People Smart for Ministry: Reading: Ministers Who Invite Attack (Video Slides)

Ministers Who Invite Attack

Henry Reyenga

Look At Ourselves First

There are some ministers, although a small percentage of the total, who are disturbed by various pathological conditions within themselves that go untreated and invite criticism and attack. A pathological minister is one who has one or more mental, emotional, or relational problems, which severely aggravate members of the congregation.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (p. 127). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Some ministers do have serious personality problems that go undetected at first but become obvious as time passes. At first the problems are subtle and elusive. But in time, congregants begin to notice one or more of the following: excessive anger in the pulpit, a deeply depressive demeanor, extreme self-centeredness, unusual perfectionistic tendencies, abnormal attention seeking, an overly controlling attitude, an overly critical or judgmental stance regarding the behavior of others, or comments revealing high levels of anxiety. Simply put, the minister does not seem to practice what he preaches, or at least what he should be preaching.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (pp. 127-128). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Pastors Who Bring Harm

When the minister cannot seem to get along with competent and spiritually minded staff persons, when he must attend and control every committee meeting of the church, when he frowns more than he smiles, when he complains more than he inspires, when his spouse appears beaten down and depressed (maybe even stops attending church), when he must be center stage at all church meetings, when he is known for his angry outbursts, then the people of the church are going to be critical of him, and understandably so.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (p. 128). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Mentally Ill?

Are these ministers mentally ill? Certainly some are mentally ill, but others might be better described as "dysfunctional,” that is, they have one or more mental, emotional, or relational disorders that severely interfere with their ministry effectiveness.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (p. 130). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Neurosis

Even though the term neurosis is somewhat outmoded today in psychological literature, it still conveys the idea of abnormal or outside the bounds of average. It suggests that unusual fears or anxieties prevail in the mind of the neurotic person. Even though there are certain cultural factors influencing our understanding of neurosis (for example, in some cultures, males are taught to believe that a woman during her menstrual period may have an evil influence on others and should be avoided),[2] the term does suggest an abnormal cluster of fears adversely influencing one's interpersonal relationships as well as one's sense of personal well-being.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (p. 130). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Anger

Anger is a normal and natural human emotion. It is one aspect of the emotional armory with which God has made humans. We have been endowed with reason, volition, and emotions that enable us to survive. All of the emotions have a positive function, but if any of them is allowed to get out of control, much harm can be done to both self and others. This is especially true of anger.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (p. 132). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Narcissistic

The narcissistic personality disorder is one often seen among ministers. Knowledgeable and mentally balanced laypersons are quickly turned off by a narcissistic minister. Arrogant, self-centered, attention seeking, power hungry, pushy, dogmatic, bloated with self-importance, exploitative, manipulative, and insensitive, these ministers invite a lot of justifiable criticism.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (p. 134). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Characteristics of Narcissism (DSMIV)

1. A grandiose sense of self-importance (person exaggerates his own ability and accomplishments).

2. Preoccupation with fantasies of beauty, brilliance, ideal love, power, or limitless success.

3. Belief that personal uniqueness renders the person fit only for association with (or understanding by) people or institutions of rarefied status.

4. Need for excessive admiration.

5. A sense of entitlement (person unreasonably expects favorable treatment or automatic granting of his wishes).

6. Exploitation of others to achieve personal goals.

7. Lack of empathy (person does not recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others).

8. Frequent envy of others or belief that others envy him.

9. Arrogance or haughtiness in attitude or behavior.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (p. 134). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

The Overly Emotional and Attention-Seeking Minister (DSMIV)

Ministers who must always be center stage and are very jealous if others supplant them in the life of the church would also fit here.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (p. 136). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

1. Discomfort with situations in which the person is not the center of attention.

2. Relationships that are frequently fraught with inappropriately seductive or sexually provocative behavior.

3. Expression of emotion that is shallow and rapidly shifting.

4. Frequent focusing of attention on self through use of physical appearance.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (p. 136). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

5. Speech that is vague and lacks detail.

6. Overly dramatic expression of emotion.

7. Easy suggestibility ([person] is readily influenced by opinions of other people or by circumstances).

8. Belief that relationships are more intimate than they really are.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (p. 136). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Issues to Address

Poor or inadequate socialization.

Socialization is the process of becoming a functioning human being, most of which takes place in the context of the person's family environment. Some pathological ministers experienced poor or inadequate socialization. For example, they may have learned more about competition or conflict than they did cooperation in family interaction. Or they may have learned to use anger as the best method to get their way. Poor social skills learned in childhood will probably result in all kinds of conflict in the adult years.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (p. 142). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Issues to Address

Abuse in childhood.

Related to the above, when a child has been severely abused during his early developmental years, he is more likely to become an abusing adult. Ministers who were abused in childhood often become bullies, tyrants, even sadistic adults. They may hold a core belief that says, I was hurt by others as a child; now I will get my revenge and hurt others. The childhood abuse may have been physical, sexual, emotional, verbal, or neglect.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (p. 142). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Issues to Address

Unresolved anger.

Humans can learn an angry lifestyle quite early in life. Being a defense mechanism, anger may be a response to any perceived threat. If a minister often observed his father abuse his mother physically or otherwise, he may as an adult choose to be verbally abusive to men in his church who remind him of his father. That is, he projects onto others what he continues to feel about his father.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (pp. 142-143). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Issues to Address

Deep-seated insecurities. (1)

Fearful feelings out of one's past may continue to haunt one's present and future. Deeply rooted insecurities out of one's childhood may cause one to respond to stressful situations in ways that are counterproductive. Present circumstances may turn on these old "tapes” of insecurity and result in either fight or flight. Insecure ministers do not usually stay with any church for very long. They have a core belief that says, If life gets rough, you run.

Issues to Address

Deep-seated insecurities. (2)

Another possible core belief might be: If someone disagrees with you, you redefine that person as an enemy. This can create serious problems for a minister in a church where some people are bound to disagree with him at times. Also, since insecurity is a form of fear, these fears may become the fuel that feeds inappropriate outbursts of anger.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (p. 143). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Issues to Address

Conditional love.

These people are love-starved because of their being conditionally loved in their early childhood home. This type of background can create all kinds of relational problems in adulthood. Some such ministers enter the ministry expecting the church to be that family that will love them unconditionally. If that doesn't happen, discouragement, anger, and depression will likely follow. Quite often a pathological minister is a discouraged minister.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (p. 143). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Issues to Address

Over-controlled childhood.

Some pathological ministers were raised in a home with one or both parents who were over-controlling. A domineering mother is usually the culprit.[14] Such parenting tends to rob a child of two very necessary ingredients for maturity and stability: freedom and taking responsibility for oneself. Under these circumstances deep-seated resentment may develop that persists into adulthood and can spill over into a minister's behavior in a variety of pathological ways.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (pp. 143-144). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Issues to Address

Alcoholic or drug-addicted parents.

Pathological ministers often reveal that they had alcoholic or drug-addicted parents (one or both) when growing up. The damaging effects of such a family life are widely observed in clinical practice. The fear, insecurity, anger, and continued resentment felt by these children continues long into adulthood.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (p. 144). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Issues to Address

Chronic physical and medical problems.

Some pathological ministers may be struggling with chronic physical or medical problems that may have never been detected or diagnosed by a physician. (ADD or ADHD, Bi-polar)

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (p. 144). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Issues to Address

Burnout. (1)

Brooks Faulkner has given us the best discussion of the problem of burnout for ministers in his book Burnout in Ministry. Burnout is physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual exhaustion that results from a human being trying to be Superman in his or her vocation. Burnout could be called career exhaustion that results from failing to recognize the limitations of one's humanity.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (p. 144). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

ssues to Address

Burnout. (2)

Oftentimes ministers experiencing burnout will behave in ways that turn people against them. Just as a misbehaving child is a discouraged child, so a burned-out minister can be a mis-behaving minister who does things that cause his people to criticize him. Sometimes, burnout is an expression of clinical depression.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (pp. 144-145). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Ministering to and Healing for the Pathological Minister

I suggest a fourfold strategy for ministering to and healing for the pathological minister. There must be awareness, diagnosis, therapy, and encouragement and protection.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (p. 146). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Awareness (1)

Awareness: Pathological ministers must know they have a major problem that needs immediate treatment. If you have recognized yourself somewhere in this chapter, it was not written to condemn you but to help you. The tragedy of most pathological ministers is that they do not believe they have a problem of any sort. They practice denial to the utmost. Their problems, they think, are caused by others, whom they are quick to blame.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (p. 146). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition. .

Awareness (2)

However, if you are hurting, remember that pain, even emotional and relational pain, is symptomatic of some deeper problem. Treating only the symptoms, for example, getting rid of a staff member or maneuvering critical lay leader out of office, will not solve the problem in the long run, if the problem is resident in you. Awareness of the minister's problem by both lay leaders and the minister is the beginning step toward solution of conflict issues and the resulting criticism.

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (p. 146). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Diagnosis (1)

Professional help is usually needed to diagnose the nature of a minister's suspected pathology. Such help could come from a clinically trained pastoral counselor, a psychiatrist who is sympathetic to religion in general and church life in particular, a clinical psychologist who has empathy for ministers, or even an experienced older minister who has considerable wisdom from working with troubled ministers over the years (and who is knowledgeable concerning professional referral resources).

Greenfield, Guy (2001-07-01). Wounded Minister, The: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks (p. 146). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Diagnosis (2)

There are several psychological tests available from many therapists that a minister could take to assist in diagnosis. Two that are widely used are the Minnesota Multiphasic Personality Inventory (MMPI) and the Basic Personality Inventory (BPI). Either of these can be administered by most licensed professional counselors. Both tests are highly respected by professionals and have proved to be helpful in identifying pathological conditions in one's personality.