Video Transcript: How to Receive the Gift of Hospitality

Henry - Today we're gonna talk about how to receive the gift of hospitality. So  you're going to someone's house or someone invites you over night, or you're  seeing a few days. And you are now the recipient. And I know that we over the  

years have been the recipient of very kind hospitality from so many people. And  that too is important. Learn how to be a receiver of a fellowship, especially in  this case, hospitality.  

Pam - Because it is part of that. You probably know,  

Henry - first, gracious, receiving  

Pam - Philippians 4:18, I've received full payment and even more, I am amply  supplied now that I have received from Epaphroditus, the gifts you sent, they are fragrant, offering an acceptable sacrifice pleasing to God.  

Henry - Here's the Apostle Paul modeling the gratefulness of being a grateful  recipient of gifts, hospitality, love, and he's just laying that out there. Full he uses that, offering acceptable. I love those  

Pam - attitude of gratitude and just any heartfelt letting them know make people feel  

Henry - special. So let's get down into the nuts and bolts,  

Pam - scheduling per day or overnight visits, confirm the dates and times be  clear about arrival times and departing times.  

Henry - This seems like it should not even be said in many ways. But this is one  of the things that really upsets people who host you. If you don't establish. And  over the years, it's been frustrating when somebody communicate this and plan  plans change, but they didn't communicate a different time. You worried. The  host is worried that something's happened. Did the plane go down? You know,  and we'd have too where, where we'll go to the airport, and the plane was  delayed for like six hours, and the person did not really think to let us know. And  yes we should have checked with the airport to find out before we drove to pick  the person up. Right? So it's our fault. But I'm just saying I want to be I don't  want to like complain about anything. I would love to give hospitality. What I  learned in like, if all of a sudden there is any kind of problem with scheduling.  Let the host be the first to know.  

Pam - I don't know. Plane is delayed or, again, departure 

Henry - times too right away. Let's say you go to someone's house, and you're  gonna be there three days. And now it's two days for whatever reason. It's like,  Oh, I'm so glad to be here. Oh, there was a change in plans. I just found out  instead of being here three days, we're going to be here two days. And we're  going to be heading off to so and so they just say there's a matter of fact,  sometimes I noticed that, that people will sort of not say something because  maybe things will change. But being transparent is the way it would be  

Pam - better to be  

Henry - if you're scheduled for four days or three days, and all sudden you think  to yourself, This is really nice, I think I just want to stay a few extra days. I invite  you don't do that. Don't just all of a sudden say, oh, by the way, can we say two  extra days? On one level, You know, maybe the Holy Spirit will make that  

happen. Like let's say you're at a meeting, and the leader who's the host, wants  you to stay a few extra days initiates the change and you agree, fine. But again,  these are all the way to be a recipient of hospitality is to be very circumspect,  

Pam - and respectful of people's time. Health updates, consider appropriate  actions and travel but communicate it there are problems such as illness or  whatever.  

Henry - Well, I think we're in a much more sensitive area. In I think, by  observation, you come to someone's house, and you are sick, and you were  sick before you left your house. So she got sick on the way there. You know  

Pam - they're kind of stuck,  

Henry - or you have sick children and you don't mention that you have sick  children. All of these things are, I think to be a recipient would be to try to be  sensitive to those the best you can so here's the  

Pam - Being people smart guests. Titus 3:14 Our people must learn to devote  themselves to doing what is good in order that they may provide for daily  necessities and not live unproductive lives.  

Henry - So we were gonna go with things that we talked about before you know  when you go to  

Pam - be quick to listen  

Henry - ask about time boundaries so what is that?

Pam - that would be like are they people early to bed early to rise. Are they night owl we like to sleep in a bit. Find out what their schedule is so you can be  amenable to it and sensitive to  

Henry - it if someone goes to bed at nine o'clock and you go to bed at midnight  know that they're tired and their whole clock is turning around in the cloud or  visit or go somewhere else just be quiet when you come in be very respectful of  your time boundaries  

Pam - discern for the appropriate time with host for arrival and and and  bedtimes and dinner Dinner and all that kind of stuff that matters  

Henry - and here's some too even the amount of time like some people come  and the host really is a very busy for the host feel like they've got to bring them  to someplace you know, tourist site and this tourist site but they really have time  and the expectation of the person coming over just thinking that they were really loved to see this. Be sensitive  

Pam - to their time constraints if they have some that  

Henry – Let them suggest, hey, I would love to take you to the beach. But the  evening there is this in a sense, we have enough people smart right? Sensitivity  there  

Pam - manners, of course good manners.  

Henry – Do you even know what today's manners are? Those are the questions  that a lot of people don't know. 

Pam - good manners is showing respect and  

Henry - table with their mouth. Someone close manners, maybe we should do  like a mini course on manners. I think that that's a very appropriate teacher  children how to have manners.  

Pam - Be early or on time to appointments. Right? Coming late, that shows  disrespect for their time and that they're waiting for you. Be clear about any  allergies before you arrive. Food wise or put the 

Henry – That is very frustrating. The host is working on all this food. Welcome.  We made pizza tonight. And then you say I'm dairy and gluten allergy I can't  have any pizza and then also may feel uncomfortable.  

Pam - Definitely let them know. Eat what is put before you when offered and do  not eat on your own schedule of eating as expected. So don't have some big  snack right before they're serving dinner.  

Henry – I remember one time, you had your meal plan that was really special.  You worked on a friend and one of our kids. We're all excited and everything.  And then we made it clear that we're eating right. It was really clear and that  person said oh no, I  

Pam – I had a late lunch with my brother work coworkers stopped he was like  

Henry - my mind was trying to like, that's fine. We don't have to be eaten with  but we don't want you're putting somebody through that effort and work and it's  disrespectful. To try a ministry person to be very respectful.  

Pam - Helpful guests offer to help before and during mealtime. You could set the table chop veggies, clear the table and help load the dishwasher if appropriate.  Your host is comfortable with a host or hostess is comfortable with modest  lifestyle with visiting night clothes consideration. If you're staying overnight,  nothing inappropriate modesty drinking, eating, coming to the guest home  modestly appropriate, appropriate, respectful  

Henry - and also too, you know, over the years. You know, we've been in some  of the various situations where we've been hosted by someone and we've  hosted people. It is surprising how, when someone lacks a modesty, how  frustrating that can be for the host. Right? Even though I've always find  somebody is not modest. And so what is modesty? Modesty is really for you to  prayerfully decide in your particular culture. But whatever that is, really seek to  learn it. Do that. In here the example too is we've had it before we're  somebody's playing loud music or changing the music that we're playing, or just  assumed I want to listen to that person right now. It's like, well, what happens if  we don't like that kind of music?  

Pam - Right? There could be a way to say, Hey, have you ever heard this  person before? You know, there's ways to approach that if you're right, if you're  wanting to introduce them to something that you enjoy sharing different  attitudes. Cleanliness, when visiting areas you are using, keep clean and tidy.  Keep your stuff out of the common areas, make your bed every morning and 

your children's beds, or have your children make their bed. When you clean your bathroom back in your room and take the sheets off your bed, grab the towels  and take them to the laundry room.  

Henry - clean someone's bathroom? Early on anything we've ever done sort of  doing but we have adopted that practice and at least ask your host. You know, if  you have cleaning supplies, we'd love to clean the bathroom and if you have a  vacuum? And then when they say no, no, thank you, well, I'll take care of it. You  know what you communicate to that person? Like, wow, that person really loves, right? They'll clean up their own bathroom. While they're visiting. I would love to  have that person again. And that person is a contributor. What a pleasure. You  know, in some ways, when we talk about these things, it almost makes it more  of a hassle. Just miles we'll get our hotel. They will pay for maid service, they  pay for all of that other stuff. But there is great opportunity when you receive  hospitality. Especially  

Pam - refreshing with another person and you offer the opportunity for that  person to refresh you. Right.  

Henry - Evangelistically, we have gone to people's houses, people who are not  believers, and you have that beautiful proximity. If you're really like being clean  and clean, the bathroom and all that you speak well of what a Christian leader is like so you get an opportunity to not only share while you're talking with each  other, but you also have that person  

Pam - you realize how much work it is for them to get ready for you in the first  place. Bring a gift or leave a heartfelt card or both. Show you Thanksgiving  follow up send a handwritten thank you note mentioned the details of the time  together the food and the adventurers thanked them for their time, their  hospitality and the use of their homr. 

Henry – Such a beautiful thing. So to receive hospitality to receive the gifts of  others, that passage that Paul earlier said that he says he saw in his writing the  gratitude. And I believe that that's really the key message here. If you will clean  your own bathroom you're showing gratitude If you will honor their music  preferences, if they are stereo or stereo like  

Pam - so many different ways that music can be played now,  

Henry - if you will honor who they are, and be a contributor and the time you're  there, which you are being their own. So, you want to keep your own home  clean, you want to keep your own home tidy, you want to be people who have 

good boundaries in your own home to honor someone else's boundaries. That's  a powerful witness. So if you look back at all the places we've we've stayed, and all the hosts that are hosted us. What were some of the experiences. In just a  couple of minutes we have left that you would say, struck you in those moments  of receiving hospitality and while you're thinking about mentioned one, you  know, for me, I love some of the conversations. The different you know, the  conversations of people I didn't know and then when you're actually forced to be with them, because they've invited you to say yes to talk. And I've learned some  incredible things. Does anything come to mind? From the blessing of receiving  hospitality?  

Pam - Like think staying with someone, you do get to know them on a deeper  different level than you know, just you're even meeting in a restaurant or  whatever, and then you know, they've opened up their home to you. In special,  

Henry - special and you often form lifelong relationships. So it matters to receive hospitality. Not just go to the hotel. Just receive hospitality and see what God  does when you receive and are grateful for that.