Video Transcript: Communication Objective: Team Building

All right, hope you're ready for the next session hope that it's going well, I want  to encourage you keep going, you can do it. Rah, rah rah. We're in the effective  communication class. And the the objective of communication for this session is  learning how to communicate team building communicate in such a way that  builds teams. There's a paradigm shift in communication, I think, especially if  we're thinking of sermons. But I think it's, it's true in almost every area of  communication, the old paradigm in the past, if I were to use the computer  language, or the internet language, it's down loading people with Down load, I  am the speaker, I'm the one doing the communication. And my job is to  download information to you. You come and I download this thing. So in the  past, sermons were very, you're standing behind a pulpit, it's very formal. All of  you people are sitting in in the pews. And your job is to sit there and listen. And if I were to ask a question, you know, say 50 years ago, everyone understands,  it's just a rhetorical question. I'm not as actually asking a question that I want  you to answer. So it's a very download thing, you come, and I download this  information. In the past, you know, the, the, the, the boss of the company, he  would just download what he wants to do. This is what I want all of you to do.  And now you go do it. I understand that in some cultures, it's still that way. It's  sort of a top down organizational structure in almost any endeavor. And the one  in charge just tells people what he wants them to do. It's a download mentality.  But that has been changing. That was sort of the old paradigm, and maybe  you're still in the culture, or maybe this is still how you operate. But I'm telling  you, it's the old paradigm. And a lot of times, a new paradigm gets started. At the bottom end of the old paradigm, so if you want to get on board with the new  thing, you have to think more team building number two the present. If I want to  use the same computer language, it's uploading. Okay, the old system was  download, you come to me and I download information to you. But now people  are living in an up load. World, Facebook, for example, I don't know if you have  it in your culture, but it's all over the world. People have a Facebook page, and  they upload, they upload a picture of themselves. That's a selfie. They upload  what they did today, or some interesting thing that they came across, I want to  tell you something, people are up loading YouTube, and I made this video and  I'm going to share it with the world. It's upload. So people want to upload more  than they used to. They don't want to just sit there and be downloaded to they  want to be they want to be involved in it. It's more of a team exercise today.  dynamics of the size of the audience. You know, just to illustrate more, this  whole new paradigm, this paradigm shifts in one on one conversation. And this  has always been true in a one on one conversation. If I were to come and have  a conversation with you, and the only thing I do is download. I'm going to do all  the talking. I'm going to inform you of stuff. After five minutes of someone just  talking constantly to you. It gets really awkward. Because in a one on one  situation, that that the feeling or the understanding is that you're gonna say 

something and then I'm gonna say something, and then you're gonna say, and  we're gonna have a conversation. That's how it goes with one on one situations.  That's the expectation. If it doesn't go that way, people start feeling  uncomfortable. Number two, a small group. Maybe you've done small group  Bible studies in a small group Bible study. If someone stood up at the table and  just gave a 20 minute sermon, without anyone saying anything, it would be  really awkward and strange and be like what's going on here? Because when  there's 10 People sitting together in a cozy situation, the idea is that we're going  to have an exchange. You know, maybe I'm the leader, and maybe, you know,  I'm dominating, I'm giving more information than others, because I've prepared  this thing. But I fully expect people to participate. And people expect to  participate. The size of the group just demands, participation. Small church  services. So if you have a small church or 50, 60 people, a person can get away with standing up. And speaking for 20 minutes, because the group is big  enough, where people expect that that might happen. But a lot of times, it's the  prayer time people want to contribute, they want to say something. In a small  church, people want to say more, it's not as it's not threatening to get up and  speak in front of 6, 60 people. So the dynamic of a small group is, is of such  when I planted a church in Vancouver, we started out with 10. And then we had  60 people, when we had 60 people and I had a prayer time, and I will take  prayer requests, and people freely said things, and, and we can manage it. We  weren't so many people that that that we didn't you know that we could manage  the number of requests and people talking and such. But number four large  churches service. So once you get over 100 200 300 people, now, when you  have prayer time, if you open it up, you know, if everyone participated, it would  take forever. And what happens is the people that like to talk in front of 400,  people start dominating the whole thing. And it doesn't really work. So what  happens, as churches get bigger, as the group you're talking to gets bigger, the  more is the expectation that one person is going to do more of the talking and  take more ownership of it. And so that's what's happened. Okay. So the larger  the church, the more formal the situation, the more one person does all the  talking. The smaller the group, the more people expect to contribute to the  conversation. Now, what's happening is that dynamic of uploading, okay, people  are uploading on the internet all the time. And so the expect expectation, or the  desire is to do more uploading, and how does that work in a large church, you  have 400 people you can't have 400 people uploading all the time. So what do  you do? How to approximate the small group dynamic in a large group coming  in communication? People want more of an upload feel to things, but it's hard to  do in a larger group. So how do you? How do you give the illusion or the  approximation of the small thing in the large things and there's ways to  communicate team number one, use informal one on one language. When you  talk one on one with a person, you just use ordinary language, you just talk. You 

don't use big words that people don't understand. I remember my first job as a  youth pastor, I went to this church, and I met in the pastor's office, and he was  like seventy years old. And they were interviewing me for the job. And it was just him and myself and one other person in this office, there's just three of us. And  he stood up, and he prayed, like, there were 3000 people there uses all these  big words. And it was like, thou, Lord, in the kingdoms in the inner, there's just  three of us here. It just felt awkward. Well, if you use big words, and you know,  things that people don't understand, in a large group situation, you're keeping  them at a distance. If you use just ordinary words, you say things like you would, when you're talking to two people, it feels smaller, even though it's a larger  group. Number two, use informal one on one volume and voice inflection. If  you're speaking to a large group, the tendency is to speak like Billy Graham,  welcome, people. God is good. And you know, you're like a politician out there  and shouting and putting your hands up. If you were talking to one person, you  wouldn't be doing that. Hey, how are you today? You just say hey, how are you?  So in the past, you had to do these kinds of things. You know, loud voices. and  so on, because there wasn't a mic system, there wasn't a speaker system. So  you had to project in your had to say things in a particular manner so that people can hear. But now people can hear if you whisper. So talk like you would to one  person, if you talk like, you're talking to one person, it will feel like you're talking  to them. So after a Sunday service, for example, I have people that will come up and say, you were talking right to me. And you know why they feel that way?  Because I was, I wasn't talking to 400 people, I was talking to him and her, I look right at you and say something. Because that's what you would do in an informal conversation. It feels smaller that way. Don't read from a script, look, people in  the eyes, if you're looking and reading your sermon, and then the Lord said this,  and then what we need to do in our marriages is really care. You know, it's,  there's a disconnect, there's like a plate glass between the speaker and the  people. But if you want to communicate to people, you need to look right in the I  need to talk about God in your marriage. The person that you're married to is the most important person in the entire world. And what habits do you have  together, see if I want to say something like that, I going to be looking right at  you. If I was communicating to you, I wouldn't be reading some script. If I had  like three people in a room. I wouldn't be reading this thing with my eyes down.  I'd be looking right at you. Eyes meeting eyes is more informal. Ask questions  ask questions. Not rhetorical questions, but questions you really want someone  to answer. I'll do this in my service all the time. I'll step down from the pulpit  area. And I'll say, you know, why do you think most people don't go to church?  Anyone? See, when I really want someone to answer something, I go anyone?  Hey, I need an answer here. I'm not just asking a rhetorical question. Now,  there's some risk in that because you might have a crazy person who says  something really crazy. And you have to learn how to deal with that. But I ask 

questions, and I want people to answer them. Sometimes I'll say, you know, I'm  going to ask you a question. And I want you to write down the answer. Just write down your answer just real quick, on your bulletin. And then I'll say, who's willing to share what they wrote? I need three people. Because I don't have time for 20  

people. I need three, okay, you okay? How to approximate the small group  dynamic in a large group communication, number five, use group participation  exercises. I want to communicate what faith is. All right. I want all of you to stand up. So everyone stands up. I want you to close your eyes. Everyone closes their eyes. I want you to fold your hands. Everyone fold their hands. Okay, I want you  to sit down into the chair you just stood up from without touching it. And people  with their hands closed, they can't see the chair that they're like, Okay, oh, that  where is it? Exactly. That's hard. Okay. It's hard, even though they know the  chairs there. Again, that's like faith. Faith is, you know, God is there. But your  eyes are closed, and you can't see. And so you sit down, and I said not do it  again. And they do it again. But this time, it's easier. Why? Because they just did it. And they know the chair is there. And that's what faith is like. As you work  your faith. See, I'm getting everyone involved in something, they're doing  something, they're they're feeling like we're in this together. If possible, give free  speech work for your audience to do. So sometimes I'll email everyone. This is  what I want you to bring a rock to church, then I won't, then I'll talk about it. And  then I you know, and then sometimes I give post speech work that requires the  audience to give their feedback at some point, I want you to take this rock, I  want you to put it in your pocket for two weeks. Keep it there. And every time  this particular thing happens, I want you to reach in and grab that rock that will  talk about it in two weeks. Number eight, get people in your audience to  contribute to your speech. Okay, so I talked about my sermon during the week,  and I'm looking for people to share a story. You know, this happened to me, you  know, I read the passage for today because we have we have passages to read  every single day. And this is what happened I went to the hospital and this thing  happened. I say, Could you tell that sorry for our sermon next Sunday. Use  material and or stories of people in your audience that you have gathered ahead of time. There's all the people in your congregation if of all these experiences,  instead of you trying to figure out your own story, and you have all these people  that have stories that have not been told, people are sick of your stories, maybe  let them tell their stories. How to create a sense of team with any  communication. Uss we more than I or you. Hey, what you need to do see, that  separates me from you. What we all need to do see now we're a team. We're in  this together. I'm not telling you what to do. And I'm not saying I think this, don't  we think this isn't this, how most of us operate? Let's be together on this. As I'm  preaching to you, it's not here's what I think I'm telling you. Isn't this what we all  think? Isn't this what you read in your Bible? See, we're in this together? Didn't  we study this together? I'm not the expert downloading to you. We're all experts,

aren't we? And I'm sort of gathering all of this for all of us. Make your challenge  speeches applicable to the whole group. I'm not talking to this 10% of the people I'm talking to the children, I need to say something about, you know, if I'm, if I'm  trying to apply something I talk about, you know, when you're in school, there's  that one guy that no one likes to play with. Maybe it's your role to go and speak  to them, in your marriage, in your family, at your workplace. In the social  situations, you find yourself in your neighborhood, I'm mentioning all these  places. So that you can we're in this together. It's always a community. Make  your conference speeches applicable to the whole group said that make your  encouraging speeches applicable to the whole group. That's what I was just  doing. Team verses, I Corinthians 12:12, 27. Just as a body, though one has  many parts. But all of its many parts form one body, so it is with Christ. Now you  are the body of Christ. And each one of you is a part of it. See, I'm not standing  here, the only guy that reads the Bible and prays to God has relationship with  him, and I'm downloading stuff on you because we're all doing this. The way I  look at my job on Sunday morning with a sermon is I'm the guy who gets to sort  of pull all the parts together. I'm not doing it myself. I'm doing it with you, not to  you. Okay, how do you communicate that? Ephesians 4:11-16. So Christ  Himself gave the apostles the prophets, the evangelists, the pastors and  teachers, why to equip these people for works of service, so that the body of  Christ may be built up until we all reach a unity together in the faith, and in the  knowledge of the Son of God and become mature attaining to the whole  measure of the fullness of Christ, then we will no longer be infants, tossed back  and forth by the waves. Why? Because we're together. Christ, the head, we're  the body, we're not going to be easily pushed around, and blown here there by  every wind of teaching, and by cunning and craftiness of people in the deceitful  scheming. Instead speaking the truth in love, we will grow all this we, we will  grow to become an ever respect, mature of him, who is the head that is Christ  from him, the whole body joined in, held together by every supporting ligament  grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does. Its work. That's the church, each part doing its work. If you're going to lead in church, especially, you need  to communicate that we're in this together. If you're always downloading, I'm the  smart one. I'm going to tell all of you stuff. You're not building the body. You're  separating yourself from the body. Christ is the head, and we all together are the body. I want you to feel like you're a part of this. I am. I'm leading this thing. But  all that means is I have the privilege of gathering all the brilliance in all that God  is doing in each of our lives and pulling it together. The service is the culmination have all the talking and listening to God, all the prayers, all the Bible reading all  the things that happened during the week. It's the culmination of all of us  together walking with God. And we come together, we give praise to God. It's  not a downloading thing. And I think if you took that attitude, everywhere you go, all your relationships, if you go to work, and you're downloading on people they 

resent it, communicate, togetherness to keep communicate, we're in this  together. And we need each other, I have gifts, you have gifts, and all of it  makes it work, communicate in the workplace, communicate it in your social,  social situations, in church, doesn't matter where you are, what you're doing,  communicate this whole idea of being on a team. So my assignment for you  today is to do that. What teams identify the teams in your life and how do you  communicate in such a way that builds the team and not divides the team. We'll  see you next time.