Chapter 7

 Reaching Out Beyond Ourselves

The primary focus of each small group and house church should be outreach and discipleship, rather than fellowship. Fellowship, then, will be a healthy by-product of the small group that is constantly reaching out to others.

There will be much prayer and interaction within the group to meet needs and form relationships, but the top priority must always be to bring in those who have not yet decided to believe in Christ. This causes the group to mature and multiply or reproduce another small group. It gives more believers the opportunity to use the gifts the Lord has given to them to reach pre-Christians and make disciples.

We are called to trust Him. The greatest catalyst that I know of to grow in Christ and to not be self-consumed is to get our eyes off of ourselves and instead look to Jesus and to the needs of those around us. A group of people who are always looking inward and are content to have the status quo will never grow and multiply. Looking inward prevents growth, like an ingrown toenail, and usually causes pain, competition, and stagnation.

When groups are content to stay the same, without knowing it, they build a wall around themselves, causing others to feel they are not welcome. The group having a heart to reach out to others is willing to change, enjoying wonderful fellowship in the process.

When I was newly married and a young missionary, I heard a man of God quote C.T. Studd, the famous missionary: "I do not wish to live 'neath sound of church or chapel bell; I want to run a rescue shop within a yard of hell.” These words were life changing for me.

The main purpose for every small group and house church must be to run a rescue shop within a yard of hell. Otherwise, the group becomes a social club without any power. The Lord gives us power to be witnesses, not to sit around and enjoy nice, comfortable "bless-me” meetings.

But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be My witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth (Acts 1:8).

The church is not primarily a hospital; it is an army. Although armies do have medical units, they are for the purpose of getting the soldiers healed so they can get out on the battlefield and destroy the enemy. The focus is not the medical unit. The focus is on the battle and in winning the war. We are in a spiritual war! We do not have time to sit around and play church like children play war games. We need to rise up in faith and be the Church and destroy the works of darkness in Jesus' name!

When I was a young man, our nation was in the midst of the Vietnam War. Every year, Bob Hope would take an entourage to Vietnam to entertain the soldiers. Now let's face the facts. No one joined the army to go to Vietnam to see Bob Hope. They went to Vietnam to fight a war! However, while they were there they had the fringe benefit of being entertained by Bob Hope and his company.

Although the primary purpose of the small group and house church is to reach pre-Christians and disciple new believers, we also experience the fringe benefit of tremendous fellowship and relationships with people who care about us. They stand with us as we face hardships and struggles.

There will be many different creative approaches to reaching pre-Christians and making disciples as we work together in a small group or house church setting; however, the primary vision must be clear and fixed. We are called to fulfill the Great Commission. We don't necessarily fulfill the Great Commission by having an evangelistic teaching at every meeting or think that we must go out on the street to evangelize pre-Christians each week. The main focus of our vision must be to seek the Lord for ways to reach those who do not know Christ and make disciples.

One small group I was a part of printed up an attractive flyer with a big photo of our smiling group. One summer we canvassed our neighborhood by handing out the flyer to those who were newcomers to the community, along with a small house plant. We welcomed the new families to the neighborhood and invited them to our small group.

Some youth cells have used clowning as a regular outreach ministry for their group. Dressed as clowns, they go to parks, visit the elderly, and generally spread cheer and the Good News of Jesus wherever they go as they hand out balloons and do short skits.

Picnic evangelism is an informal way to reach family and friends with the message that God loves us and sent His Son so we can find forgiveness and new life through Him. Small group and house church members take the initiative to invite friends and relatives, who have not made a decision to follow Christ, to a picnic including free food, games, and entertain-ment. Sharing Christ at picnics is a big hit with some DOVE Kenya small groups in Nairobi; with its warm climate, picnics are possible throughout most of the year. Through the outreach of these family-oriented picnics, relationships are built and people come to faith in Christ.

When small groups and house churches have evangelism as an integral part of their focus, God often brings nonbelievers right into their group settings. Wendy befriended Susi, an atheist East German exchange student at her school. She invited Susi along to her small group, and over the next several months, Susi soaked in God's Word and asked many challenging questions of her new-found friends. It was an exciting day for the entire group when Susi announced she had made Jesus the Lord of her life and wanted to be baptized.

When individuals in small groups and house churches challenge each other to reach beyond themselves to make disciples, they will discover that God will give them many creative opportunities. Even if no one immediately comes to Christ through these opportunities, there is a spiritual dynamic released in the group that keeps our focus on the harvest fields instead of on ourselves. As we continue to sow, we will eventually reap.

The Oikos Principle

During the early 1980s, a group from our church took a trip to Seoul, Korea, to visit one of the largest churches in the world, Yoido Full Gospel Church. One of the principles that we learned during our time there was the "oikos principle.”

What is an oikos? Oikos is the Greek word for household or house of people. Your oikos is that group of people with whom you relate on a regular basis. Every believer should apply the oikos principle to their lives as a way of infiltrating their spheres of influence with the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

Acts 10:2 speaks of Cornelius and all of his family (oikos). He and all his family were devout and God-fearing; he gave generously to those in need and prayed to God regularly.

. . . Cornelius was expecting them and had called together his relatives and close friends [his oikos] (Acts 10:24).

Paul and Silas were in prison. In the midst of an earthquake the jailer became receptive to the Gospel. He invited his household to listen to Paul's message, and they were all made acceptable to God through faith in Christ. This group of people was his oikos.

The oikos principle is a strategy of using our existing relationships to evangelize and to make disciples.

Groups of People Who Are a Part of Your Oikos:

Family and relatives. Your Uncle Jack and Aunt Judy and cousin Ted are all part of your oikos, even if they live far away. If you maintain regular contact with them, they are part of your oikos.

Those who have common interests with you. Those who play tennis with you are part of your oikos. Anyone you share a common interest with, such as an interest in computers, sewing, playing basketball, playing the guitar--these people are a part of your oikos.

Those who live in the same geographical location as you. Your neighbors are a part of your oikos.

Those who have a common vocation. Those whom you work with--your fellow employees--are a part of your oikos. If you are a construction worker, your oikos includes other construction workers. If you are a doctor, other professional people that you would relate with would be included in your oikos.

Others with whom you have regular contact.These people may include your dentist, family doctor, mechanic, hairdresser, sales people, school officials, etc.

Those people in your oikos group will be much more receptive to the Gospel in God's timing because they trust you--you have built a relationship with them.

Sometimes Christians discover they have only other believers in their oikos. When this is the case, steps need to be taken to develop new circles of relationships. Some believers join soccer teams, neighborhood organizations, and other community groups to bring increase to their oikos.

More than forty years ago, when my wife LaVerne and I and a group of young people began to play baseball, basketball, and other sports with youth in our local community, we built relationships with them and they became a part of our oikos. Because we established friendships with them on their turf, we could readily discuss the Good News of Jesus. Our oikos is part of God's strategy to reach the world.

One day, Jesus ministered to a man who was demon possessed. After he was delivered, the man begged Jesus for permission to follow Him. However, Jesus said:

"Return home and tell how much God has done for you.” So the man went away and told all over town how much Jesus had done for him (Luke 8:39).

Jesus sent him home to his oikos!

When Levi invited Jesus to his home for dinner, he invited his oikos members (see Luke 5:27-32). Zacchaeus had Jesus come to his home, and his whole household accepted Christ. This was his oikos (see Luke 19:9). Andrew asked Simon to come and get to know Jesus. Simon was Andrew's oikos member (see John 1:40-42). Philip asked Nathaniel to come and get to know Jesus. Nathaniel was Philip's oikos member (see John 1:44-45).

Small group and house church members have many everyday oikos opportunities. Ryan served as a small group leader at a DOVE church until he and his family moved to another state where they continued to be involved in small group ministry. Ryan relates this story from a few years back. He was at the drive-in movies when God used him:

"It was just another Saturday night when my wife and I took my young cousin to a Disney movie at the drive-in,” said Ryan. "We parked our very used Toyota with Jesus stickers plastered all over the back window, and I stepped out of the car to go to the snack bar. A guy named Jon stopped me and asked if I was a Christian, and then proceeded to tell me his story of a life lived in disobedience to God. I told him how Jesus changed my life and that before I knew God, I was hurting and longing for real purpose. I explained how I had tried to find fulfillment in sports and later had joined the U.S. Marine Corps in hopes that being successful there would bring me a sense of accomplishment. That night, Jon knelt right beside that snack bar at the drive-in and made Jesus the Lord of his life.

"The next week my wife and I, with my little cousin, returned to the drive-in and parked the car. This time, before I could even get out of the car, a woman I had never seen before came to the car and asked if I was the person who had prayed with Jon. She asked me to come to her car to meet Jon's mom. (Notice the expanding oikos!) This precious lady, who had been an alcoholic for years, asked Jesus into her life that night and was set free!”

Bob's story is another one that illustrates how an entire family oikos was impacted with the Good News of Christ. After Bob and his wife found new life and stability in Christ, Bob was burdened for his parents, brothers, and sisters who were far from God. Bob, along with his home group, prayed that God would allow him to contact his father, with whom the family had lost touch. Although the situation seemed hopeless, through a series of miracles Bob reached his dad, along with other family members on a trip that crisscrossed the United States. His dad was living with Bob's half-sister, and they both received Jesus into their lives. Bob and his sister traveled to another state to explain the message of the hope Jesus offers with her brother, and he and his wife made a decision to follow Christ. Continuing on to yet another state, Bob contacted his mother, and she responded immediately, "I want to accept Jesus.” It helped that Bob's oldest brother had accepted the Lord a few days earlier. Looking back on it, Bob is sure that the Spirit of God moved so freely in response to the many prayers of the believers praying for Bob's "miracle missionary outreach” to his family oikos.

The oikos strategy is the most natural way of fulfilling the Great Commission. Nearly every Christian has at least twenty people in his or her oikos. These twenty people plus their oikos gives the potential of 400 contacts (20x20). People want the Truth! They are waiting for real Christians whom they can trust to give them the Truth (Jesus).

You may want to write a list of people in your oikos. Pray and ask God to show you two or three of the people whom you're most concerned about and begin to pray for these people and reach out to them. If they are pre-Christians, you will be involved in evangelism. If they are struggling in their Christian lives, God may call you to be involved in discipleship. Either way, you are called to pray for them.

One time a small group leader in one of the DOVE churches received a phone call from someone in his group. "Do you have any holy water?” he was asked. The small group leader did not grow up in a Roman Catholic tradition and was not expecting this type of request; however, he wanted to meet this woman where she was at, so he asked her for further details.

She explained her concern for her daughter and her boyfriend. Strange things were happening in their home. An object had jumped off the stove, and other unexplainable supernatural things were happening in their house. "Could I come over to your daughter and her boyfriend's home to pray?” he asked her.

"Oh yes!” she exclaimed. "And I want to be there when you come.” The small group leader and his wife went over to their home to pray. After a time of sharing the Word of God, the young man received Jesus Christ as Lord. His girlfriend also expressed a desire to obey the Lord, and they were married a short time later. They started serving in a small group and were discipled and trained to lead others to Jesus.

Another small group leader discussed his faith in Christ with a salesman who came into his place of business. Later the salesman received the Lord and got involved with believers in a group in his local area. The small group began to pray for the salesman's mother, who had not yet accepted Christ. She received the Lord a few weeks before she passed away. Small groups and house churches that understand the oikos principle do not have a hard time focusing their attention on those who do not yet follow Christ. It becomes a very natural way to fulfill the Great Commission.

Some small groups and house churches use the Alpha Course, a ten-week course that explores some of the basic truths of the Christian faith. Alpha originated at an Anglican church, Holy Trinity Brompton, in London in the 1970s and is used widely across all denominations as a way to invite friends who are not believers in Christ to learn the basics of the Bible. Other small groups and house churches ask the Lord to lead them to a man or woman of peace in their community whose heart is being prepared by the Holy Spirit to give their life to Christ (see Luke 10). These men or women of peace are people of influence, who when they give their lives to Christ, influence many others within their oikos to give their lives to Christ.

Show Hospitality

Our homes are centers for ministry. In both house church and small group settings, homes often are the places where "pre-Christians” feel most comfortable. They can see that we are real people as we sit around the table eating ice cream or playing games. Being open and friendly as we share the things the Lord has given us creates an atmosphere where people feel relaxed; we can readily share the love of Jesus in personal and practical ways. The Bible gives this important advice on sharing what we have:

Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms (1 Peter 4:9-10).

"Hospitality” is cheerfully sharing food, shelter, or spiritual refreshment to those whom God brings into your life. It is using your home and the material things God has given you as a means to serve others and build relationships. And it's fun!

There is a difference between entertaining and showing hospitality. Entertaining often emphasizes having a nice "party” or meal, while hospitality focuses on the needs of those who have come into our homes. When serving through hospitality, we should not hesitate to invite people to our home because of a lack of sumptuous or prepared food. Why not keep a few snacks or cans of soup on hand just in case? The truth is--hospitality doesn't always have to include food.

We should not be anxious about a little dirt or dust. A genuine, warm welcome will bless people a whole lot more than sweeping the floor before they come. We should be much more concerned about fellowship than about our home being spotless or having an elaborate meal. All too often, concentrating too much on elegance can actually become a hindrance to fellowship. Some of the best times of hospitality are those times when a plate of fruit, hot dogs, ice cream, or canned soup is shared as people get to know one another.

Jesus reprimanded Martha, after He came into her home, for being so overwhelmed with all her preparations. She became more concerned about serving than about the One she served. Mary, on the other hand, sought the important thing--fellowship with her Guest (see Luke 10:38-42).

If God has given you the grace to serve big meals when people come to your home and you love doing it--that's great. If you become anxious, like Martha, it is a warning light for you to reevaluate. Remember, it's not the food that's important but the fellowship! The Holy Spirit builds relationships as we spend time with people in our oikos.

Invite Those Who Cannot Invite You Back

Then Jesus said to His host:

When you give a luncheon or dinner, do not invite your friends, your brothers or relatives, or your rich neighbors; if you do, they may invite you back and so you will be repaid. But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, and you will be blessed. Although they cannot repay you, you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous (Luke 14:12-14).

God is especially honored when we invite those into our homes who cannot invite us back. A young man told a small group leader, "The first time I came into your home, I sensed the presence of God.” Another told him, "The reason people love to come into your home is because they sense the peace of God.” We must realize that the Lord's presence is in our homes. Expect people to sense the presence of the Lord in your home.

Open the door of your home to those who have needs. Romans 12:13 tells us to share with God's people who are in need and to practice hospitality. God is calling us to practical hospitality, expecting nothing in return. It is a commandment, not an option.

Practical Suggestions for Hospitality

When Hospitality Includes a Meal:

•Keep food on hand that can be made quickly.

•If married, the spouse should help prepare and clean up afterward.

•Singles, if your parents or roommates are uncomfortable with your inviting friends to your home when they are present, use your home when they are away, or go to a restaurant.

•Pray with people in your home. A great time to start is before mealtime. (Remember, those who were walking on the road to Emmaus had their spiritual eyes opened as Jesus blessed the food.)

Other Suggestions for Hospitality:

•Help guests to relax. Give them a drink or a snack so they have something to hold in their hands to keep them from feeling uncomfortable. If they are pre-Christians or Christians and smoke, be willing to provide an ashtray.

•Be open to the leading of the Holy Spirit to pray for or with them.

•Use tools such as tracts, books, CDs, DVDs, music,pictures, and wall plaques to help you in discussing spiritual things. The booklet entitled What Does it Mean to Be a Real Christian?¹ is an excellent tool to use to lead someone into a personal relationship with Jesus.

Called to the Nations

Another way that small groups and house churches can reach out beyond themselves is by adopting a missionary or a church leader from a church in another part of the world. We sometimes call this "embracing our missionaries.”² Jesus instructed us to remember that His house is a "house of prayer for all nations” (Mark 11:17). The Lord's heart is in missions. Each small group and house church needs to have its heart in the same place--in the mission fields of the world.

Small groups and house churches that embrace a missionary or a church leader or church in another part of the world will send notes of encouragement to the missionary or foreign church leader. If they are embracing a missionary, they will pray for the missionary and become a practical link between the missionary and the local church. When the missionary comes home on furlough, the small group helps to serve the missionary in practical ways: housing, meals, travel, and fellowship. One small group that I am aware of has sent a former member to a foreign nation. This group will stay extra late at times in order to use the Internet to contact their former small group member who is in a time zone that is eight hours ahead. Even though it's 6:00 a.m. in his nation, he anxiously anticipates these times of communication and encouragement.

We encourage small groups and house churches to adopt a church leader from another nation. Since DOVE has a mandate from the Lord to be involved in church planting in the nations of the world, members have the opportunity to reach out to believers in other nations who are a part of the same "spiritual family.” The Lord has built beautiful relationships between believers in various nations of the world who are involved in these "partner churches.”

Each of our international churches in the continents of the world has a vision to multiply and send out laborers to the nations. We believe that new wineskins must be formed in the nations of the world to contain and train new believers during the spiritual awakening that the Lord is sending on the earth! I have been so encouraged when spending time with the believers in DOVE Kenya and hearing their vision to reach the nations in the continent of Africa and beyond with the Good News of Jesus. They are already involved in planting churches in Uganda, Rwanda, and India. Sitting with the DOVE Scotland leadership and hearing them talk about the vision the Lord has given them to see churches birthed from outside of their nation has been thrilling. And believers in DOVE Christian Fellowship-New Zealand, Canada, Bulgaria, the Netherlands, the Caribbean, and Latin America now have a vision for church planting in nations outside of their own.

Those who lead these international churches are national leaders whom the Lord has raised up during the past few years. It's a joy to work with these Christian leaders as we labor together in preparing "new wineskins” to preserve the harvest that the Lord is bringing into His Kingdom.

Reaching International Students

One area where small groups and house churches can have a great impact on world missions is in international student ministry. To date, some 500,000 international students study in the United States. This is roughly three-fourths of the entire international student population worldwide. They generally comprise the academic top 5 to 10 percent of their young people, and many come from nations closed to traditional Western missionary activity. Furthermore, many universities are now actively recruiting internationals to come and study at their institutions, all the way from top Ivy League schools to community colleges.

This is a tremendous opportunity for hospitality evangelism. When Paul laid out the qualifications for elders to Titus, he mentioned "hospitality” as one of the required characteristics (Titus 1:8). The Greek word used here for hospitality is philoxenos, "to love the foreigner.” It is interesting to note that Paul defines hospitality as that which we do for strangers, not our friends and families.

Through holiday picnics, weekend and semester break housing, recreational activities, and invitations to celebrate our religious holidays with us, small groups and house churches can build a circle of friends that can reach the international student with the Good News of Jesus Christ. According to surveys, the one thing international students who are living in America want most after an American degree is an American friend. Reaching them at this crucial time when they are confronted with relativism and secularism on their campuses can make an impact not only on their own lives, but perhaps even the destiny of a nation.

For most internationals, their North American degrees will be tickets to positions of relative influence and power in their nations. Sharing the Good News about Jesus with them can have a rippling effect far beyond their own personal lives. Their contact with Christianity could cause them to look with favor on missions efforts in their own countries and the national churches there. They will most likely have significant influence in their professional sphere and could even receive a call from the Lord to evangelize their own nation. All it takes is a willingness to give of our time and love, a determination to overcome social and cultural barriers, and the boldness to share the Good News of Jesus with the international student when the time is appropriate.³

God has called us to use the small groups and house churches as new vessels for the harvest. They are tools for making disciples, beginning in our local area and then reaching out to the nations. Every ministry within DOVE assists in the building of these "underground churches”--the small groups and house churches. For example, one of the purposes of our mission ministry, DOVE Mission International, is to help every believer in every small group and house church experience the blessing of teaming with others to reach the nations. Our publication company provides resources for small group and house church ministry.

An exciting, modern-day example of an underground church experiencing a great revival and making many new disciples took place in Ethiopia. In 1982 half of all the evangelical churches in Ethiopia were closed due to harassment, legal banning, and persecution. The Meserete Kristos Church fell under a complete ban. All of their church buildings were seized and used for other purposes. Several of their prominent leaders were imprisoned for years without trial or accusation.

The church membership at that time was approximately 5,000 believers. The fires of persecution got hotter and hotter each year, forcing them to go underground and meet in clandestine home groups. Nearly a decade later, the Marxist government fell. The same government leaders who closed the doors of the church buildings a few years before led the procession of God's people back into the buildings. However, the Church had grown "underground” from 5,000 to over 50,000 people!

During persecution, these believers met from house to house in small groups. Hundreds of believers began to get involved in the work of ministry in these groups. They no longer were focusing on the church building or the programs of the church. Their time together was spent in prayer, reaching those who have not yet determined to follow Christ, and making disciples.

In my study of church history, over and over again before any great move of the Holy Spirit, there were small groups of dedicated people who prayed and searched the Scriptures. The great revivals and outpourings of the Holy Spirit are usually traced to these seemingly insignificant gatherings of a few fervent intercessors.

Is it going to take persecution for us to experience this same kind of revival? Focusing on Jesus and the church meeting in small groups and house churches takes our emphasis off of meetings and programs. We can focus on Jesus and on the Great Commission. Is it possible that sometimes we are so busy going to church meetings that we do not have time to be true Christ followers and examples to the unevangelized? Small groups and house churches provide the atmosphere for believers to learn practical Christian living in an everyday setting.

In the next chapters we will look at leadership within small groups. How should a person lead? Jesus modeled for us how we should conduct ourselves. He took on the role of a servant and led through serving those around Him. That is the mark of a true leader.

Questions for Practical Application

1.Explain how "outreach” should be the primary focus of a small group or house church.

2.If a small group or house church loses sight of outreach, what then is the natural tendency of that group?

3.Make a list of persons that you presently have in your oikos. Prayerfully choose two or three of them to focus on for this next season of time.

Chapter 7

1. Larry Kreider, What Does It Mean to Be a Real Christian? (Lititz, PA: House to House Publications, 2007). www.h2hp.com

2. Some of the insights about "embracing our missionaries” are from Terry Pfautz, former mission director of DOVE International.

3. This section was written by Mel Sensenig, director of a former international student ministry of DOVE International.