Video Transcript: A Flaming Romance
On our churches Bible reading plan, we've been reading on Wednesdays, the Song of Songs, and that'll be wrapping up this week Wednesday. And as we finish that book, I do want to focus on it in today's message as well. I, of course, have other reasons for having been thinking about these matters lately. So I'm kind of in the mood to look at Song of Songs. And so we're going to read up just a couple of verses from that in Hebrew poetry, it would actually be five verses, Hebrew poetry often runs in pairs. And here are five pairs of lines that really get at the heart of what we're to gather from Song of Songs. Set me as a seal upon your heart, as a seal upon your arm, for love is strong as death. Jealousy is fierce as the grave. It's flashes are flashes of fire, the very flame of the Lord. Many waters cannot quench love, neither can floods drown it. If a man offered for love all the wealth of his house, he would be utterly despised. This ends the reading of God's word, and God always blesses His Word. To those who listen. A lot of you've heard the story about the Sunday school teacher who asked a question. The question was this What's Gray has a fairy tale and collects acorns for the winter? The answer was, I know it's gotta be Jesus, but it sure sounds like a squirrel to me. in Sunday school, no matter how sure you know, the it's just gotta be Jesus. Well, when you read the Song of Songs, great theologians and Christians throughout the centuries have taken a little bit of the same approach. When a song says I love you, I long for you, I can't bear to be apart from you. You're lovely. You have a fantastic body and I want it. What's that song talking about? Well, I know it's got to be Jesus. But it sure sounds like romantic love to me. And that over the centuries has kind of been how Song of Songs has been treated as it's not really about all that stuff. And of course, some 10 year old boys are relieved to hear that one of my friends tells me that they heard from one of their kids this week, yeah, last week sermon was should have been rated M for Mature. And you know, that icky stuff in Song of Songs. If you're not interested in boys or girls at a certain age, then it's even less interesting. But the fact is, when you read Song of Songs, it sure does sound like it's about romantic love between a man and a woman. And you may think, Boy, that was quite a stretch for some of those Christians of the past say, well, here's what it's really about. The fact is Song of Songs is about romantic love between a man and a woman. But those old Christians weren't entirely wrong either. Because the romantic love between a man and a woman is about God's love in Christ. The Bible tells us that, and so it's we shouldn't say well, because ultimately, and at its deepest level, it's about Jesus. Therefore, it's not about all that other stuff. It sure is about all that other stuff. It's about romantic love. But romantic love itself was designed by God and intended by God, to reveal the love of God Himself. We see that in the central line of this little poem that we've read from Song of Songs, it's flashes are flashes of fire, the very flame of the Lord. Paul says when he's speaking of marriage, and telling husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the church and wives to submit to and honor their husbands and respect them, says, this is a profound mystery, but I'm talking about Christ, and the church, and marriage is about Christ in the church. And when God designed marriage, when he brought Adam and Eve together, God already knew that ultimately, he was revealing something deeper about his own love. Isaiah 62, five as a bridegroom rejoices over his bride, so will your God rejoice over you. And in that very last book of the Bible, the wedding of the Lamb has come, and his bride has made herself ready. So it's not an either or it certainly is about romantic love when we read Song of Songs, but then were to remember that romantic love is about the great love between God and His people as well. I want to look at the five pairings, the five couplets, if you will in this poem, The first is about the fact that love is loyal. and lasting. The second is that it is strong, and it is fierce, strong and fierce as death. Third, that this love is set ablaze by God's own fire fourth that it remains a flame and alive through every flood. And fifth, that it's precious beyond price. First of all, this kind of love is loyal. And it's lasting set me as a seal upon your heart as a seal upon your arm. Now what's a seal, a seal was formed in olden times, not just by a little stamp of ink or, or something else that we might associate with a seal, but it would be imprinted on clay, and the clay would be soft, and then the seal would have a certain shape to it, and you'd put that on the clay and then that soft clay, you'd leave it out to harden. And once that imprint was made, then and it hardened, it was there to stay. When we built our house and and poured some of the concrete then each of the kids whom we had at the time, put their handprint in the concrete and it was soft and their hand just fit
right on it. But you can't get rid of that handprint now, because it's there, it's set in concrete. And here the the one is saying to the other set me as a seal upon your heart, your heart might match right now might not be set yet, but set me as that seal, and have there to stay on your heart and on your arm. So the very core of your being is shaped by the other person whom you love and your actions the arm represents your might your strength, your actions is directed by the love of that other person. And this love is loyal and and it's lasting you read in chapter two verse four of Song of Songs, he has brought me to the banqueting house, and his banner over me was love to have that time together in the banqueting house to have that time when we're joined together in the promises of marriage promises that we stick to. That's what love is, it's loyal, it's lasting. And my mom's here today and my dad before they head out again. And they've, they're only going to be celebrating 56 years of marriage this year. So they're kind of new at this. But my mom's older brother has been married even longer, I believe 62 years now. Now, that actually is a pretty good long time. But my uncle John also has held the job for a while he's held the same job for 71 years. He started working at a hardware store when he was 16. Now he's 87. And he says he doesn't work there. He just helps out now. But he has been literally at the same job in the same hardware store for 71 years. I think that's got to be awful close to a record. But when it comes to church involvement, he's kind of a fly by night. He's only belonged to his congregation for 60 years. He he grew up in a congregation. And then when he and Aunt Irene were in their 20s, they became part of a mission church plant. And then they've been part of that one ever since 1949. So they're not really fly by night people, I guess you could say, now in America, it's you don't run into a lot of that. You don't run into people who have held a job for 71 years, we're a pretty mobile society. And some people may wish they could have held their job longer, but couldn't. But jobs change. People like to do their church shopping in their church hopping. And so they switched churches every few years. And it's a little bit like in marriage of some don't ever want to be accountable as part of a church. So they'll they'll kind of hang out, but they don't want to commit. And when it comes to marriage, it's more and more common for people to say, well, we're just going to live together for as long as it works out, but 62 years. We don't make promises like till death do us part. In fact, in the cause of honesty, maybe that's been good. They've changed the vows in some cases, to instead of as long as we both shall live to as long as we both shall love. Well, okay, but that's not marriage anymore. If if it's this conditional, as long as I feel vibes for you, I'll stick with you and then when it's over, it's over. So this love between a man and a woman is loyal and lasting the seal gets said, it gets imprinted on the clay and then it's there to stay. And you make that promise and you keep that promise. When you read Song of Songs. This committed love sees another person as as royalty. Some have understood the Song of Songs to be about Solomon's love for a girl. Many, many scholars now believe that's a mistaken way of understanding Song of Songs. It isn't about Solomon adding one more to his harem. And in fact, when you read chapter one, verse seven, she says, Tell me, you who my soul loves, where you pasture your flock, he seems to be a shepherd, you know, an ordinary Shepherd, not the big king with all the chariots and horses and the big harem of women, and she's a country girl. Solomon is mentioned a time or two. But Solomon's OWN WISDOM sometimes didn't direct to the way he behaved. Solomon had 1000 women. And Solomon wrote the book of Ecclesiastes, here was a man who had all the money you could ever want. And Jesus says in the New Testament of Solomon, he could buy some mighty fine threads, and fabulous clothes. Well, I tell you, that the flowers were still dressed better than Solomon, and it wasn't the result of a whole bunch of money. And here we learned, well, Solomon may have been able to have all these women, but somebody who's got one true love is better off than Solomon with this 1000. Then Solomon himself said in Ecclesiastes, when he was near the end of his life, and it learned a lot of things. He said, enjoy life with the wife, whom you love. He didn't say enjoy life with the 1000, like I have. And Wilt Chamberlain, the great basketball superstar once said in one of his books, that he had gone to bed with 1000s of women. And he was a little boastful in one sense about that. But then, he was also in conversation said, but I have sometimes wondered whether 1000s of times with one woman might have been better. And certainly Solomon would say the same thing. And, and here, you know, she sees this young shepherd, but she'll talk of him in pretty royal
terms. He may not be the king of this great realm, but their home is their castle together. He's a king, she's a queen, they delight in each other. Now, this loyal and lasting love is true of real love between a man and a woman. It's also an emblem of God's great love. Two Hebrew words that come in pairs an awful lot in the Bible, are hassad and Matt, steadfast love and faithfulness. If you read the Psalms, or you read a lot of other parts of the Bible, you'd find those, that pair of words coming up in sentence after sentence after sentence, the Lord the Lord, this is where God is declaring his name, YAHWEH, the Lord the Lord, a god merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness. Another example, Psalm 36, verse five, your steadfast love, oh Lord extends to the heavens, Your faithfulness to the skies, and this steadfast love, this loving kindness of God that never quits. And this faithfulness, another translation is simply truth. He IS TRUTH, He is faithful, God keeps His promises. And we are never more like God, than when we love. And when we keep promises, that is when you are most like God, when you keep your word, and show your love. God is love God is truth. And when he's reflected in our lives, then we have a love that's loyal and lasting. The second pair that we're going to look at the pair of lines is love is strong as death, jealousy is fierce as the grave. Now, how is love as strong as death, there are a number of ways one is simply that death is always coming after us. And each generation is getting closer and closer to it. And yet humanity is not extinct. Last time I checked. And a reason for that is love keeps producing life. And death does its thing, but life does its thing too. And you get a hint of that even in chapter eight verse five, under the apple tree I awakened you there your mother was in labor with you there she who bore you was in labor. So evidently there's a family story that years ago, Mom was kind of resting under this apple tree, um, crunching away, and all of a sudden, oh, I think I'm gonna have this baby. And the very same spot where she has met the guy who has now grown to be a man and and wakened him. So in that, of course, it might be just a cute story at one level but at another level, it's this love and the power of love doesn't start when two people get starry eyed. It goes back to mom. And when mom went into labor, and when mom and dad fell in love, and further back and further back, and death has done its thing throughout the generations, but so has love in so his life. And so whenever we lay a loved one to rest, as Lauren's family had to do this week, we recognize also the power of love, and of life, to continue. And we recognize too, that when a loved one dies, the love has not died. Julia Lorenzo's love lives on in this world. And those whose lives were touched by her love, continue to be strengthened by it. And I know that for Jerry and Esther, it was also a tremendous act of love to take a mother failing from Alzheimer's in and they didn't say, Well, you know, you know, it was kind of handy when she was capable, and her body was healthy, and her mind was all there. We liked her then. But that's enough, you know, we're done with her. Now, the love didn't die, just because some of her capacities died. And so love in those ways, is stronger than death. The new generation that springs out of love continues to the next generation, the love that we have for each other doesn't die just because we do. And we know too, that that love continues that when our loved ones are in glory, we will be reunited with them in God's own time, and in his good mercy. And there's a little more reason to say that love is stronger than death. I'll get to that in a minute. There's also that talk of jealousy being as unyielding as the grave and that is a part of romantic love. It is to be possessive to say I don't want you running off with this and that and the other person. You have captivated my heart my sister, my bride, how beautiful is your love? A garden locked is my sister, my bride a spring lock the fountain sealed. That's talking about a woman saving herself for one man. And it's an exclusive relationship, a kind of holy jealousy, chapter six, verse three, I am my beloved's. And my beloved is mine. And the word jealousy in our use of that word, sometimes it just means you wish you had what's not rightfully yours. It's sometimes used almost like coveting. But there's also a good side to jealousy. And that is just this concern that you be faithful to each other, that you stick with each other that you save yourselves for each other. And that's a reflection of God's own love and God's own jealousy. Exodus says You shall worship no other God for the Lord whose name is jealous is a jealous God. Take care lest you forget the covenant of the Lord your God. Marriage is a covenant but our relationship with God is a covenant to be careful lest you forget that covenant. The Lord your God is a consuming fire. A jealous god it's dangerous to mess with
jealous love, including the jealous love of God. The encouraging side of that is that this jealous love steps in to protect and defend and rescue the beloved. The Lord became jealous for his land, and had pity on his people, says the prophet Joel. Thus says the Lord of hosts Zechariah I am zegt jealous for Zion with great jealousy, and I am jealous for her with great wrath. And here he's talking about all the beating up that Zion Jerusalem Israel has taken and how because he loves her. He's zealous, and those enemies are about to get it. And Israel is about to be rescued. So God's love and that jealous love is the love that moves him to save and to rescue people. And that love is stronger than death, those whom God loves. He gets fed up with death and he says, Okay, that's enough death. He will swallow up death forever. The Lord God will wipe away tears from all faces. The last enemy to be destroyed is death. At the very end of the Bible, Death and Hades were thrown into the lake of fire. And why is that true? Well, because God is love, and God had a head start. And we sometimes think that death has been around forever. No, death has not been around forever. God has been around forever. And God is love and whoever lives in love lives in God and God in him. And so God has been around a lot longer than death has been and God will be around After death is long gone. And he has promised to wipe away every tear. And so when we speak of love being stronger than death, and when we're speaking of romantic love, we're speaking about its fierceness, its passion, its refusal to give up, it's continuing from generation to generation. But ultimately, we're talking about that eternal power of God, that love which will not let death have the last word. And so it is a great joy and comfort that love is stronger than death. And picking up on that same theme, it's flashes are flashes of fire, the very flame of the Lord. God really hasn't been mentioned in Song of Songs until this verse, and even some translations don't follow what the text says. They just think, oh, it's being very poetic about saying it's a mighty flame. But it does literally just say, the flame of the Lord. And it's probably best to take it that way. That all love between a man and a woman, all true love is lit by God's own flame. And it's just a spark of the eternal flame. And that's why love can sometimes just been very awesome and overwhelming. Read those words from chapter six, turn away your eyes from me, for they overwhelm me is they all come out, he's just getting a little gooey. No, he's feeling overwhelmed. Who is this that looks down like the dawn, beautiful as the moon, bright as the sun, awesome as an army with banners. What a thing it is, when a woman looks at you, and loves you, and wants to give her life to you. And you say, Whoa, this, there's more here than I bargained for. And the big reason for that is that behind the love of a person is a person made in God's image. And behind their love for you, is the love of the eternal fire. And sometimes it's a little too much to take in. And you just say, Well, I don't know if I can take this anymore. And I think that one of the most important things we need to know about love is that it is this fire lit by God Himself that in encountering our beloved God himself can be coming to us. And we can feel a sense of amazement and awe that God is such a person, and that He's given me such a person. Now, when we picture love as a fire, it is important to know a couple of things about fire, don't play games with it, is one important thing to know. And so that's why whatever words you want to use for it, some approach to courtship and meeting people that isn't what's going on currently in our society is pretty important to keep in mind. One way not to play with fire is when you pair up your seeking a spouse, not just the fun of a recreational romance, where you get all excited about each other for a little while. And your intent is simply to if the last couple of months, and we have a good time, no harm done on to the next one. On to the next one on to the next one, you get a lot of practice for starting new relationships and breaking up. And good many people continue that pattern well into their married life and then their next married life and then their next married life. The The aim is to seek a spouse, not just a recreational romance. And secondly, then don't pair off. If you're not within shouting distance of marriageable age, you know, we I know already on our street, we've got kids that aren't even out of middle school who are already dating, where's that gonna go? It's either going to go nowhere, or it's going to go some very bad places. But one thing it isn't going to do is go anywhere, productive. And so there's really no point and you're just playing with fire, if you want to get into all sorts of romantic relationships that have no possibility of moving toward marriage. A third thing in the in the whole course of wisdom is where possible to involve families and to have both the support as well as the accountability
that comes from not just being the two of you, but from being part of a wider web of people. And if you do start courting somebody, and it's clear to you that this isn't the one, don't play along, don't mess around with fire, you learned what you needed to learn. If you weren't meant for each other, then it was still a successful relationship in one sense, because now you know what you need to know, but don't prolong it, or do things with each other that just aren't appropriate for people who aren't going to get married. And of course A fifth marriage is the context for the bodily desires God's given us. And so wait for the consummation of marriage until you're married. Those are just some fairly straightforward things about not playing with fire. Now, again, you can lay down all sorts of legalisms, and this and that, and that can cause more trouble than it's worth. But the basic and fundamental principle is you don't play with fire. The goal is to meet a person and find out if you're meant to be married. And what a joy it is. If two people are in love, and they've never been in love with anybody else, or in bed with anybody else, that's a tremendous blessing from the Lord. That's the way it's meant to be. And so this isn't just weird people's ideas about courtship, it only seems weird, because we're living in the weirdest age and society in the history of the world, when it comes to playing games with these matters. Never in any other society was our approach of people having flings from the time they're 10 years old onward. That was just never practiced in any society, but are. So we should realize that if you do have some sort of courtship principle, you're not the oddball it only seems like it because you're living in a certain very strange portion of world history. Now, of course, along with that, you don't play with fire, and when there is fire, it's best tapped in the fireplace. And that means with married love, we also have to guard the love we have for each other. And that means that we enjoy the love that we have together. Frequent expressions of affection, and of consummating marriage are commanded in the Bible, and very key to having a healthy relationship that doesn't head off in other directions. There's a lot of occasions for temptation in our society. Sometimes in the workplace, when you have men and women working together, often on the road, in the world of entertainment, certainly. And just to recognize what those are. I did mention last week that it's hard to avoid all temptations, as the Apostle Paul says, at one point, you'd have to go out of the world, you know, to pull that off, because every billboard, and many programs have a lot of stuff, but we need to keep fire in the fireplace. Passion is a private thing. But sin is something you don't want to just keep your own dirty little secret. You need to be honest and accountable in order to deal with such things. And then being part of a wider fellowship, wider, extended family of spiritual and fellowship for the church. These are all things that that help us to stay on track. One of the reasons, by the way, why people have a hard time staying in married relationships, and not the only reason but one of them is many don't have the wider web, it is related to our mobile society. They don't have the wider web of extended family there to help them and support them. It's much easier to ditch your spouse when you've already moved somewhere else. You don't have any community to hold you accountable at all. Again, in saying these things, I know that there are dear friends right here who say, Oh, ouch. You know, you look at your own life. You know that. It didn't always go the way that God's plan would lay it out. But that too, is something that we can come together and realize God's mercy, God's grace, God's love God's forgiveness, and rely on that, and thank Him for His grace. But as you do that, don't go looking for more trouble, okay. God's grace, renews us, lifts us up helps us make a fresh start. But it certainly is not just an excuse to go on doing the same dumb old thing again. Well, that that fire that is lit by God, that eternal fire of God's love is one that doesn't go out when it stays lit by God's love. And that's why it's so important. That's why I preached yesterday, again to Maria and Nathaniel, but also to all of you that we don't just get married and just use God's love as kind of a resource. It's ultimately all about God's love and marriage is a resource to help us love better and to know God better. But when it is really rooted and fired in God's love, then Many waters cannot quench love. Neither can floods drown it. Quenching is pouring water on a fire and putting it out. And most of you know what drowning is. Something alive goes underwater and can't breathe anymore and suffocates and drowns. Well, this kind of love can't be quenched and it can't be drowned. Part of the wedding vow is well, for better for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health. That's those phrases are just a recognition that floods Come. And when those floods come? Well, the Love can't be
put out. And we've seen some wonderful example. I know just many wonderful marriages that are encouraging here, but also the extraordinarily difficult floods that some people have had to face. Like the Lorenzo's. and Mrs. Lorenz is husband, or Sherry And Phil, the floods came, there was more sickness than health, a lot of times in your marriage, but those floods didn't drown the love, did they, and God gives us people in our lives, to show us really how wide and long and high and deep is his love and how it carries our love, love, bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things, love never ends, that flame is not easily extinguished. In fact, it's impossible to put it out. In Isaiah, speaking of God's love, the Lord says, Fear not for I have redeemed you I have called you by name, you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you. And through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you. You are precious in my eyes, and honored. And I love you. Whether it's our relationship to a spouse, or to God, there are going to be the rivers and the floods, you can figure on that happening. But also know the flame and the flame that never dies. And finally, this kind of love, well, you know, the credit card commercials already. You can buy this and you can buy something else with your credit card. But some things are priceless. And certainly this kind of love is priceless. It says if a man offered for love all the wealth of his house, he would be utterly despised. He says, Oh, I would really like to have a loving relationship. Let's see, what could I buy that with a million? Or would it take 2 million? How about five? Does that really get the love going? Well, I'm afraid sometimes wealth does get something going. But it sure isn't love. And it's just saying here you can't buy it. You can't put a price on it. And here again in the last chapter of Song of Songs, says Solomon had a vineyard in this book of the Bible vineyard is often a representation of the person's love that they have to give and talks about Solomon having a vineyard. Yeah, yeah. To vineyard. All right. He had 1000 Different women as part of his harem, his collection of women. He let out the vineyard, the keepers. Each one was to bring for its fruit 1000 pieces of silver, there are some who think that's a hint that, hey, Solomon couldn't possibly deal with 1000 women. Um, so he would rent them out. There are some who think that may have been the case, you know, if you have a royal harem of 1000 people, then some of the people who are in good with you can have a rent a wife. Well, at any rate, whether that's the meeting or not, or whether he's just looking at the fact that Solomon had a big harem. The statement here is well, my vineyard my very own is before me you owe Solomon can have your 1000. Well, that's, that's telling you that there's no price on this. Solomon had really had piles and piles of gold, he had wealth, he had power. And this guy says, You can have it. I've got something that's worth more than all of that put together. And one of the dangers is sometimes it creeps up on us in marriages to fail to realize what a priceless blessing we have. And so you're looking at the checkbook, you're looking at the finances, you're looking at this you're looking at that and wishing you could have this be better or that be improved. Sometimes there's just a point to say okay, better are a few vegetables with love than T bone steak with strife as the book of Proverbs puts it repeatedly, better is the one spouse God gave me then if I were Solomon, and just had everything but came up empty. And that's what Ecclesiastes is about the guy who had everything and came up empty. The guy who had 1000 women, and never had true love. If you got true love. It's beyond price. And thank God for it. And thank God again for that supreme love. That's beyond all price, God being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses made us alive together with Christ by grace, you've been saved and He raised us up with Him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus so that in the coming ages, he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. God is rich in mercy. He shows immeasurable riches of grace. And these are things that money cannot buy. These are things that only the great love of God, and the precious blood of Jesus Christ could pay for, and have paid for. Let's just read these verses again and we'll close with that. Let's stand and say together. Set me as a seal upon your heart, as a seal upon your arm, for love is strong as death. Jealousy is fierce as the grave, it's flashes are flashes of fire, the very flame of the Lord. Many waters cannot quench love, neither can floods drown it. If a man offered for love all the wealth of his house, he would be utterly despised. Let's pray together. Father, thank You that You have loved us with such great love. And you have given us a taste of that love, in the relationships we have with
each other, and then Lord flooded our hearts with the love of the Holy Spirit. Lord, we praise you that Many waters cannot quench love, because ultimately that love is the flame of the Holy Spirit, the third person of the Trinity. We thank You, Lord, for the tongues of fire which came upon your disciples and which we can celebrate next week on Pentecost. We thank You, Lord, for the ascension of Jesus Christ, for his reign over all things that he has put all things under his feet, and then we could celebrate that ascension just a few days ago. And so we praise you reigning Christ and we praise you burning flame of the Holy Spirit, and we praise You God our Father, for making and redeeming us to live in love through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.