Video Transcript: What about Accountability Questions?
We are back. And now we're going to talk about accountability Bible study, right? And as we go through this, we're going to go through some basic accountability questions. You can make your whole bible study about this. So it's an accountability group. Or you can add accountability questions to your Bible study, regardless of what track you're following. Right? Yeah, I went, you know, we're gonna go through 20 questions, or when, ask all 20 questions, every time you meet, you might take one, you might cycle through some of these if you're doing that concept of like, sort of a life coach minister that your keeping goals before people, and you're not telling them the goal they should do. Putting on them to think about. So Hebrews 10:24-25, and let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Now spurring, I don't always like to get spurred the analogy here is, you know, you're riding a horse and to get the horse going, and the little pointy things here you kick him in the side. And off you go, it's sort of a challenge, I guess. It's really challenged Well, inertia is to just stay put, don't grow with God. Right. So the mother eagle, kicks the eagle out at some point, like you got to learn how to fly. So we need a little bit of spurring in our lives. Not giving up meeting together as some are in the habit of doing so the habit of because the default setting is to isolate, right, because study to learn it. I forgot about it. And now, I was gonna go with someone you know. So it's like, always, we lot of times, we want to be free to do whatever. But when we're free to do whatever, our lives become a mess, right? We do nothing or we're into trouble or idle. And we need we need to meet together in this small groups. This is church services. If someone once told me this illustration, is that okay? You have a fire. And then you take one of the embers and you move with a foot away from the fire. What happens there? Yeah, it goes out. So we need the connection to other people. So we need their challenge. Okay, and some are in the habit of doing but encouraging one another and all the more as you see the day approaching. So both of those things, we need to challenge. And we need encouragement. And the following questions that we're going to look at are some good questions that you can ask in a Bible study. Or even if you just had an accountability group, right, so these are tools for you all to do well in no matter what type of Bible study or you can just do this alone. But we're saying is kind of neat if you pick a Bible study method and then salt and pepper it with a little accountability. Okay, so let's look. So here we go. Number one. What are the greatest challenges you have been experiencing? What are the greatest joys? Okay, that's on the . Do you remember when we did the serendipity Bible. Yes. I, this reminds me the great benefits that we had, in the serendipity Bible where it had the Bible passage, they had really all these like, being accountability questions that went along with it. Sort of that style. So what are the greatest challenges? Henry, what challenges you face? Well, my some of my biggest challenges right now our personal, family. CLI is Is there going to be a free ministry training option for the world? And will it be supported by those
who participate with it? And will it be sustainable beyond our generation into the next generation in Abby's generation, and that next I mean, to me the big challenge of being our age, is passing the baton on to the next generation. And that is, I feel that perfectly. You have this pretty grand challenge. Yeah. I'm thinking about it. And now the greatest joy are the incredible impact. Well, we had a conference a couple of weeks ago and testimony after testimony. Well, people are doing so it can be a grand thing. It might be a little thing like one challenge that I have is doing this class. You know, we came in here after someone had done some of it. And we got about halfway through the last presentation and we realized it wasn't recorded because the thing wasn't attached so little things that happened. Exactly. It's amazing. All right, number two, how is your walk with God been since we last met? have you been experiencing the abundant life experiences present drawing on his wisdom and strength? So now, this question is because you can go to a Bible study, we mentioned this last session. You can go to a Bible study and learn about Galatians or whatever book you're studying, and never have a walk with God. And there's no the often authentic discussions. I've had it in the early ministry, where we've been doing Bible studies. And, and we will be doing on these Bible Steve, And in under our nose, it was somewhat absolute far from God and struggling like ever. But when we talked about the topic, that person looked at that they were all together, but they were not all together. I remember when we first started out with the serendipity Bible, we had a group meeting and we had a study, and this person's husband didn't come. And so we're trying to hold them, where is he? Well, we started asking him, Well, how's your Bible reading going in your personal life in your marriage, and all of a sudden, she just burst into tears? My husband's back on cocaine? Yeah. It's like so in yet, and that happened for a while, so she had been coming. It looked like she was put together but the truth was, right. She wasn't until we faced some of these accountability questions. That's powerful. Right? Number three, have you been spending consistent time with God on a regular basis in prayer and Bible reading? Have you? What have you gained in this time? How is God speaking to you? What are you reading and studying, in addition to your quiet time, that is deepening your relationship with God? So I'm reading a book on John Calvin right now, really, by Thea B, Van Halsema, This Was John Calvin, and she goes into his personal life. John Calvin is known for his Institute's theology very deep. But most people don't know the struggle that he had in his life and how faithful he was in his marriage and family and the city that wanted to put them under. And I mean, it was just reading about his personal life really, you know, helped me feel some of the things that he would say in his theology books. So that's what if someone asked me that question, it gives me a chance. This is what I'm doing. Now. Other people are listening going what am I reading, I'm not reading anything, doing anything. And then they might, they might feel challenged. But
when you said that I'm like, dug in right now on the early church. That's my sort of my theological. But then I'm reading books. We just went through the Madness of Crowds written by a gay atheist. And it challenged us are really in in the whole time, we're talking about the Lord, we're talking about what's being said, and all of these things here in that critical grace theory class came out of that whole journey. But we're, what the Word of God say, how does that all work? It means in some ways, it's that question, How is God speaking to you? And when you have that accountability, in the sense, you and I and our wives, now for years have had a small group going, and we ask these questions every week. So many of you would not want to be in our group. Like, but you know, a lot of times we love those two, sometimes it's challenging, right? Right. Okay, you're gonna challenge me, am I in my walking with God, I? Well, I didn't do it at all last week. And it feels kind of heavy, because you're challenging me. But it's also encouraging. Because it gives you a chance to share some of the things that God is doing in your life if God just did some incredible thing. We have nowhere to go with it. Now all of a sudden, the group is coming to you and saying, Well tell us all about it. And we want to hear what God is doing. So it's very encouraging to have a group of people that actually cares what you think. One thing that happened last week that we were getting spiritually attacked last week, I missed it overnight. And we had this day where everything went wrong here at Christian leaders Institute I mean, everything I mean, even a ladder fell on Steve. It was really bad. And there was a problem with the taping that we could not figure out and and it was like, after Mitch left, three o'clock he was working all day. We just after dinner, we just kept fighting the fight and fight and fight him around quarter to nine. He figured some fix and we still don't know why it works. But it works. But then that night after we actually did a few tapings. Okay, so then we were sort of winding down and then we are sharing YouTube videos with each other, that meant a lot of spiritual, different people's songs, different songs were why they made a difference. You know? It's an encouraging time. Number four, in what ways have you stepped out in faith? Since we last met, given your testimony or sense God's activity? Powerful question, we've got to keep going, or else we're gonna make it too long. Number five, what has been your greatest disappointment? Since we last met? And how have you handled it? Maybe it's something in your personal life, maybe at some point in your marriage? Maybe it's something at work. But, but do people have these kinds of things happen in a week? All they do, and, and I think too, sometimes, we first start these types of groups. People are much more safe. Like, they'll say things like, you know, I'm finding that my quiet time is not what I want it to be. And then they'll come after they get to know you a little bit. They're like, you know, I only read the Bible once last week. Okay, now they're telling you more, but then they'll even get into it right now. Dinner, or God, I don't want to hear it. I don't want to hear it right? Or I'm afraid. All of these things start coming. It's just really
powerful. To get that group now, we always like to say the downside. Be careful, you can use such a closed group, they are a closed group, and you never know. So while these accountability questions are there, always be mindful of the fact. You know, it's like sometimes we've had this thing golf where we play with
buddies and tell every story about every golf course they ever played before we ever were members of the club, are members of the kind of golf. Okay, because then it's like, oh, you know, everybody likes a story because they have this shared experience. So, and that is probably and just sort of introducing this now in the middle randomly. But as you do accountability, always be aware that not everybody will have the same level of trauma, right? And we'll talk more about how you handle some people will want to dominate if this kind of thing, right? They want to turn your group into their personal counseling. We're gonna get to that and so we'll talk all about how to manage that. All right, number six. Is there any hatred, bitterness, spite, resentment or unforgiveness in your heart toward another person? Have you gossiped about any person or situation? Like, no not me. No way. I mean, maybe you but sometimes when we catch each other gossiping about something we'll always set one of us will say that's not going to play well on the big screen. We do. Okay. Number seven. How have you managed your tongue? Right? Really sharp, unkind has said things you should not have said to anyone? Have you used language that is inappropriate swearing laughing at inappropriate jokes? Have you compromise your integrity in any way by your speech? Okay, we're going to come back to that. How do you serve others since we last met? What were your motives and attitudes and serving so yesterday? Bunch of us pickleball people, there's a guy who got ALS, like three years ago, and now he's in a wheelchair. And we all went over there and we honked our horns, had gifts and what have you so number nine, have you procrastinated on important things in your daily life and spiritual walk that should not be put off? Right? Number 10. Can you get a picture here? How are you spending too much time at work? Or another activities at expense of your family others and your spiritual life? Have you been spending good quality, quantity and quality time with your spouse, children mother or father? What have you done since we last met to enhance your relationships? Are you praying together? See, see all these questions are just general right? How's it going in the family? How's it going in your marriage? How's it going? And these are the things that people don't ask. Right? Number 12 Are you giving to the Lord's work financially? Have you miss used your finances by buying things you don't need at the expense of your tithe or other responsibilities? Number 13. And have you access access internet sites watch movies or television which are inappropriate that would have grieved, the Holy Spirit had had a negative impact on someone else detracted from your testimony or hindered your spiritual walk? This is probably a big one, right? Bigger than probably we all would imagine. So, here's the problem. Sometimes questions is so personal. In know, some people
may sort of answer, but there's a hint of an answer. And then as a leader, you might want to pursue it. But maybe you don't, because this isn't a group of 10. And all of a sudden, it's getting way more personal for the group of 10. And maybe the group of two would be better. So that's where a little bit of discernment as you as a leader, you might say, Hey, Bob, thanks for sharing. And then afterwards, you say, Hey, Bob, let's go out to dinner, and we'll have a little coffee someplace. We'll talk about these things. Because not everything is maybe for the whole group. I think sometimes there's even the gender group of men. Yeah. And you guys know each other question that should be regularly asked, Is anybody visiting a porn site? But Is anybody visiting? I mean, because there are gender sins that are more appropriate. And to get to that place where there's clarity about that, and trust in, you know, in the fact that when in our world where it's very private internet, you're alone. In whether it's men or whether it's women, there is the devil is there doing what the devil does to try to do isolate like the lone wildebeest get attacked by the roaring lions? And but if you can be together on this, and help? Well, you will, you'll be totally perfect on everything? Probably not. But to be in a group and keep these questions is huge, huge. So some of these questions are really designed for a real accountability to rise might be only like three people and as related to this one, too. Right? So have you committed any sexual sin? In your head improper thoughts about the opposite sex as your thought life in pure? Are you wrestling with any sexual sin temptation? Have you put yourself in an awkward situation with the opposite sex, right in some of these things to also are changing? We have different manifestations of sexual sins coming today, you know, same sex understandings and everything where, you know, we have a very fragmented world. And we have mini class on what does the Bible Teach About Sex God. And I just got done editing, and that's going to be you by your watching this. But it doesn't really bring a lot of those questions. God's designed, and the questions are kinda a lot longer ones are very important. Now you can see some of these questions are extremely personal. And these might not be the ones that you would throw into a group of 10 if you're meeting with a mixed group, husbands and wives, right. So these might be a little to me, and what husband's gonna say, Yeah, I'm struggling with porn right now, he's not even said that to his wife, sitting there in this group. So if you have an accountability group of like, one or two of same sex, that decide, hey, I need to be, then it's totally appropriate. There's a lot of trust that's been built up among three, and then someone might be willing to do this. So you can see some of these questions might apply to a group of 10. Right. But other others probably is a group of two or three, or even personally, I think we pick on the sexual thing, because the way everything is so set up really leads to a lot of problems. People are not getting married, when they're young anymore, whereas now people are getting married older, I think that the internet, so forth, but there's also these
accountability questions can be put in all the seven deadly sins, you know, has there been any gluttony? How are you doing on that? Is your lust for food growing or for you know, you can go you can do the same thing about money. Have you been, you know, like, in certain traditions, you can, like be greedy and that can look like thrift, right, so, all of these topics, of the machinations of the human heart can be put into, like, the Bible study in Florida. There's a lot of businessmen there. So they have to be reminded about, you know, greedy motives, right. Okay, number 15. Have you used or abused any substance as an escape instead of casting all your cares upon the Lord? Cigarettes, food, alcohol, drugs, etc. Excessive caffein Some of the things you already mentioned 16 Are you taking time to exercise your body? Are you eating? Are you your eating habits healthy? Are you taking time for rest and relaxation? Is there excessive stress in your life? And how are you handling? 17? Is there anything you are hiding or something else you need to be accountable for which I did not ask you. So letting people write their own accountability question. 18 Overall, does the external you and the internal you match? Are you leaving? Are you leading with your life? In other words? Are you you're projecting one thing, but is that a reality? Are you hiding things? And I think that that's really a good point, I would rather be the transparent person who who I am as who I am between before you and God, than to be phony baloney. In fact, one thing probably nice about having 30 plus years of accountability with you is I don't think there's very much that we can baloney. I think that's insane with our wives. And you know, like, I would rather know, my wife struggles in hers, even the sword worst of them, tend to live life alone in some hiding place where you're projecting one thing, and there's an aspect of your life that is hidden apart from you, I think in the end of the day, you know, we all have a journey, but I want to walk with somebody in that journey rather than trying to figure it out alone. Right? Good point. All right, number 19, There's 19. Here, we're still going? What is your, what is your number one need in the coming week? And how can I pray for you? bringing back that we're not landing the plane again, we go flying. Have you spent time with or talk with anybody that could have been misinterpreted as something unholy? Have you endeavored to avoid the appearance of evil? All of these things are? So you can actually write your own. These are, in a way starter questions. And of course, you wouldn't ask all these questions it would be a five hour meeting. So you pick and choose what you're going to answer. And sometimes you can let people in the group decide on what they're working on. Right? You know, what do you want to be held accountable for? Well, I'm trying to lose weight, I'm trying to, I have a habit of swearing. And I just want to get rid of it. I was raised with it. And this is what I do, I don't want to do it. But I'm stuck doing it as though this is what I want to work in or, or someone's struggling to actually read the Bible or be or whatever it might be. And then as a leader, you'd write these things down and then make sure that you hold them accountable
and holding accountable is not just challenging. Did you do this? Or did you not do this? No, it's celebrating this week? Great job. That's three more times than you did last week. I know your goal was seven, but you did three in the week before you did zero. So good job, you're on the right track. So that I think that part part of grace is really important and encouragement because we have phrases of all worse than we originally thought over 30 years. We have other things we think about the grace is, like the devil gets in there when someone gets so beaten down, and they just whatever, I don't care Exactly. Yeah, the other thing I notice about these questions, is the theological concept of what do you say from and where's Jesus Lord in your life? Or where do you need to be Lord of your life more? So in a sense, we have powerful theological like, if we reflect on some passages from like the apostle Paul, the apostle Paul transparently said that he has a thorn in the flesh, a messenger of Satan. And then he says, When I am weak then I am strong. But is that transparency, that were the power and the weakness? We don't have, we have not arrived, that we do hunger for heaven, we hunger for the Lordship of Christ, not to make us feel guilty about something but to make us whole. And we have no, we have no shame in this new garden of Eden redemption, where we can come out of the bushes, and not feel naked even though some of the acts that we do that reflects the old clothes. We want to take them off and get to where Christ is the hope of glory. So you absolutely need a sense of grace in the group or no one's going to admit anything right right you're not going to be able to hold anyone accountable for anything, right because it's not a safe place for them to be one more thing as as you're in The training here, one of the things we really like about the licensed clergy is confidentiality that you have that you're expected to, but it's a good standard. So a lot of these questions are really sort of one on one questions. Steve mentioned here. Ooh, there's a one on one moment here. And there's where, like, I've done that, like, you know, as a minister, I'm I, you know, I have confidentiality in here. I just say that. I heard you mention sort of a struggle. You want to go further with that? No, that is just between God you and I. And in the weekend, this confidentiality thing as a minister and even in a group, a group of 10 be one of the rules. What we say in this group stays in this group unless someone wants others to know right, so let's call it level of confidentiality and group level. But there is a higher standard on you as a minister. In fact, you need to get in many places. You will you are not expected to testify against somebody in court. If the parishioner came to you and said that they're coming to you in confidentiality to confess a sin and everything, you cannot be put on trial to incriminate the person. But I think that's awesome responsibility. And we have that at the Christian leaders alliance in the ordination process. This isn't some ordination get in the mail or whatever it is a process and then you are expected to be held to that. Alright, very good till next time