Video Transcript: Biblical Foundations on Communication

Hi, my name is Ron Carter, and I will be your instructor for this course. This course is called  personal and ministry assessment for Christian ministers. And just to tell you a little bit about  myself for the last 15 years I've had the, the the distinct honor of working for a national  leadership development program for for urban youth ministers is called the DeVos urban  Leadership Initiative. And, and while our minister focuses mostly on the lives of urban youth  workers, I believe that the principles that you are going to learn from this particular course is  applicable to ministers, and in any walk of life. So it doesn't matter whether you are a youth  pastor or a senior bat pastor. As a matter of fact, we get requests all the time for from senior  pastors asking us, Hey, why don't you guys do a course like this for for senior pastors, we  could benefit from this. So. So we're excited about being able to offer this course to you. And  again, you may be a senior pastor, you may not be a senior pastor, you may be at the very  beginning stages of your ministry, or you may be someone who's well advanced in your  ministry. But we believe that this particular course will be highly beneficial to you, in you  becoming the best that God has for you to become as a Christian leader. And so, in order to  get us started, in this first lecture, we're going to focus our attention on the importance of  being a good communicator, one of the things as you will know, in Christian ministry, one of  the things that we utilize a lot of words, we, we use words a lot, as a matter of fact, our  currency is in words. And so I believe God will have us who have been called to impact the  lives of others to be effective in the usage of our words. And so we want to begin again, this  lecture, we're going to call that biblical foundations for communications and liker began by  just kind of having you to think through a couple of thoughts as it relates to communication  and the importance of communicating effectively. First thing for you to think about, to ponder, what has your life experience taught you about the importance of communication? Now, think about that. What has your life think four minutes, as you reflect back on your life, what has  the importance of communicating effectively taught you about, again, communicating  effectively in from your life experience? It could be that your parents may have been like my  parents, when when I was a kid, I was always told that if you don't have anything good to say, then don't say anything at all. Perhaps your parents who also liked mine who taught me to be  respectful in in not only what I said, but but how things are so. So you may have had personal experiences like that, to draw parcels. So think about that. What has your life experience  taught you about the affordance of communication? And it could be that you've had some of  those full paths where you said things that you should not have said, or you did not mean to  say, in the course of communicating with others, and your life experience bears out the  importance of being able to communicate effectively. Second thought, I'd like for you to  ponder, is this. What insights from Scripture? Have you learned about the importance of  communication? As we'll see, in just a few minutes, the Bible has a lot to say about the usage  of words, and why words are important. And so we're going to take a few minutes now in this  lecture to examine not all this is not going to be an exhaustive study by any stretch of the  imagination, but it will be we will examine some of the most salient passages in Scripture that deal with what God has to say about communicating effectively. Now, are you ready? Are you  ready to get started? Well, let's take a look at what what the Bible has to say about  communicating effectively. So we're gonna take a look, go ahead on and get all of these  verses up, and then we're going to go back and look at each one of them in in sequence. So  as we see here, we have a number of verses here, we're going to first take a look at a number of passages that come out of the book of Ephesians. And then we're going to look at a text  that is very familiar that comes out of the book of Proverbs, and then we'll finish up with a  text out of the book of James Now as we as we think about these verses that are found in the  book of Ephesians, before we move to the first verse, I want to just pause for a minute and  just kind of give some contextual information as relates to the book of Ephesians. As you will  know, the book of Ephesians, where was written by, by the apostle Paul, in fact, Paul wrote  two thirds of the New Testament and so Paul was a prolific writer and this particular letter that he wrote to the Ephesian church to primarily talk to them about what God had done for them  in Christ. So as you look at the outline of the book of Ephesians, what you'll find is that in the  first three verses, among the first three chapters of the book in Ephesians, Paul kind of gives  us a theological grounding and theological foundations for what God has accomplished for us, 

you and me, as believers in Christ Jesus, Paul tells us, what God has accomplished for us, in  Christ. And that's exciting. I don't know about you. But Ephesians is one of my most favorite  books of the Bible, because it gives me this robust theology, this visual, this grand vision of  

what God has accomplished. For us. Those of us who named the name of Christ Paul gives us  this grand vision about what God has accomplished. For us. He talks about great doctrines like the doctrine of predestination and election, and and all those grand doctrines. Paul lays that  foundation in the first book of Ephesians. But then, once he does that, once he lays that  foundation, that fabulous Foundation, Paul shifts gears in the second half of the book,  chapters four through six. And Paul talks about, then How then shall we now live as believers  as a phrase that comes from the late Francis Schaffer, who, who coined that phrase? How  then shall we now live in light of the reality of what Jesus accomplished? On the cross? So  now, having laid that foundation, let's take a look at this, this first passage, as, as Paul wrote  in the book of Ephesians, Ephesians, chapter four, verses 14 through 15 says, Then, we no  longer will be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind, of teaching, and by the cunning and craftiness of people in their deceitful scheming.  Now, look at the second part of this verse, and stare at Paul says, speaking the truth in love,  we grow up to become I'm sorry, we grow, we will grow to. I'm so sorry, not reading that very  good this morning. Let me start and read that over again, I do apologize for that. Paul says,  instead of speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature  body of him, who is the head, that is Christ. I want you to notice from this text, that Paul tells  us that God is concerned about us being truthful and honest, in our communication. Notice,  Paul said, speaking the truth, how God expects you to not only be truth tellers, God also  expects us to tell the truth in such a way that is God honoring that is people honoring  innocence that we don't. We don't just we're not just Cavalier, as well, I just just got to tell you the truth, you know that there are some people that believe that I just need to tell you the  God's honest truth. And it doesn't matter how it comes out. Well, according to this text, God is concerned. God is concerned about not only us being truth tellers, God is concerned about  how we tell the truth. The idea here is, God is concerned about our tone. You know, I have to  be honest here. I struggled with this area, particularly as it relates to tone sometimes,  particularly in my home relationships with my wife and with my kids. I have to admit, I've not  always gotten this right. And if my son was here, he'll tell you the number of times that I've  had to come and repent to Him, ask Him for forgiveness, because as things are spoken truth,  but I didn't speak it in love. I was harsh in how our communicated to him and I hurt his  feelings. And now we have to go back later and her son You know what I say it was true. But I  didn't say it in a way that was God honoring, I hurt your feelings, I'm sorry, can you forgive  you. And without fail, my son is always forgiving his, his his sometimes harsh father, who  knew no better. But sometimes I've spoken in a way that that hurt his feelings and so. So  while I may speak the truth, I have to always be mindful of the fact that I need to also speak  in such a way that is not hurtful, or not harmful. So from this text, God expects us to be truth  tellers, but He expects us to tell the truth in such a way that our God honoring as well as as  well as honoring of the person to whom we're talking to. Let's look at the next verse from the  book of Ephesians. And this particular passage is very similar to the first verse that we just  read. Here, Paul says in Ephesians, four, and 25, he says, Therefore, let each of you put all  falsehood and speak truthfully, to your neighbor. And then Paul gives the rationale, or the  reason why this is true. Because Paul says, We're all members of what one body, not two  bodies, not three, but one. If you are a member of the Body of Christ, then you are my  brother, you are my sister, we're family members. So so those are also the sins from this  letter of this text. In particular, Paul is given instructions to a family that has brothers and  sisters in Christ. Again, not only should we speak truthfully to one another, were to speak to  one another, using some passion with understanding. And again, Paul says, because we are  members of one body, so we're to speak truthfully. But once again, to reiterate with do it in  such a way that honors the people to whom we are talking to. Ephesians 4:29 Paul says here,  do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouth, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their knees, that it may benefit those who listen. Have you ever left  food in your garbage can for several days without taking it out? And then you go into your 

kitchen and you wonder what's that smell and something stinks Something doesn't smell  quite right or perhaps you let some food in your refrigerator for for several weeks. And that  food spoil it took me some meat that you had planned to cook but you never got around to  cooking it and and you did not put it in your freezer and that fully spoiled. And when you open the refrigerator, that's the stage, the smell of that food, just kind of kind of knock you back  and you're like, oh my goodness, that stuff stinks. I had one of those occasions recently where my wife bought some some some some hamburger meat and with the intent for me to grill to  put on the grill and, and one day when I went to grill the meat, I opened the package up and I  smelled it and it almost knocked me to my feet because it was that was such a foul smell. And I had to discard that particular hamburger meat it was no longer good. Well, you may say,  Well, what's that have to do with anything? Well, it has everything to do with this text.  Because the word on the wholesome that Paul uses here in this particular verse speaks of  talk, that is what it is, that has become spoiled, if you will. So the word on Hosni appall says  Do not let any rotten file come out of your mouth. But then he tells us what kind of talk should come out of our mouth impulses, but only that which is helpful or edifying. We should talk in  such a way that is wholesome, that builds others up and then Paul says, according to their  needs, is according to what they need. We need to speak in such a way that is edifying that  builds people up. Paul says that it may benefit those who hear and so it was very, very  important that you and I are very careful about the words that we use. That our words don't  tear others down, but that our words build others up and that it ministers to their knee Paul  says to the, to their knees. So So you kind of have to be in relationship with people to  understand what their needs are. So it's vitally important that you do that. So, so we look at  these three verses what we have what have we learned? God expects us to be truthful in the  way we communicate, God, the unexpected rotten words that come out of our mouths that  may be hurtful or harmful to others that we are communicating with. Paul expect Paul says  God expects us to use words that edify and build people up. Let's look at another verse. Verse out of Proverbs, Proverbs 18:21. And this is a very well known verse, I'm sure you have, have  had maybe priests from this word before this passage before. Proverbs 18:21 says that death  and life is in the power of the tongue. And that is a powerful text. It really communicates us  again, the capacity of the tongue to build up or to tear down. So we have to be very, very  cognizant that we have this weapon behind our teeth, that we have a real weapon, behind our teeth in our mouth. And it is incredible to think about that God has given us this, this capacity  of speech, this capacity of human speech, and just think about how reckless people can be  with their words, but but the writer of Proverbs tells us that death and life is in the power of  the tongue. And those who love it will eat the fruit of it. In other words, when you're going to  eat what you sow, you got to eat what you produce, the benefits or the results that come  from your your, your words that you use, will produce a result. So if you use words that are  antagonizing, then that's what you're going to get coming back to you. If you are harsh with  people, they're going to give that back to you. But if you sow love, and if you sell compassion  in your speech, then that was going to come back to you as well. The tongue has the power of life. And that's a huge responsibility that God has given us that the tongue has an incredible  power, power to heal, power to lift up power to, to inspire. Think about some of the greatest  speeches that you've heard, in your lifetime. I'm not sure what country you may be. And you  may be in Africa, you may be in Asia, but but whatever culture you come from, I dare say that there have been speeches and poems that have inspired you that have lifted you up. I live in  the United States. And everyone in this country is familiar with the I Have a Dream speech,  one of those famous speeches that were given by the late Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr, who use  words to inspire a whole nation to rally behind a particular vision, a particular cause of loving  and respecting people according to the content of their character, and not according to the  color of his skin. He use words to do that. He use words to rally a nation I think about the late  President Kennedy, Kennedy who said as not what you can do for your country, as not what  your country can do for you, I'm sorry, but what you could do for your country, those inspiring words, that again, that uplift and inspire people to rally people behind the cause. We do that  through the use of our words went the wrong way. Final text and want to look at is found in  James chapter one. Perhaps in no other chapter of the book, sorry, no other book of the Bible 

gives the greatest exposition on the use and the power of the tongue, then found in the book  of James, in this particular text. James admonished us with these words. James says My dear  brothers and sisters, take note of this. And what is it that we need to take note of? James says everyone should be quick to one. quick to listen. slow to speak and slow to become angry. But I want you to notice the progression. He says we should be slow and excited. We should be  quick to listen. We should be slow to speak. And then we should be close, slow to get angry.  Anger is an emotion. speech comes out of our mouth. Being able to listen, ears. I don't know  about you. But when I was a kid growing up, my parents, my grandparents, and even my  teachers used to always remind us with these words, the reason God gave you two ears, and  one mouth is that he expects you to do twice as much listening, as you do talking, twice as  much listening, as you do, talking. Now, if you're like me, I used to talk a lot as a kid, I had to  learn the skill of being able to listen, doesn't come natural to most of us, because most of us  like to talk we'd like to be heard. We live in a culture right now where everybody is vying to be heard from from YouTube channels to, to Instagram, no matter what it is out there. Everyone  now wants to be heard. Everyone now is a journalist. Everyone has their opinion. And now we  all have access to that. But But according to James, waiting to be slow, to speak, quick to  listen, and slow to become angry. And so from this text, we learn again, the importance of  being circumspect. being slow about when we should speak that we don't always have to say  it was on our minds. One of the things that my wife always remind me of, and that is this is it  just because it comes on your mind, doesn't mean you have to speak it out of your mouth, as  she loves to tell it is that just because is on your mind, doesn't mean it has to come out of  your mouth. Just because you have a thought doesn't mean you just have to let it come out of your mouth. Sometimes you just need to learn to be quiet. And I think God would have us to  do that, as well. So in summary, what have we learned from this particular introductory  lesson? Well, number one, God expects us that you and I are God expects us to be honest, in  our communication. In other words, God expects us to be truth tellers. That is one of the  marks of a Christian is that a Christian is a truth teller. So whether again, whether you're a  minister, whether your youth pastor, whether you are a senior pastor, whether you are a  pastor, whether you are a counselor, doesn't really matter what your role is, but as a  Christian, God expects us to be honest, in our communication, that doesn't apply to just  verbal communication, although that's what we're emphasizing here. But it also applies to  your wind communication. It applies to the tweets that you that you send out, it applies to the your posts on Facebook, it applies to your Instagram accounts, God expects you to be honest,  in your communication, no more matter before the communication. God expects us to be  honest, can I hear a man out there? Next point. In summary, God expects us to build others  up. That's the goal of communications not to tear down, but to build up. So when you and I  communicate, God expects our communication would be such that rather than tearing others  down, it will build people up. So building others up should be the goal of our communications.  And then, thirdly, words matter, our choice of words really do matter. So because our words  matter, it is very, very important for us to be careful about the words that we use. Our words  really do matter. So once again, what have we learned? Number one, God expects us to be  honest in all our communications, number two, building others up. In other words, edification  of others, is the goal of all of our communications, no matter the form. And then finally, word  choices matter the words that you and I use, in many ways, have eternal consequences.  Remember what the Lord Jesus said, in the book of Matthew, Jesus said that every idle word,  we will give an account for our robot you that frightens me, that gives me reason to pause  when I contemplate and think about that I'm going to have to get an account for the words  that are used. I want to take a moment now, to pray for you. We've covered a lot of territory.  And, and I'm sure that given you something to think about and to pause for right now, I want  to take a moment to pray as we bring this first lecture to a close. Father, in the name of Jesus, I thank you for this awesome opportunity to have been able to share just a few truths, not all  the exhaustive truths that are found in Scripture regarding principles of communication but  but but I've been able, through your grace and Your mercy to, to have been able to share I  pray for my dear brothers and sisters in Christ who, who are listening to me whether they are  watching via their their tablet, their computers, laptops or tablets, whatever it means by 

which they are listening and watching me and taking this lecture and I pray for them, that you would bring the necessary understanding and maybe even conviction to their hearts, that  that will help them to improve in becoming effective communicators. Father, we thank you  and Father, we praise you and give you all the glory and all the honor for everything that has  transpired. In Jesus name. Amen. God bless you