Video Transcript: The Decision Part 2

All right, welcome, again, my hope that things are going well for you. I hope you're having fun learning. Whether you're young, or in the middle or older, learning is one of the gifts that God  has given us. God is developing us into things that we have, we have no clue sometimes what God has in mind. Generally, God has way more in mind for us than we could ever imagine or  

dream of. And so learning, you have no idea what God is going to do with the learning that  that you're doing right now. And even if you don't know what you're going to do with this  course, or you don't know what direction your ministry is going to take you getting prepared.  You prepare, and then God can use you for things that are coming up in the future that you  can't even predict. The disciples spent three years with Jesus, they probably had no idea that  they were going to start the largest, most far reaching organization the world has ever seen.  The church, but all the while they were learning and growing. Jesus was preparing them for a  later purpose. So even if you don't see it, now, it doesn't matter, you work hard, and what's in front of you. And what's what's in front of you right now is this course. So keep at it, keep at  with the readings, doing the quizzes, and you know, keep pushing forward. Okay, we're,  we're, we're spending a little time looking at the first part of the coaching process the  decision. So let's continue on three things coaches do to accomplish this little review, again,  help the client figure out what they want to do make the decision, once they have a decision,  you help the client figure out how, how to do what they want to do, and that's a plan decision, then you make a plan to carry out the decision. And then finally, you help the client to do  what they plan to do. And that's management, ongoing management of the unfolding plan.  Alright, so we are in help the client figure out what they want to do, that's generally the  hardest thing. It's hard, because there's so many things you could do. And there's so many  things that people want you to do. And there's so many things that you're already committed  to do. And you only have so much time, there's so many things you want to do. So many  things you could do. So many things you should do. But there's only so much time. And it  seems like we have more things that we want to do and should do and could do than we  actually have time for and so it's hard to stop and reflect and think about it. So as a coach,  you know, I'm trying to help the client do that, stop and think about areas of your life. And so  I'm trying to give you models with which you can help someone do that. So there's three basic model categories that we're going to be looking at. And that is brainstorm. That's the the  model that we're sort of in right now. Or model category. And then number two, there's  prioritizing the things that you figure out in the brainstorming time. And then finally, the  different ways that you can make a commitment to actually do and pick out the the thing that you really want to do. So the first step, the brainstorm areas of action in your life, we last  time, we looked at the seven connections as a model as a way to help a client think about  their life. So we're going to, in this session, look at, you know, just basic random areas of a  person's life. These are just general areas of a person's life. And hopefully, your client can  relate to some of these. Again, the helpful thought shapers of this model, same as the seven  connections. One way to start thinking about the areas of your life is by problem where are  the problems and we're looking at a specific area of life. And then ask the question, Where are the problems in this area of life? Where's the pain or frustration in this area of life, to identify  it, to talk about it to think about it, and then try to figure out what we can do about it. So  problem is one way to go. It's kind of the more negative side It's not bad to do that. It's a good thing. It's a, if there's a problem, if you have an end, you have a thorn in your toe, you want to take it out, it's causing pain, you want to do something about it. So problems are a good way  to think about life. But there's an opposite kind of way of thinking about life. And that's  improvement. Okay? The problem is looking at the source of pain improvement is going well,  what what do we do to make things better. And certain people respond to one more than the  other. So you're presenting these two options to the client, you let him you don't decide for  him, he decides, or she decides what they want to think about improvement, a desire to go to the next level, in a certain area of life. Maybe it's not even a problem at all. It's just a plateau  and stuck. And you know, this areas is becoming frustrating for me, because I am expecting  more improvement that I'm seeing, and why is it? What can I do about it? Okay, so areas of  your life model, number one, a problem or improvement related to hobbies? Okay, hobbies  are generally those things you like doing, that don't necessarily make any money. Yeah, I 

don't know how else to describe a hobby hobby is something you like doing. Because no one  is forcing, you to do it. And generally, you're not making a living generally, sometimes what  people do is they turn their hobby into a job, or they try to make money at their hobby, and  then they lose the whole enjoyment of the hobby. And part of the enjoyment of a hobby is,  you don't have to do this. You don't have to make a living at this. You're doing it. Why?  Because you simply like it. So some of my hobbies I like, like a game called pickleball. If you  don't know what it is, you have to Google it. It's pickleball. It's all one word just like pickle that you eat and ball. If you Google that it's sort of in between tennis, racket ball or any, any kind  of sport where you use a racket. For this sport, you actually use a paddle. Anyway, I got into it about three years ago, I'm the currently the president of the Grand Rapids pickleball club,  that's the city that I'm from, we have 800 members. It's a huge organization, there's big  tournament next week and singing the national anthem at this tournament. And playing in the different aspects of it, you get rated as a player, there's all this stuff that goes with it. And a  lot of hobbies are like that my wife is a quilter it goes to the Quilt Guild and they have  monthly meetings and they have speakers that come in and then they have a quilt show and  they put their quilts in the show. And you can get a blue ribbon or a red ribbon and you can be judged you can sell your quilts. And so there's a whole system generally behind quilts, all  right, and behind hobbies, and you can just dabble in the hobby or you can get really into it. I  think God has, you know, blesses us with this interest in things just because we're interested  in things. I oil paint a little bit. And, you know, I like that as a hobby. I like pretty much any  sport that I play hockey with my my kids. So is writing hobbies. Some people like gardening  they live in, you know, growing vegetables or flowers. Some people like flower arranging, you  know, I'm from a Dutch background. And in the Netherlands, Dutch people in Dutch and men  especially get into flower arranging. People get into drawing. People get into all kinds of  things. I mean, there's, you go to a hobby store, you'll see all kinds of different things that  people my grandfather got into the little train sets, Lionel train sets and he he built the  villages and mountains and he had the trains going through. So that's what he got into. So  and I think God blesses us with interest in things just because we're interested in thing it  releases creative side and us God as a creator. He created the world of the infinite variety in  the solar system, the the you know, the light years of stars, all these things. God is just  interested in all this variety and incredible display of fascination and He's created us in that in that same image so we are interested in does something for us. It makes us feel a part of  things, it makes us feel creative and makes us feel like God must feel when He created the  world. And so it fulfills a need in us. And so, you know, you get your client to think about  those areas, you know, a lot of people, they have so much work to do that they never unleash their creativity in a hobby. And so there's a side of them that is dying. And then they're  pouring all their energy into the things that they have to do. And they don't do any of the  things that they want to do. And there's slowly shutting down. He, the God created the world  in six days, and on the seventh day he rested. So that might be a problem for your clients.  The problem is, he's just not resting. He's not taking one day to reflect on life and just do  something that he enjoys, read a book or take a walk, and the nature of my life is a birder.  She likes going out and finding birds and taking pictures of them and so on. That that gives  her energy. And because she does that she has energy to do some of the other things that  she she has to do. So we stopped with the client, we say, Well, let's think about this for a  minute. Other priser problem in terms of your hobbies, or is there some improvements,  something you'd like to change something you've always wanted to do. So I'll say all of a  sudden, now they're thinking about that, that might be the real problem in their life. Or a  problem or improvement related to work? For a lot of people, there's a lot of problems at  work. And there's people problems at work, a lot of people are doing something that they  don't really enjoy doing, but they do it because the job I have I have bills to pay and get a  mortgage to pay, I get a house payment, I get food to buy clothes to buy all these things.  And, you know, this is what I'm doing. But But But work is slowly killing me. And I think that's  true for a lot of people, and they don't know how to get out of it. To me, where would I? If I  wanted to change this situation? What would I do? So it's identifying the problem, what's the  problem, I think I'm in the wrong job, it is not matching with my gifts, or it's the wrong people,

or the product that we produce is not something I believe in is incongruity the between what  the company does, and the things that that I think are right and meaningful. And so every you know, I'm spending so much of my time doing something that I don't really believe in. So you  help them think about their work. Where are the problems? Where's the pain? Where's the  suffering, when it comes to work? Or is there some improvement? In You know, I like my work, but I don't like my position, I see some other things or opportunities in my workplace that I  think would be better suited for me. So you get them talking about, there's some problem  with work? Are there improvements? So what are we going to do about that? Our number  three problem or improvement related to school? So maybe, you know, right now you're not  working, you're taking these classes? Or maybe you're a young person, and you're in school,  and, and it's just not fitting you? Is there a problem with school, maybe you're taking the  wrong course of study, maybe you're thinking one direction, but you should go and do  another. When I went to college, originally, I was thinking I wanted to be a medical doctor.  And so I took biology and chemistry and those things. And, and after the first semester was  like, I don't even like biology and chemistry. I wanted to go into the medical field, because  ultimately, I wanted to be a psychiatrist. I like, I like working with people. And you know what  they do and why they do what they do. I was fascinated with the mind. Okay, I was not  fascinated with all the biology. So it was like, What am I doing? This is the problem. A lot, a lot of people you know, they study medicine, and they don't become doctors they enter some  medical field, and I thought, what if that happened to me, I'd be in some lab doing. I don't  want to work in a lab. So I was like, that was a problem. And if someone had put that on my  plate and said, Okay, let's think about school for a minute. Is there a problem? Yeah, there is.  I'm not really pursuing what I really want to pursue, but it has to come to my attention, or is  there an improvement is should I take this course instead of that course? You know, what  should I you know, is there a problem or an improvement related to school? Number four, a  problem or an improvement related to sports, again, that I think sports is part of the creative  world that God created. It's sort of interesting that work is often solving problems, but you're  trying to make a better product or we're trying to sell something to someone who may or may not want this thing. And so it's a problem. We're solving problems all the time at our work.  And then when we're tired of solving problems at work, we come home, and we take up a  sport, which is another problem, you know, how do I hit this ball past you? How do I, you  know, score by kicking this ball into a net, we make up these made up problems. I think God  is wired human beings to have a sense of accomplishment when they tackle a problem and  solve it. So, but maybe you're problem solving, you know, you're, you're in a sport that is not  giving you a sense of satisfaction. So is there a problem in this sport world that you're in,  you're on a team, but you're sitting on the bench, you don't get to play or you don't, in the  end enjoys some competitive, you know, people are taking it so seriously, that they've taken  the fun right out of it. And that's sucking the life out of you. So is there a problem? Or is there  an improvement? You know, you're stuck at a certain level? And, and how do you get to the  next level. And so the thing is becoming more of a frustration than something that gives you  energy. Number five, a problem or improvement related to your home? You know, what aspect of your home is a problem? Maybe it's the clutter? The you have more? I think that's true for a lot of people, we live in a materialistic world. Because in the industrial age, everything is  become incredibly cheap. And so we keep buying stuff. So we have stuff all over and we don't  know where to put it. There's buying stuff. And then there's how to organize the stuff. And  many of us are not good at the organizing stuff. I mean, where do you put all these things?  You know, I'm one of those I, I don't dare put things away, because I, I feel like I'll never find  them again, because I won't remember where I put them. So I put everything on the desk,  everything is out in the open, because that's the only way I'm going to be able to find  anything. Where's the thing I'm looking for? I don't know, it's somewhere in the open. If it's all put away, I don't even know where to begin to look. So, so we don't know, you know. But all  that clutter every time you walk into a room that's cluttered, the weight of all that stuff is  upon you. And every time you want to do something, you have to go find it. And so you have  this frustration, every time you're looking for the hammer, you have no idea where the  hammer is. So is that the problem in your home? Or is it the fact that your family's everyone 

has a different schedule? And every count, everyone comes and go and you never do  anything together? What's the problem in your home? Well, how would you identify that  problem? If there's things falling apart and they need to be fixed? What is weighing you down  in terms of your home? Or where could things improve and if they improved, you'd feel about  your you better about your life and your family. Number six, a problem or improvement  related to projects. Again, projects are like sports and hobbies is not maybe the you know the  main work that you do to make a living. But I think God is wired is this way to get into things. I have my oldest son is a he's a project guy. He lives in Ecuador now. And he married a girl from Ecuador. He lives there. He does software development. That's what he does for a living. But  he loves his projects. And he found some black sand on the beach and he took the black sand  and he put it in like a volcano thing and they started a fire and they melted all that sand down into iron. And then he got a hammer and he started pounding that iron and folding that iron  and making it into Damascus steel. And then he designed something that he wants to make  out of that Damascus steel, he made it, you know, on his computer, and then he has a lathe  and he's making all the pieces and the parts out of that Damascus steel to build this thing. He built a Geiger counter once to measure radiation to measure radiation. And he built it just  because it was fun to build and then I don't know what radiation he wants to measure. So I  years ago, decided I wanted to make a guitar I you know I played the guitar and and I  researched you know the wood and what wood you use and what wood does and how to  make the sound and you know and I had a you know how to bend the wood and fold the wood how to stain the wood all these things. Is is you know, once I got into it, I was like man you  know things can get as complicated as you want to get it to be. But that was all fun. It's like a  project. It's like you're you're attempting Do something that's outside of your, you know,  maybe what you were trained in. Maybe for some of you that that's what the Christian  Leaders Institute is, you're you're, you have a job, you have a family, you're doing all these  things. But you've always been interested in ministry, you've always been interested in God  things. And so you're just having fun taking this class and taking that class, and you have no  idea where you're going even do with these things. Is this project. But but is there some  project so you're getting, again, the client, think about the projects in your life? Is there a  frustration going on in the project, you know, your project world? Or is there some area that  you know, you'd like to get into that you've always wanted to get into some area of  improvement, or related to projects? Number seven, a problem or improvement related to  books, books that you read. Books, books are, books are an incredible thing. I know people  aren't reading as much today watching videos, and so on instead. But books can take you  anywhere, books can teach you anything. And so, you know, what kinds of things or books  leading you to what area of improvement in your life, and some of these books done for you.  Number eight, a problem or improvement related to people? Okay, I know this is a big, broad  general thing, but it just helps someone start thinking about Okay people, people at work  people at home people that I know people in the community, is there a frustration, yeah, that  guy I work with in the next cubicle is always, you know, saying these things that are bothers  me or whatever it might be my wife, or my kids or the neighbor down the road, and he has a  dog that barks all night. And whatever it is a brother or sister someone that you're dealing  with some issues. So you're just helping someone in a broad way to look at all these different  areas of their life? And asking the question, do you see any problems? Or do you see any  areas of improvement that you'd like to pursue? So you end up talking about these, let them  explain, you know, let them go wherever the conversation goes. And then finally, out of that,  you start looking at, Okay, is there any action oriented goal related to your hobbies, anything  that you'd like to do anything that you can think of that you'd like to do some goal, you want  to change hobbies, you want to try this hobby, you want to go to a camp and learn how to do  that. You just want to spend a weekend and learn how to do pottery, you know, whatever it  might be. Number two, or an action oriented goal related to work. As you think about work,  you think about problems and think about areas that you want to improve. Okay, so what  could you do? What, what goals could you make, that might change some of these things  might might help with this problem, or might lead towards some improvement and action  oriented goal related to school? You know, related to the courses that you're taking in CLI, 

what could you do? Number four, action oriented goal related to sports, you can get lessons,  you could try a different sport. You know, I love every couple years to try something I've never tried before. Okay, but, but, you know, sometimes they get frustrated and bored with the  thing I keep doing. And I just need someone to bring that to my attention. Well, hey, let's  think about sports for a minute. And as I talk about it, I realize Hold on, you know, I'm kind of  bored with what I'm doing. Maybe I should pursue something different. Five action oriented  goal related to the home, okay, what's going on in the home? Is there anything that I could  do? Number six, action oriented goal related to projects, new project, change the project,  actually get back to the project that's half finished, a lot of us have projects all over the place, half finished, and we, you know, we walk into the garage and we see all these things half  finished, and then we just get worn out. Maybe we just get, you know, some projects we're  never going to do and what we should do is just clear out of there. Why should we be be  reminded of our failure over and over and over and over again? Number seven, action  oriented goal related to books, number eight action oriented goals related to your world?  Whatever's going on in your world, you know, a question give me as broad as possible, you  know, okay, you know, you can go through all these different areas of life, or you can just add  the most broad general questions to your client that you could possibly think of, okay, in the  whole wide world. Is there any problem that you're experiencing? Like you pick? I can, I can  tell you all the different areas of life or I can just give you a blank slate and say, Oh yeah,  there's all of life. What problems are you experiencing? And then he in his mind has to figure  out he has to think well, where does his mind go right up the top of his head? Where would he go? Where, you know, and maybe the first thing he would say, is what he's really struggling  with, or maybe not. But it's just a way to get the thing going. Get a person thinking about the  problems or areas that they'd like to see improved. And then you can move towards action  oriented goals. Alright, so we'll, we'll continue this in the next session. Thank you.