Video Transcript: Home Discipleship Connection

I just love the seven connections. I love how Steve articulates that, how we can get  encouraged that in all the tapestry of our lives and all of our connections, God is at the center, and a walk with God is at the center. I want to turn our attention to specifically focus on the  home discipleship connections. That's connection, one, two, and three. And look at how those connections function in our leadership, as we are called, into ministry to minister to others. So as we look at the home discipleship connections, in a lot of ways, this also helps us focus on  our own life, and see how these connections can function. I'm gonna start by giving us a  snapshot from the 1800s. So here's the writer of the 1800s, about Christianity, JR, Miller, and  he talks this way, all ordinances of Christian worship, and specifically, he's talking about  connections, one, two, and three. Seasons of prayer and devotion, hours of communion with  God, are quiet resting places, far more than we are apt to realize, do we need the silent times  in our busy lives? Near them all, the more the busier, the life may be? What's fascinating to  me about JR Miller's comments is that this was written in the late 19th century. And they  thought that their lives were busy. So he was trying to encourage believers to get back to the  home discipleship connection, that the fuel of a walk with God is having quiet time with the  Lord. devotions. Having the sense of intimacy and feeding that intimacy. You know, we've  talked about what a walk with God is all about. It's about that talking. It's about that listening.  It's about making that real and present in our life, that we talk, listen repeatedly in love and  obedience to God, in our personal life, in our marriages, if we're married, or maybe it's with a  friend that we know that we can share our walk with, or it's in the family, if we have children at  home, or we have an opportunity with grandchildren. So that talking is prayer listening is Bible reading. The repeatedly is the habit. So let's talk about some of the issues of home  discipleship. And I loved what David Burns talked about, in the book, Dangers, Trolls and  Snares Resting, Resisting the Hidden Temptations of Ministry, Mastering Ministry Pressure  Points. Anyway, he said, Imagine, and this is again talking about walking with God, the habit  of walking with God. Imagine the rights that every time you sit down to eat, you thought about  all the food you would eat, would have to eat during your lifetime. Imagine a huge room with  tons of meat, that you're both Twinkies and Fritos. And 1000s of gallons of ice cream. And  before you die, you've got to consume every bite. Just the sight of all of it makes me sick. We  would say this one little meal is a drop in the bucket. There is no point of eating it. The secret  is, of course, we only one meal at a time. It's amazing how much we can consume in a  lifetime. If we eat one meal at a time. In a lot of ways, a walk with God is a feeding on the  Lord. You know the the metaphor of communion that we partake of the bread and the wine is  talking about that the Lord fills our spirits. When we do that in church, we believe the Holy  Spirit is presently in the Spirit of Christ is present. When we do that, when we do home  communion, we are talking about the same types of things that the Lord is there with us. As  we're walking with the Lord, by opening his word, invite prayer. If you look at just one little  piece of it, you'd say, oh, that's just one little piece of it. But what about a lifestyle, my dad  recently passed away. And it was his habit since I was a child, and up to 99 years old, that he  would open the Word of God and his meals in pray, and have that secret time, that quiet time  that dutiful time with the Lord. Often he would sang and, and when we worship through song,  it's again, very prayerful, and sometimes songs teach us we listen to God's word. But if little  by little, that's our lifestyle, over a big period of time, the grace of the Lord, His Holy Spirit  shows up in dynamic ways that we could not imagine. So how do we get to a real life  understanding of this? Well, in a lot of ways, the the problem comes with the effective  management of priorities. And we have to figure out how to prioritize our life, so that we can  actually do what we want to do, because we are busy. There's so many issues that hurt us  that unplug us in terms of just finding time with a figure out how to do this sustainable, you  know, I've noticed, you know, many times that people will want a walk with God, and they just 

can't seem to manage that. Listen to what it says in Matthew 25:20-21 master you said you  have entrusted me, we have five talents, See I gained five more. His master replied, well  done good and faithful servant, you've been faithful with a few things, I will put you in charge  a million things come and share in your masters happiness. A walk with God is an incredible  thing. It's a little thing. But just because it is a little thing, doesn't mean that we can easily do  it. But when we get this little thing prioritized as a minister, as a Christian leader, it changes  everything about our life. In some ways, we understand that with eating, the little thing of  eating food is necessary for us to be healthy, to have strength. But the little thing of feeding on the lord of having his word opened. opening our hearts down, it might be a little thing, but it  has huge implications. Now, when we manage this little thing, one thing that will become clear is that it will not be necessarily easy. And we need to be aware of this thing called law and  grace. So anytime you want to make changes in life, you are attacking between the two  shores of law and grace. Now, let me talk about that a little bit. You know, I've gone sailing  with Steve Elzinga, Professor Elzinga in British Columbia. And when there's rocks on both  sides of some of those waters in British Columbia, and when you're tacking a sailboat, you  have to go toward one rock. But before you get too close, got tack the other way. And before  you get too close, go tacked the other way, in a lot of ways, a new habit when you want to  change something, when you want to manage something like a habit of reading the Bible  prayer, quiet time worship time. In a lot of ways, it's like tacking between law, one side of the  shore to graze on the other side of the shore. And why well, I just find this so interesting that  you The one side is law, you know, that is, we need to do it, it's important. But if we get too  enamored, too, into law, too preoccupied with law, and all we do is just do it for law, it is  activism. Soon, if we succeed, we almost become legalistic. And we hit into the rocks of  legalism. On the other hand, when we realize that, you know, we failed, and sometimes that  happens if you fail. And you know what happens if you fail in law too much, you can get so  discouraged, forget the whole thing, I'm not going to do it. So what you need to do is, turn the  sailboat a little toward grace and say, you know, I'm just human, it's been a bad time, oh,  Lord, please forgive me. I am not giving up, I'm not giving up. I'm gonna stay in this for the  long haul, you're able to bring forgiveness of yourself to the table. And that's what happens.  When you're developing a habit, so many habits are this tack, so to speak, between law and  grace. And it's having the ability to be able to manage your habits, so that you understand  this, and don't give up and yet, keep going and don't get caught up too much in law where you get frustrated, but don't get caught up too much in grades doesn't really matter. While it  doesn't really matter in the big picture, and God loves you, you're not gonna like, try to  impress God, he already loves you. This is about managing a very important habit. And when  you manage a very important habit, it is difficult to do. So what it's about then is fighting to get  good habits. The fact of bad habits are caught easily good habits are planted and cultivated.  You know, I find that as being a pastor, you know, if a minister and you're ministering to  people, and I am always amazed at how quickly bad habits develop, you really have to think  about it develops. Whereas a good habit, it takes effort and work, and there will be tests to  those good habits. And why? And I've thought through that, why are good habits so difficult to  acquire? Well, I believe that good habits are going against the grain of just the flesh. They're  going against the grain of busy life. Life comes at us. A good habit is something that we  prioritize. We want this and by God's grace, and his empowerment is something that we can  move into. Because there is no doubt about it. There is great power in our habits. Now let's  talk about that in terms of connection, three family. Now, for generations upon generations,  the dinner table used to be the centerpiece piece of family life. But in recent years, especially  in Western nations, fast food was injected everywhere. So the dinner table was no longer the  centerpiece of family life. Now what Christian families did is they attach family, Bible reading, 

prayer, even singing to that habit of eating. My own childhood is an example of that. You  know, it did not matter what day it was, we would eat at the same time. We would open the  Bible after we ate. We would pray after we ate. And many times, there would even be times of family worship. There was a memorization component in my childhood, like all of a sudden,  my dad would say, you know, The Lord is my shepherd. I shall not want to we would do that.  When I raised my own children. We had habits connected to our dinner table, where we  would memorize Scripture We even were part of a church that Dr. Feddes is still pastoring  that there were a once a month hymn sings we call them, where families gathered together to  recite the passages that they memorized while doing their home discipleship in their homes,  such as doing a memory verse at the dinner table. All of these habits in the past were  connected these spiritual habits, these home disciples and habits were connected to the  dinner. When those dinner habits over a long period of time, kept multiplying effect was  amazing, biblical literacy. People were exposed to the Word of God exposed to a relationship  with God. Now I understand, like like any habit for some people, they were just sitting not  paying attention. But for many people in for a good portion, even younger people were not  really paying that much attention. The Word of God was being proclaimed every day. And that habit was extremely powerful. You cannot force someone to have a relationship of God. But  we're called to proclaim the gospel in proclaim the Word of God. If we attach it to a family  habit like eating together, that becomes very powerful, because the word of God will not  return void. Now, there are other habits that are regular repeated activities. Daily common  habits, going to bed waking up brushing teeth, starting school, checking email, and others.  What's interesting is to ask yourself, Could I connect a walk with God with some of these  habits, like going to bed for years and years, my wife and I read devotionals right before we  gone to bed, then we opened the word. We've changed it up over the years. And always in  being that time before we shut the light off. With prayer. Together prayer. Now, what's  interesting about that is I've seen some studies that have shown that when couples pray  together, these couples will get closer and closer to the Lord. And closer to one another. It's  an interesting, there was I remember, years ago, I worked for the Bible League. And the Bible  League actually, there was a study that showed that the divorce rate is 5%. For people who  couples who actually pray together. So that's tiny in connection to habit to going to bed. Now  what that does is incredible implications. If you go to bed together, you typically feel closer. If  the Lord is there, you feel even closer yet, many times it helps with sexual intimacy, because  you're to bed at the same time you're in that beautiful space together. It also been helps in  just feeling of closeness in the Lord is there. So you know, these habits are really, really  important. No, let's go the opposite way. What if you brushed your teeth? Like, one clock one  day, five o'clock for another day? What if you did various things in various ways, and you  didn't even pay attention to setting them in the habit? What was your life be like, but habits  form important milestones for us. For instance, if I know I'm brushing my teeth, when I wake  up, I go to bed at the head site connect good teeth care with going to bed or waking up in the  morning. So it's the same with God, what habits if we want to, like move to a closer walk with  God? When will we do journaling isn't connected to a habit? So these become very vital as  we're seeking to grow in very busy schedules. You know, I find it interesting that lifetimes, we  don't really do reality checks in our life. Okay, so we live to a very busy reality or been very  busy schedule a reality check right now. So what in my schedule makes me is making me  busy, but not productive. So what's happening to you right now? Are there certain habits that  contribute to my stayin too busy Are there big picture things that need to be addressed? And  that can be a such thing? As, you know, do I have a relational issue with God? Am I bitter  towards somebody else? Do I? Do I have help in deciding my priorities? Sometimes, we just  need to ask our mentor or get a mentor or ask the pastor ask our spouse for help. Do I need 

help in managing my priorities? These are all vitally important things to think about. You know, a lot of times we do the same thing we don't want to do because we just don't address the  plan to do what we want to do. Managing our home discipleship connections are extremely  important. If we do not, do not manage our home discipleship connections, life will manage  our life for us. You know, I was just thinking about the Word of God on this. And we have  many, many passages in the Word of God, that encourage us with being disciplined. Proverbs 27:18, he who tends a fig tree will eat its fruit. He who looks after his master will be honored.  You know, what's this talking about? It's talking about how the bottom line is, it does take  effort, it does take some work, some attention, for us to be able to get the goal we want. If we  want to have a goal, to walk with God, it takes a little effort. The issues in your personal life,  are great training for your ministry leadership. I love that passage. I Timothy 3:4-5, he must  manage his family well, and see that as children obey him with proper respect, if anyone does not know how to manage his family, his own family, how to take care of God's church. What I  love about that is it really talks about how personal management, that's the management of  connection, three family, where the Lord, whereas word is a center of our family. Now, I will  tell you, you have no guarantees that each child will walk after the Lord when they're 14, 15,  16 years old. But generally, it is true that your children do walk with the Lord, I grew up my  parents opened the Word of God. And, you know, at a young age, I've walked with the Lord.  But some of my siblings had different paths in that, but in general, over time, the word of God  was central. And, and I believe that with my own children, I see a great amount of love for the  Lord, that was developed when our children were young. Now, life, you may have it and I  have it to where people have different spots in their relationship for the Lord. But when they're at home, is the Bible, the central feature of that devotional life that you want to place in your  home in prayer, and will see the Holy Spirit as a time and a place. Even if one of your children or Sunday is short and have walked away? Know that the word of God was planted. Now,  some of you may have risen, raised your children. And you did open the Word of God in  prayer and all of that, and that's fine. maybe now's the time, maybe have grandchildren, or  now's the time to strengthen your own connection. Maybe you're married, strengthen your  own connection. I understand. This is not one of those things where some easy formula fits.  But it's about culture. It's about habits that increase your closeness with the Lord. And at first  it didn't it kind of difficult to get those habits in your life. But as you struggle and figure out how to organize your life around connection, one, personal walk with God and section two for  married, pray together, open the Bible together, connection three for family and home, how to  open the Word of God, how to sing, how to memorize all of those things. It takes some time  and it's not necessarily easy to accomplish. But that becomes part of a culture that deepens  biblical literacy that deepens, walks with God. And that opens the door for great possibilities  with the Lord. Now, I tell you, it can be difficult, and I understand that. So let's get real  practical with these home discipleship connections. So write down connection, one, two and  three, on a piece of paper, decide how you're going to do talking and listening with God  repeatedly. And each of these connections, kind of get a sustainable plan, in actually attempt  to do it. Now, I'm telling you that if you were to accomplish this, let's say you want to do a  family plan, or a personal plan or marriage plan, and let's say, you have failed, or let's say you go one time of success in the week with the family, praise the Lord. Because the week before  you had zero success with that, possibly the goal here is not to try to make your life  miserable. The goal is to move in a direction, get a plan, and truly promote what you want in  make the plan fun, especially for home discipleship to action three, if it's just a drag, and you  keep calling attention to how unhappy you are, you're trying to do this whole plan and, and it's just so difficult. And then, and then you have an argument and the family, you know, a lot of  ways, figure out ways to get this into your life, where you're sort of having fun with it. Now, 

here's an example. So you have some teenagers at home, great. Are young people grade  school? Well, you know, maybe one of the young, or one of the kids is a fast eater. Great, first one done. And then you say, hey, you know, Hey, Jessica, will you read the Bible today, and  you get a Bible reading plan. And the same goes to the New Testament. And so while  everybody else is finishing, eating, someone's reading the Bible, now they don't mind just  sitting low longer, which is very possible, read the Bible afterwards. That's what we did in our  life. You know, all of these things are just great opportunities. For you know, seeking to good  habits in your life and making them fun, or memorizing maybe while you're still eating. The  Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. Another thought. I'll say that the other in three, four  minutes, you can have a whole passage of memories, and have fun. Maybe you get little  stickers, we've used stickers. We've had fun. We had points. I know people who have like  said to your children, hey, we'll give you 100 US dollars. In America. If you read the whole  Bible in the year, and there was like a little Bible reading plan. All of these things, it'll be  creative. In some ways, this is a life coach session. So here I am a life coach and minister  and I say to you, so what do you want? I actually think a beautiful life coach position would be a walk, coach, someone who works with a family and helps someone get a good walk with  God in their family. What a great opportunity. We have a life coach Minister program, maybe  some of you who really understand how to make habits fun, can be life coach ministers, with  a specialization in walking with God. So you can talk to your pastor and say, hey, my  specialization is helping people in a fun way. Get in the habit of walking with God. You know,  this is one of those things where you just go deeper, deeper, have more fun with it. But there's no question about it. This won't necessarily be easy. It's simple to understand, but not  necessarily easy to do. There will be wolves, get ready for spiritual attacks. If your family or if  you are with your wife, start reading the Bible on a regular basis and praying on a regular  basis. Get ready for new attacks you never thought possible. Well, I guess you can take it  from there. My prayer for you is this. From Romans 16:20. May the God of peace. Or the God of peace will soon crush Satan, under your feet, the grace of our Lord Jesus, be with you all.  That's how I feel about getting a home discipleship habit, whether it's connection, one, two or  three. I believe that the devil is there spiritual warfare is there to try to discourage you. But  don't give up. Stay with it. God has a plan. You can do it. If you want to do ask the Holy Spirit  to help you Get help. If you're great at this, become a life coach, minister with a specialization  on discipline, walk with God and just announce to the church, hey, this is my thing. And I'd  love to schedule a time with any family to help you get that great, reproducible walk with God.  You know, we live in very busy times, as JR Miller said, even busier than the 1800s. But that  should not be an excuse for us. What really is our priority and what our priorities really are  about? What truly reflects what we truly want to do. If our priorities are that we want like to  watch TV more than walking with God, we will watch TV more than walking with God, and I  can bring this stuff legally, I'm so guilty about it. But that's the truth. If our priority is walking  with God, that is our priority. To understand, make it reproducible. It is better to have the  family open the Word of God and pray for 5-7-10 minutes a day, than to do one hour long  stretch every once in a while but everybody's frustrated. So understand that is more  sustainable to open the Word in your personal life, habitually. 5-10 minutes a day is more  sustainable to journal at a certain time. If you miss it, just do it the next day. All of these are  issues of home discipleship and as a leader, what's your goal is to stay close to the Lord, that  your dialogue with the Lord is happening on a regular basis. It's a relationship. Even when I  talk about this, don't get caught up in the rules of a devotional life. Get caught up in the love,  love over the Lord's you have the love that He has for you how his Holy Spirit is inside of you.  How you are growing and you are reaching others because you are connected to the God of  the universe.