Video Transcript: Lesson 6 Section 2

What is your first impression when you hear the word mentoring, your outlook will determine  the approach you take with your students. For example, if you see mentoring as based on  knowledge, most of your time will focus on teaching. On the other hand, if you see mentoring  more as counseling, you will spend your time analyzing the issues your students face and  provide advice. There is a third style of mentoring in which the focus is on building  relationships. Let's explore this approach and how it can help students towards spiritual  maturity. The goal of mentoring through spiritual discussions is to help youth process what  they believe so they may develop a deeper faith in God. strong and lasting faith is formed  through robust discussion about God, ourselves, and the world around us. And the faith of  youth must be engaged in healthy relationships in order to grow. Relationships are extremely  important in the life of a teenager. Youth establish their identity and beliefs through the  feedback they get from their peer group, family and friends. As a spiritual mentor, we must  take a Relational Approach. However, making friends with the students is not the ultimate  goal. The student does not need another peer in their life, but a caring adult who shows  maturity in life and spiritual matters. In a healthy mentor relationship, the adult is still an  adult. Don't try to fit in and be one of the teenagers. This approach will undermine the value  you bring in wisdom and experience. Leading spiritual discussions is a key way to mentor your students and build a relationship. There are three things involved in this discussing personal  life issues, communal scripture engagement, and developing spiritually formative practices.  When mentoring first begins, students may not immediately feel comfortable discussing their  personal life issues. In this case, you as the mentor should take the lead. Don't be afraid to  open up and share from your experiences. read Scripture together and talk about its  application to both of your lives. Bring the conversation around to action items that give the  student a chance to form spiritual disciplines. Here are a few practical ways to effectively  engage your student during a mentoring session. Firstly, it is essential to listen to the  personal life issues of the youth and have a caring attitude to what is shared. Secondly,  discuss the topic by engaging with Scripture and potential applications to the student's life or  your own. Thirdly, challenge the student to take action on the spiritual truth they're learning.  Finally, close the time by praying together. Let's take a closer look at how to accomplish these tasks during your mentoring time. One great approach is ask questions, or word them in a  way that allows for open ended discussion and observations about life and God. The goal  should be to give the student a chance to process opinions and reflect on the issues.  Remember, you do not need to be an expert to lead a discussion. You might be concerned  that a student will ask a question you don't know how to answer. But it can be healthy to say I don't know the answer. Let's discover it together. A good mentor will model how to search out  truth from Scripture. You may find that students disagree with your opinion, or have a  negative reaction to something they read in Scripture. Encourage honest responses and press the student to process their thoughts and beliefs. Analyzing an issue and having to provide  support for their opinion is an important part of Spirit lead formation. Your goal should be to  promote an open dialogue. Watch out that you don't get defensive or criticize the student for  saying what they think. Remain positive throughout the discussion and affirm the students  engagement. Avoid harsh comments or critical statements that would cause the student to  want to shut down. As a leader try to talk less than the student does. Don't be afraid to ask a  question. Then leave silence for them to think of an answer. If the student expects the leader  to always do the talking, they will remain quiet and unengaged. Encourage students to ask  questions too there is no such thing as a silly question. cultivate an environment where the  student feels safe enough to ask anything. If you're mentoring multiple students at one time,  make sure they take turns talking. Everyone should have a chance to express their opinion.  Finally, keep what is discussed confidential. Make sure your student knows that what is said in the room stays between you demonstrate that you are trustworthy, so they feel comfortable  being open and honest with you. These are some things that will help you structure your  mentoring. But remember, the goal is to build a relationship. And that means investing time in your students outside formal mentorship situations. Here are some ideas about how you can  connect your students in daily life. Remember that we recommend male mentors for male  students, and female mentors for female students. Invite the teenager into your home to 

experience your daily life and visit with your family. Giving them a glimpse into your  environment will deepen the relationship. You can also ask if they would like to join you in  doing your normal errands such as cooking, shopping or business tasks. This will show the  student how to live as a Christian with the normal demands of adult life. Use text messages,  phone calls, or email to stay in touch, communicate information, a prayer or word of  encouragement. Remember, this is not a replacement for face to face contact, but it can help  the relationship continue to grow. Be sure to utilize the time before and after church services  to talk with your student. Seek them out and make sure they know you care about what is  happening in their life. You could also take a student you're mentoring to visit another  member of your small group together, get them involved in each other's lives and help make  those connections. There are many things you can do to develop your mentorship relationship with a teen God has placed in your life. One question you should ask yourself is what is  reasonable amount of time I can invest in my small group and students I want to mentor it is  easy to become too busy. Don't over commit yourself in your desire to help others. After this  video, take some time to look at your schedule. And think about the number of hours you  could invest well in mentoring your students. Remember, Jesus chose 12 disciples, but he  intentionally mentored only three. Think about who those people are for you, and how you  can engage in their lives and faith journey.