Video Transcript: The Decision Part 2

Welcome again. My hope is that things are going well for you. I hope you're having fun learning. Whether you're young, or in the middle, or older, learning is one of the gifts that God has given us. God is developing us into things that we have no clue about — sometimes we have no idea what God has in mind.

Generally, God has way more in mind for us than we could ever imagine or dream of. And so, learning. You have no idea what God is going to do with the learning that you're doing right now. Even if you don't know what you're going to do with this course, or you don't know what direction your ministry is going to take you, getting prepared matters. You prepare, and then God can use you for things that are coming up in the future that you can't even predict.

The disciples spent three years with Jesus. They probably had no idea that they were going to start the largest, most far-reaching organization the world has ever seen — the church. But all the while they were learning and growing. Jesus was preparing them for a later purpose. So even if you don't see it now, it doesn't matter. You work hard at what's in front of you. What's in front of you right now is this course. Keep at it. Keep at the readings, doing the quizzes, and keep pushing forward.

We're spending a little time looking at the first part of the coaching process: the decision. Let's continue on.

Three things coaches do to accomplish this — a little review again:

1. Help the client figure out what they want to do — make the decision.

2. Once they have a decision, help the client figure out how to do what they want to do — that’s the plan.

3. Then help the client do what they plan to do — that’s management, the ongoing management of the unfolding plan.

We are in “help the client figure out what they want to do.” That's generally the hardest thing. It's hard because there are so many things you could do. There are so many things that people want you to do. There are so many things you're already committed to do. And you only have so much time.

There are so many things you want to do, so many things you could do, so many things you should do — but there's only so much time. It seems like we have more things that we want to do and should do and could do than we actually have time for, so it's hard to stop and reflect and think about it.

As a coach, I'm trying to help the client do that, to stop and think about areas of your life. I'm trying to give you models with which you can help someone do that.

There are three basic model categories that we're going to be looking at:

1. Brainstorm — the model category we're in right now.

2. Prioritizing the things you figure out in brainstorming.

3. Commitment — the different ways you can make a commitment to actually do and pick out the thing you really want to do.

Brainstorm Areas of Action

Last time, we looked at the Seven Connections as a model — a way to help a client think about their life. In this session, we're going to look at basic, random areas of a person's life. These are just general areas of a person's life, and hopefully your client can relate to some of these.

Again, the helpful thought-shapers of this model are the same as the Seven Connections:

• Problem: Where are the problems in this area of life? Where is the pain or frustration?

• Improvement: What would you like to make better? Where do you want to go to the next level?

Some people respond more to one than the other. You present both options and let the client choose.

Areas of Life Model

1. Problem or improvement related to hobbies

Hobbies are things you like doing that don't necessarily make money. No one forces you to do them. They’re enjoyable simply because you enjoy them.

Examples: pickleball, quilting, painting, hockey, gardening, flower arranging, drawing, model trains.

God blesses us with interests because they release creativity. They make us feel like God must have felt when He created the world — joy in creating.

Many people have so much work that they never unleash their creativity. A part of them is dying. They pour all their energy into what they have to do and never into what they want to do.

So you ask:

Is there a problem in your hobby life?

Is there an improvement you'd like to pursue?

This might be the real problem in their life.

2. Problem or improvement related to work

For many people, work is full of problems — people problems, job mismatches, lack of meaning, wrong environment, wrong product, wrong mission.

Work may be slowly killing them, but they don’t know how to get out.

Questions:

• What’s the problem?

• What’s the pain?

• What’s the suffering?

• Is there an improvement you’d like to pursue?

3. Problem or improvement related to school

Maybe you're in school and it's not fitting you. Maybe you're studying the wrong thing.

Example: wanting to be a psychiatrist but hating biology and chemistry.

Questions:

• Is there a problem with school?

• Is there an improvement you want to make?

• Should you change direction?

4. Problem or improvement related to sports

Sports are creative problem-solving. But maybe:

• You're stuck at a level.

• You're frustrated.

• The team is toxic.

• The fun is gone.

• You want to improve.

5. Problem or improvement related to your home

Common issues:

• Clutter

• Disorganization

• Broken things

• Family schedules

• Lack of togetherness

• Household tension

Questions:

• What is weighing you down?

• What needs improvement?

6. Problem or improvement related to projects

Projects are like hobbies — creative outlets.

Examples:

• Melting black sand into iron

• Making Damascus steel

• Building a Geiger counter

• Making a guitar

• CLI coursework as a “project”

Questions:

• Is there frustration in your project world?

• Is there a project you want to start?

• Is there a half-finished project you need to address?

7. Problem or improvement related to books

Books can take you anywhere. They can shape your thinking, your growth, your direction.

Questions:

• What are books doing for you?

• What improvements do you want in your reading life?

8. Problem or improvement related to people

People at work, home, community — anyone.

Questions:

• Is there frustration?

• Is there a relationship that needs attention?

• Is there an improvement you'd like to pursue?

Moving Toward Action-Oriented Goals

After exploring these areas, you ask:

• Is there any action-oriented goal related to your hobbies?

• Related to work?

• Related to school?

• Related to sports?

• Related to home?

• Related to projects?

• Related to books?

• Related to your world?

You can also ask the broadest question possible:

“In the whole wide world, is there any problem you're experiencing?”

Where their mind goes first may reveal the real issue.

This is all brainstorming — exploring possibilities, identifying problems or improvements, and then moving toward action-oriented goals or an action-oriented goal related to work. As you think about work, you think about problems and think about areas that you want to improve. Okay, so what could you do? What goals could you make that might change some of these things, might help with this problem, or might lead toward some improvement?

An action-oriented goal related to school.

Related to the courses that you're taking in CLI — what could you do?

Number four: Action-oriented goal related to sports.

You can get lessons. You could try a different sport. You know, I love every couple of years to try something I've never tried before. Sometimes I get frustrated and bored with the thing I keep doing, and I just need someone to bring that to my attention. “Well, hey, let's think about sports for a minute.” And as I talk about it, I realize, “Hold on — I'm kind of bored with what I'm doing. Maybe I should pursue something different.”

Five: Action-oriented goal related to the home.

Okay, what's going on in the home? Is there anything that I could do?

Number six: Action-oriented goal related to projects.

A new project, change the project, actually get back to the project that's half-finished. A lot of us have projects all over the place, half-finished, and we walk into the garage and see all these things half-finished, and then we just get worn out.

Maybe we should get rid of some projects. Some projects we're never going to do, and what we should do is just clear them out of there. Why should we be reminded of our failure over and over and over again?

Number seven: Action-oriented goal related to books.

Number eight: Action-oriented goals related to your world.

Whatever's going on in your world — the question can be as broad as possible.

You can go through all these different areas of life, or you can just ask the most broad, general question to your client that you could possibly think of:

“In the whole wide world, is there any problem that you're experiencing?”

You pick. I can tell you all the different areas of life, or I can give you a blank slate and say, “Okay — there's all of life. What problems are you experiencing?”

He, in his mind, has to figure out where his mind goes. Where does he go right off the top of his head? Maybe the first thing he says is what he's really struggling with — or maybe not. But it's just a way to get things going, to get a person thinking about the problems or areas they'd like to see improved.

And then you can move toward action-oriented goals.

All right, so we'll continue this in the next session. Thank you.