Determining Compatability

Creating a curriculum designed for couples to determine their compatibility is a valuable tool for a Romance Officiant. This structured program combines activities, discussions, and reflections tailored to deepen understanding, address potential conflicts, and evaluate their readiness for a long-term commitment. Here's a detailed curriculum outline that Romance Officiants can use to guide couples through this critical relationship phase.

Spiritual Beliefs and Practices

• Objective: Understand and respect each other's spiritual beliefs and practices.
• Activities:
• Discuss individual spiritual beliefs and their role in each partner's life.
• Attend a service chosen by each partner.
• Reflection:
• Reflect on the role of faith in the relationship and how it can be nurtured together.

Understanding Individual Values and Beliefs

• Objective: Identify and share core personal values and beliefs.
• Activities:
• Each partner completes a values inventory.
• Discussion session to share and explore these values with each other.
• Reflection:
• Write a reflection on what was learned about the partner's values and how they align.

Communication Skills and Navigating Conflict

• Objective: Enhance communication skills and learn conflict resolution techniques.
• Activities:
• Workshop on effective communication strategies, including active listening and "I" statements.
• Role-play common conflicts and practice resolution strategies.
• Reflection:
• Journal about a past conflict and how it could have been handled differently with these new tools.

Family Backgrounds and Expectations

• Objective: Understand the impact of family backgrounds on relationship expectations.
• Activities:
• Share family histories and discuss their influence on personal expectations about relationships.
• Complete a questionnaire on expectations for future family life.
• Reflection:
• Reflect on how each partner's family background influences their vision for their future together.

Discussing Finances

• Objective: Navigate financial planning and management as a couple.
• Activities:
• Financial planning workshop focusing on budgeting, savings, and financial goals.
• Discussion on financial expectations, responsibilities, and dealing with debt.
• Reflection:
• Each partner outlines their financial goals for the next five years and discusses how to achieve them together.

Lifestyle and Leisure

• Objective: Explore compatibility in lifestyle preferences and leisure activities.
• Activities:
• Share personal hobbies and interests and participate in one activity chosen by each partner.
• Determine which activities could be done together and which will be separate.
• Discuss lifestyle preferences, including diet, health, and fitness.
• Reflection:
• Reflect on the experience of engaging in each other's hobbies and how lifestyle preferences align.

Future Plans and Goals

• Objective: Align on future goals, including career, family, and personal growth.
• Activities:
• Goal-setting workshop to identify and share individual and collective goals.
• Create a vision board that represents shared future aspirations.
• Reflection:
• Partners write letters to each other expressing where they see themselves as a couple in 10 years.

Intimacy and Physical Connection

• Objective: Discuss expectations and boundaries around physical intimacy.
• Activities:
• Take a course at the Christian Leaders Institute or attend a workshop or seminar on maintaining intimacy and connection.
• Private discussion on comfort levels, boundaries, and expectations regarding intimacy.
• Reflection:
• Journal privately about feelings on intimacy and share any important insights with your partner.

Addressing Deal Breakers

• Objective: Identify and discuss any potential deal breakers in the relationship.
• Activities:
• Complete and discuss a "deal breakers" questionnaire.
• Workshop on managing and negotiating relationship deal breakers.
• Reflection:
• Reflect on any concerns raised during the discussion and plan for addressing them.

Making Commitments

• Objective: Evaluate readiness for a long-term commitment or engagement.
• Activities:
• Couples counseling session to review progress and address any lingering concerns.
• Discuss the next steps and make commitments if ready.
• Reflection:
• Write a commitment letter to each other (whether to continue dating, become engaged, or another agreed-upon commitment).

This curriculum is designed to be flexible, allowing the Romance Officiant to tailor the content to meet each couple's unique needs. The goal is to equip partners with the knowledge, skills, and understanding to make informed decisions about their future, fostering a strong, healthy, and lasting relationship.