Transcript: Lesson 13 - The Story of Redemption Part 1

Welcome, friends, we are thinking about God's story and our sexuality. Throughout the course, we have been reflecting on the different stories that we find embodied in our broader culture.  And reflecting on the biblical story in trying to understand the biblical story more deeply so  that we can see how our individual stories of marriage or singleness, really the story of our  sexuality, is meant to point to the Gospel story of Jesus and help those around us better  understand the nature of God's love for us God's faithfulness, and care for us. As we head into this next unit, and think about the story of redemption, I want to emphasize the fact that part  of what the gospel does is it helps each of us see that we are sinners in need of Jesus. And I  want to be clear, especially when we think about our sexuality, and how sin affects our  sexuality, that each and every person is affected by sin. Now, I say this, because oftentimes, I think there has been the tendency, even within Christian circles, maybe especially within  Christian circles, to single out maybe specific sexual sins, specific examples of sexual  brokenness, and say, Well, this kind of sexual brokenness, this kind of sexual sin is, is worse  than the sexual sin that I struggle with this, the sexual brokenness that shows up in in my life. And so I think we have to be really clear that part of what the gospel does is it communicates  to us that we are all in need of a Savior, all of us are sexual sinners, all of us are sexually  broken, standing in need of Jesus. Now part of what you see in the Gospel, and when we think about the story of redemption, one thing that I'm amazed by, is Jesus's grace and love and  compassion, specifically toward people identified as sexual sinners. I would challenge you  read, read through the Gospels, and see how Jesus responds to the Pharisees to the people  who follow the rules to the people who do have their life together, supposedly, to all  appearances, and then see how he responds to people who are accused of sexual sins, as to  people who are guilty of sexual sin that people bring before Jesus and say, you know, look at  this person, that they're a sinner, they're broken, you know, stand in judgment of them. And  Jesus's response to people who are sexual sinners, is one of grace and compassion, one that  welcomes them into His kingdom. Now, this grace of Jesus meets us where we're at. And so I  want to emphasize as we're talking about this subject matter that if you're carrying with you,  some kind of shame, some kind of guilt over your own sexual sin over your own sexual  struggles, I would encourage you to take that to Jesus, to let him breathe His grace and  compassion and love upon you to recognize that Jesus meets you where you are at. And so  the story of redemption here, as we think about this, is one of understanding God's intentions  for our sexuality, understanding that we all fall short, but understanding that we are all loved,  and that we are empowered by His Spirit, to walk in a new way of life. Because when Jesus  meets me in my sin in my brokenness, and when his grace comes to me in that way, that that speaks to me, that's something that that ministers to me, and it compels me, motivates me to live in a new and different way. It's not a motivation out of out of rules and motivation as  legalism, or motivation to keep up appearances. It's a motivation that has truly come in touch with the love of God. And that changes my life. And I know that that can change your life too,  as God works and speaks through this. So as we think about redemption here and God's  intentions for us, I want to be really clear that this is not about us, trying harder to be good,  but us understanding how God comes to us and meets us where we're at and empowers us  and gives us the strength to walk in newness of life. Now, when we think about the story of  redemption, we're gonna think about this in two units in this unit. We're gonna think  specifically about how Jesus's work of redemption affects marriage, and what that means for  marriage. And in the next unit, we're going to think about how redemption affects singleness  or celibacy, what that looks like for Christians in the church today. And as we dig into both of  these, part of the way that I want to think about this is through the lens of God's new family,  of God's new family. I want to read you something from Mark chapter 10, Jesus is talking to his disciples. And in Mark 10:29, Jesus says this, Truly I tell you, no one who is left home, or  brothers or sisters, or mother or father, or children or fields, for me in the Gospel, will fail to  receive 100 times as much in this present age, homes, brothers, sisters, mothers, children,  and fields, along with persecutions and in their life to come in an age to come eternal life. But many who are first will be last, in the last first. A couple of years ago, I read this, and it's a  passage I'd read before, but it hit me in a new way in verse 30, where Jesus says, you're going to receive in this present age 100 fold. 100 times as much homes, brothers, sisters, mothers, 

fathers. Part of what Jesus is saying here is that when we follow Him, we participate in a new  family, that when Jesus comes and brings the kingdom of God, part of what that kingdom  does, is it it knits us together into this spiritual family that has this bond in Jesus, that that  goes beyond our biological families. And that goes beyond even our marriages. In other  words, that when we think about our first and foremost identity, as a Christian, it's that I am a member of the family of God, I am a, I'm a citizen of God's kingdom. And so I want to mention that at the beginning of this unit, because of the danger of idolizing marriage of of making  marriage, the be all and end all, in the Christian life. We need to recognize that our marriages  are to be oriented toward God's kingdom. That our marriages are to be placed within the  context of God's new family, and that that identity, shapes us and then should shape our  marriages in this primary way. And so as we talk about marriages, we talked about the good,  the goodness of marriage and gifts of marriage. We never want to idolize marriage, we never  want to put marriage above, following Jesus seeking first the Kingdom of God, but rather to  help us understand how one of the ways that God calls some Christians to live out their faith  is through this mode of marriage. And so with that in mind, let's let's dig a little bit deeper  into thinking about a biblical theology of marriage and understanding what marriage is. In  Scripture, marriage is seen as a covenant as a covenant. A covenant is this, it's more than  just a contract. But a covenant is an understanding where promises are made, and promises  are meant to be kept. And so when we think about biblical marriage as a covenant, it's not  something that that you know that I just sign a contract and say, I'll do this for you if you  promise to do this for me. And we have a very contractual almost businesslike relationship.  But it's something that goes deeper that that says, I pledge that I will care for you, not simply  based on what I can get out of it, or what you can do for me, but I am making promises to  you. And that that shapes how we think about what marriage really is. Now to enter into this  discussion, I want to read for you a passage from Ephesians 5. Ephesians 5, Paul is talking  about what marriage looks like, for Christians. And in Ephesians, 5, I want to read verses 21  through 33. So it's a little bit longer of a passage. But I think it's really important to have this  in front of us as we as we think about what marriage really is. So Paul says in Ephesians 5:21,  "submit to one another, out of reverence for Christ. Wives, submit yourselves to your own  husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ as the head  of the church, his body of which He is the Savior. That so as the church submits to Christ so  also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands love your wives just as  Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the  washing with water through the word. And to present her to himsel.as a radiant church  without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In the same way  husbands to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After  all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ  does the church. For we are members of his body. For this reason, the man will leave his  father and mother be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. This is a profound  mystery, but I'm talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must  love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband." Part of what I  would want us to see part of what the amazing theology that Paul gives us in this passage, is  to see that there is a connection between the sign of marriage and the thing that it's  signifying, or what it's pointing to. What Paul says here is that marriage is actually a symbol of Christ and the church. That marriage is not just about two people who love each other to  people who care for each other. But but there's this, there's this mystery to marriage, that it  actually points us to this deep reality of Christ's love for us. Now, this means then, that when  we think about how marriage functions, or what marriage is supposed to do, that there are  some similarities to other practices that Jesus gave us. For example, when we think about  baptism, that part of what baptism does is it, it symbolizes, it points to the washing away of  our sin. It's this, this material visible sign that points to the spiritual reality that that the work  of Jesus washes away our sin. Or we can think about the celebration of communion, where a  part of what we do, there is we partake of these visible elements, the, the, the wine and the  bread. Part of what these things do is that they are visible signs and seals, signs and symbols  that point to the reality of Jesus's sacrifice for us. And there's a sense in which as we, as we 

participate in these things, they point us to this deepest reality of Christ's work of redemption. Well, part of what Paul is saying here is that marriage works in a in a similar way that  marriage is, he says that there's a mystery here in verse 32, a profound mystery, that the  visible sign and symbol of marriage that when I see two people, two embodied people who  join their lives, who join their bodies, in marriage, and in sexual union, that part of what that's pointing to part of what that's meant to point to, is the love of Christ for the church, and the  respect that the church has, for Christ's. Now I want to be clear here, it's it's interesting, a lot  of people read this passage and, and might think that this maybe sounds repressive or  oppressive, especially maybe in how it talks about women or wives submitting to your  husbands. But I want to point out here that Paul says in verse 21, submit to one another,  submit to one another, that this way of life that he's talking about in marriage here is not one  where one person is just supposed to submit. And one person is supposed to always be been  submitting and putting themselves sort of below the other person or are just serving or  obeying the other person. But that the image that Paul gives here is actually one where  husband and wife are both submitting to the are both seeking the good of the other before  themselves. In fact, Paul says, husbands, you're the ones who are called to lay down your life  to, to submit to the good of your spouse to put your wife before you in such a way that you  lay down your life for her as Christ laid down his life for the church. And so part of what  happens here is that, you know, maybe you can think of examples in your own experience.  Maybe you've been blessed by by parents who have an amazing, Christ centered marriage, or maybe there are other folks in your church that that you've seen, have a marriage that really  does embody and point to Jesus. That when you look at that marriage, you think, I am getting  a glimpse of the gospel, I am getting a glimpse of what it means for somebody to give of  themselves to pour out themselves for the good of their spouse. That that's what Paul says is  ultimately the meaning of marriage. That's what marriage is supposed to do here. Now, I think it's really important as as Christians, that we do emphasize this dimension of what marriage is all about that that We make clear as scripture does, that marriage is supposed to link into this biblical story, it's meant to link into the Gospel story of Jesus. Because even in our marriages,  it can be very, very easy to fall into some of the stories that we talked about in an earlier unit  to the story of individualism, or the story of romance, that those things can start to take  center stage when we think about what, what marriage is, or how we actually live in our  marriages. And so we have to continually come back to the gospel of Christ's love for us, so  that we can live that love out in our relationship to our spouse. Now, I want to highlight a  couple things that I think when we reflect on the covenant of marriage, we have to realize a  few things. And the first is that, especially for Christians, in Europe, in North America, there's  a sense in which we are very much in a post Christian world, a post Christian society, where  people are either just indifferent to the Christian view of marriage, or in some cases, they're  downright hostile toward it. And so that means that we have to work really hard to explain to  ourselves to our children to people in our congregation, we have to be clear about what  marriage is and what it isn't. We can't just assume that, that everybody just kind of grows up,  knowing what marriage is all about knowing what it takes to, to have a good marriage,  knowing how marriage is connected to the big story of Scripture, we have to do the work to  teach our kids from from a young age, here's how Christians view bodies, sexuality, marriage,  that it takes a lot of work, we can't just assume that they're just going to kind of get it out  there in the broader culture. And so we have to do a better job of, of teaching of explaining  these things as taking the time to cast this vision for what marriage really is. We also need to, I think, understand that the biblical vision of marriages is not natural. And I put that in scare  quotes a little bit what what I mean by that is, this is not a view that everybody just kind of  knows. That people just grow up and they just kind of know, well, you know, marriage is  between a man and a woman, it's meant to be this self giving total covenant that people  make these promises, and they keep, and they have this Christ like self sacrificial love, self  giving love, that that view of marriage is not out there that if we recognize who we are as  sinful people, apart from the Gospel, we are going to make marriage about us about what we  can get out of it about what's going to be most convenient or pleasurable, or ultimately just fit with our vision of life. And so we have to recognize that, again, this is not something that that 

anybody is just going to pick up on their own, but that it takes work to explain and help folks  understand the biblical vision of marriage. And part of doing this part of I think, connecting  marriage, to the big story of Scripture, connecting our marriages to the marriage of Christ in  the church, is actually returning marriage and maybe even returning our wedding ceremonies  to the church in ways that, that maybe we haven't in the past. And so here's just a couple of  things to reflect on and think about when it comes to practical concerns. One of them is this is I know, maybe a crazy idea, maybe outlandish. But one question I have is, if marriage is  meant to put the gospel on display, then maybe weddings belong as part of the church  service, rather than being their own kind of special set aside ceremonies. And I know maybe  thinking outside the box here, but part of part of my question is, what would it mean to  actually make weddings a part of our Sunday morning or Sunday evening service, a time of a  worship service where the body of Christ is gathered around these two people who are  making this covenant, that is a sign and symbol of Christ in the church, that really in in a  really powerful way is meant to put the gospel on display. Remind us point as to Jesus'  promise, and his faithfulness to his promises to us, and our call to be his faithful bride. Maybe  there's something powerful about about doing that, rather than making weddings primarily  about us, or primarily about this special day for us. It is a special day for the participants, but  it's, it's special. I would say almost in the same way that the baptism is special or that  participating in the Lord's Supper is special, because it is this sign that points us to this  deeper reality of who Jesus is. I also think that we need to, I'm thinking, especially in  American context here, we need to have a better practical theology of divorce. Largely in an  American context, when people get married, they go to the county courthouse to get their  their civil marriage certificate that says in the eyes of the state, they're married. And they  also participate in a church wedding ceremony with a pastor who marries them. And so  there's both the civil component and this church component to most Christian weddings. But  oftentimes, if there is a struggle in marriage, and if if it does get to the place where people  are seeking a divorce, there's a lot of complicated things that go into that. I know I think I  mentioned earlier the at the outset, my parents are divorced. So that's a that's just such a  hard thing for families for for, for people to go through. But I wonder what it would look like to  say our churches needed to do a better job of caring for people who are struggling with  thinking about a divorce going through a divorce. Rather than just saying, well go to the  county courthouse, you know, get your get your certificate of divorce. Right, get that through  so that in the eyes of the state, you're no longer married. We need to do more, I think on the  churches end to have a practical theology of divorce where, where we're either we're  challenging people to do a better job of following through on the promises or commitments,  or if the relationship has failed biblically, if there are biblical reasons to say, yeah, this  divorce, you know, we're sad about it. But this divorce is, is something that does need to  happen, where we can come alongside people and recognize that and still walk with them,  rather than what happens a lot of times, which is either either we sort of either don't get  counsel to people at all, we just assume you know, just kind of go on your way. Or, or people  end up feeling outcast, because they've walked through divorce in the church doesn't really  know how to walk with them through that. And so I think part of what we need to do here is  recognize that marriage is a crucial part of discipleship, and to make these things much more  a part of what we do, as the church. And we do that because marriage is so crucial as the sign and pointer to the reality of God's love for us that when we encounter a marriage that  embodies the love and faithfulness of Jesus, that that makes the Gospel story that makes  scripture more believable, because I'm seeing that put on display in my own context with  people right in front of me. So for churches, we have to care about marriage with to recognize that marriage is deeply interwoven with our call to follow Jesus. So that as we think about  what this looks like next time, we're going to dig a bit deeper into thinking about the  connection between sexual union and marriage, how to understand how these two things are  connected, and why it's so important for Christians to understand this. So until next time,  blessings