________________
Why caution may be needed: ______________________________
Boundary that may help: ______________________________

Person, group, or situation: ______________________________
Why caution may be needed: ______________________________
Boundary that may help: ______________________________

Discern and Choose

Use these questions to help you think wisely before asking for help or moving closer to a person, group, or church connection.

Trustworthiness Check

Does this person respect my privacy?

Does this person listen before giving advice?

Does this person honor my children?

Does this person pressure me to share more than I want to share?

Does this person help me become more faithful, peaceful, truthful, and wise?

Does this person respect safety plans, court orders, professional guidance, and boundaries?

Does this person offer help without control?

Does this person gossip about other people’s private struggles?

Does this person treat me as a respected woman and mother in Christ?

Right Help, Right Person

What kind of help do I need?

Spiritual encouragement.

Prayer.

Practical help.

Parenting support.

Church connection.

Professional referral.

Emotional support.

Safety support.

Something else: ______________________________

Who is the right kind of person to ask for this help?

Name or description: ______________________________

What information does this person actually need?

What information can remain private?

Church-Belonging Discernment

What would healthy church belonging look like for me and my children right now?

What would make church feel safer or more welcoming?

What is one realistic church step I could take?

Attend worship.

Sit with someone trustworthy.

Ask about children’s ministry.

Meet with a ministry leader.

Join a women’s group.

Ask for prayer.

Visit a small group.

Reconnect slowly.

Try a different church environment if needed.

Take a pause from a harmful setting while seeking wise support.

Something else: ______________________________

My Specific Support Request

Write one support request that is clear, respectful, and specific.

Use this pattern:

I am working on ______________________________, and I could use help with ______________________________. Would you be willing to ______________________________?

My support request:

Before I ask, I will check:

Is this request specific?

Is this the right person?

Does this protect my privacy?

Does this support my children and my walk with Christ?

Can I receive a yes, no, or not now without shame?

One Faithful Step

This week, my one faithful step toward support and belonging will be:

Ask one trusted person for prayer.

Ask one trusted person for practical help.

Attend worship.

Ask someone to sit with me at church.

Contact a ministry leader.

Look into a women’s group.

Make a list of childcare backup options.

Ask for a professional referral.

Create a safe emergency contact list.

Invite a trustworthy friend for coffee or a short conversation.

Encourage another mother.

Set a boundary with someone unsafe or controlling.

Stop sharing private details with someone who has not been trustworthy.

Something else: ______________________________

My one faithful step is:

I will take this step by:

Date or day: ______________________________

Person or resource involved: ______________________________

Support and Safety Note

Do not ask unsafe, coercive, controlling, manipulative, or harmful people for help in ways that increase danger for you or your children.

Do not ignore court orders, safety plans, legal guidance, medical guidance, counseling guidance, or child-protection concerns in order to appear forgiving, agreeable, or spiritual.

If you or your children are facing danger, threats, abuse, stalking, coercive control, sexual harm, child safety concerns, self-harm thoughts, medical emergency, or another serious risk, seek appropriate emergency, pastoral, legal, clinical, or crisis support.

Healthy support protects truth, safety, self-respect, and wise next steps.

Portfolio Summary

Complete these sentences for your private Single Mother Growth Portfolio.

One kind of support I need most right now is:

One person or group that may be safe support is:

One boundary I need in community is:

One church-belonging step I can take is:

One prayer I am bringing to Christ is:

Closing Prayer

Lord Jesus, thank You that I am not alone in Your body. Help me receive support without shame and offer love without losing wisdom. Lead me to trustworthy people who will honor You, respect my children, and strengthen my next faithful steps. Protect me from unsafe help, controlling relationships, and pressure to share what should remain private. Teach me to walk with courage, self-respect, and hope as I rebuild support and belonging. Amen.