Video Transcript: The Cry For Spiritual Fathers and Mothers: Chapter 10 Let’s Get Practical
A few years ago, I was on a flight to Seattle, Washington, flying from the East Coast, and I remember sitting with a sitting with a gentleman, and he asked me what I do? And I said, Well, I'm involved in Christian leadership training. And trained, you know, trained Christian leaders on mentoring and coaching, discipleship, and I forget how I which words I use, but he said, That's intriguing. He said, Let me tell you something. He said, I'm involved in a very large airplane building company. And he didn't say the name of it. I think I know. And as I remember, he said, we learned something really interesting in our corporation, is I'm in high level management. He said, we realize we lost a whole generation of brain trust. He says, so we made a decision that from now on, no one will continue to step up to other levels of leadership in our organization unless they're coaching, mentoring the next generation. But isn't that interesting? Even in the world system, in the business community, we have those who understand fathering and mentoring and coaching and discipleship. How much more is important that we get this truth really worked out in our lives, practically in the kingdom of God. So as you're planting a house church, as you're helping somebody else plant a house church, we want to talk practically about, how do we actually mentor individuals? Again, if you're a house church leader, your responsibility is not to mentor everyone. Your responsibility is to work with others mentor a few. Who can mentor a few can mentor a few. So we continue to see people learn how to practically see spiritual parenting work out. So the first thing I would like to say is that we have to understand there's this, this process called multiplication. In the Bible, reproduction. You know, you know, for example, when Jesus gave the parable the store, the fourth type of soil was the 30, 60, 100 fold. So that's how God thinks multiplication. So we should expect it to happen. And so we think in terms of future generations making decisions is not just how we think today, it's how we think next generation. And I'm 66, years of age, so I'm thinking in the dove international ministry that I'm privileged to lead with a group of wonderful men and women of God. I'm thinking, well, there needs to be some time we start preparing another generation take our place. We call that succession from thinking future generation, picking decisions made today. How would that affect the next generation? I want to make sure that whatever we set up today makes it better and easier for the next generation. That's what it's about. When we stop thinking about ourselves, we think about future generation, and we think of the kingdom of God is the kingdom of God is a family of families of families of families to see the kingdom of God advance throughout the world. So multiplication literally means to increase by number. And since we are spiritual fathers and mothers to others, we're being fathered and mothered in a perfect world. The same time it can all happen. The same time we can see many spiritual fathers and others release. So I like to get really practical with you in this session, this session, the next session. It very practical. How does this actually work practically? First of all, you've got to know who
you're called to be in relationship with. And I want you to know and that God's going to put you with people, where there's grace, where there's joy, if you have a check and a concern. You know, everyone who comes to you and might say, Could you mentor me? You need to pray. Maybe you should. Maybe you should not. You know, people ask me, What does a son come to the Father come to say? It can work either way. You know, the Scripture we've we've mentioned various times in these classes, Malachi 4, God will turn the hearts of the fathers to the children. So fathers are thinking that to the children, Jesus chose the 12. And yet there's a sense of it's great if a son can go to a potential, son can go to a father. Now it doesn't mean if you're looking for someone to be a spiritual father. I just want to say to you, it doesn't mean just because you have that desire for a certain person to Father, it doesn't mean that they are called to do that. You have to guard your heart and that fear rejection. It might say, well, they may help you find someone, but I don't think this season my life and I'm the one to do that. It's okay, but God's going to push it together. We simply take steps of faith, and God puts it together, but we've got to be committed to their success. So the bottom line is, be available as God leads you intentionally go back your can. It doesn't just happen. And the desire of a mentor, a father, mother in the Lord is it to come out a deep and passionate love relationship with Jesus. And that spoils over the spills over, rather into our mentoring relationships. Okay, here's three keys to look at. The first key to father and mother relationships is initiating relationship. I'm going to tell you how to do that from Scripture. The second is building relationship, how to encourage people and how we walk through the process. The third is releasing them to do. The same thing. So initiating relationship, building relationship, and releasing them to do the same thing. Let's start with initiating the relationship. Jesus initiated relationship with His disciples. We see that in Luke 5, you want to grab your Bibles, turn to Luke 5. I'll show you from Scripture how Jesus actually did this in Luke 5, starting in verse 4, Jesus had been preaching on the boat to all the disciples that were next to the lake of Gennesaret. And he sat down, he taught the people. When he had finished verse 4, he said to Simon, Peter, he said, put out in the deep water and let down the nets for a catch. And Simon answered, Master, we worked hard all night. Haven't caught anything. In other words, we did that, but he said, but because you say so, I'll let down my nets. I want you to know there are times that you may not feel like doing something. I've tried that hasn't worked, but if God is impressed on you, if God says so, we want to do it anyway, because if God says it's going to work. And so Simon did that, and when they had done so, they caught such a large number of fish that their nets began to break, and they signaled their partners in the other boat to come and help them. And they came and filled both boats with so full they began to sink. So here's what happened, Jesus shows up, and there's a miracle all these fish. And you know, Simon said, We fish all night. There's no fish here. But it really happened. It didn't make
sense. You know, which side of the boat the nets on didn't make sense, naturally. But God was in this. I mean, Simon Peter saw the miracle. He said this in verse 8, he fell Jesus knees. He said, Go away from me, Lord. I'm a sinful man. The fear of God was on him. And so he and all his companions were astonished, and all the fish they had taken. And so were James and John, the sons of Zebedee Simon's partners. And then Jesus said to Simon, don't be afraid. From now on, you will catch men. So he said, Well, I'm calling you different kind of fishing. I remember I grew up with this little song I learned we should be fishers of men. That's where it came from, right here. And so they pulled up there. Their boats on the shore. They left everything and followed Jesus. So what happened here? Jesus was building friendships. He said, Come follow me. See what happened. You read the rest of this chapter, and you'll find Levi, for example, in verse 29 you know, had a great banquet for Jesus at his house. And this, this crowd came, and you find, as you go through, as you go throughout these various scriptures, Jesus was just gleaning Friends. Friends were coming, and they were joining him. Now the why do I share this with you? Because probably the person, or persons God's called you to be a spiritual father mother to are probably people in your life right now. They may not be, maybe it'll be a new relationship, but they could be people in your life right now. And by the way, people say, can you be a spiritual father to someone who's not a Christian? Sure, you can. You're building a relationship, and you're helping them. They're pre Christians. They're not quite in the kingdom. They're just helping them walk through that process where they can become Christians and they can walk with Jesus in the kingdom of God. So we have Jesus with all these disciples. There was at least 70, could have been 120 were not exactly sure how many, but he had just had a bunch of acquaintances. He had a bunch of friends now. So Jesus can't this company of people to choose from, to pick his disciples, to pick those that he'd be in relationship with, those very close relationship, John, then fairly close, James, Peter, and obviously John, and then the next 9 to 12, and then the 70, and then, of course, 120 and on or on. So there are levels of relationship. Remember that there are levels of relation. You will not have the same relationship with everyone. Some will be closer than others, and you need to hear from God about that. And that net be feel coerced to say, I've got to have a close relationship with this person, because they want that. They need really listen to God about that. As we need people to help us, and we need spiritual overseers in our lives and others who can help us walk through these processes. Now, when you turn to the next chapter, you see something very interesting. And by the way, what kind of people do we look for, sons and daughters? Well, we, I think we look for faithful people. You know, Paul said that II Timothy 2 to find faithful men. He told Timothy that I think we look for reliable people. He said in the same scripture, either by those who reliable, we find people with a servant heart. I love to watch people, but I find somebody with
a servant heart that goes a long way in my life toward the kind of person I would love to help, and I love to mentor. We need to find those who honor fathers and mothers. And the Bible is clear. Ephesians 6:1-3. If we honor a Father Mother, will, you know, will live long in the earth that can be natural and spiritually. Now, new believer may not have these qualities yet, and that's fine, but we take those that Father gives us those that we feel he's brought into our lives. So we've all these friends, but now, how do we choose one or two or three, or however, many of our friends? Let's just do what Jesus did. Well, Luke 6, what did he do? Verse 12, one of those days, Jesus went out to a mountainside to pray. He spent the whole night praying to God. So he prayed. He prayed to a. Lord, Who you calling me to really pour my life into? And they says, When morning came, he calls disciples to Him as to 70 or 120 or however many. And he chose 12. Says, 12 of them. He designated them apostles, which is amazing. And we know that names of them are right there in Scripture, Peter and and Andrew and James, John, on and on, even Judas Iscariot, who betrayed him and and obviously lost his life, took his own life. I mean, and Bible says he had a demon, even him. I don't understand all that, but I want you know there might be people that God asks you to mentors for a short season. They might go through hard times, and we don't know that. I wish I could say it's all perfect. It's not, but it is, is the way Jesus called us to build His kingdom by being spiritual fathers and mothers. Now let me say something important about this relationship. If you ask someone, and again, don't tell someone, I want to be your father. You know, you simply say, Could I You're in my heart. I love to, I love to spend some time with you, maybe once a month. We can just have a cup of coffee and talk, and if I obviously want to be here for you, you know, if you know, I've never asked anyone to say, I want to be your spiritual father. I've never done that. I have met with people and care, but many have said, Larry, you've been like a father to me, there's not something that we try to force some people. Is something we allow the Holy Spirit to build together a relationship with us, but the relationship must be mutual. Amos 3:3, two walk together unless they've agreed to do so. So it must be a mutual relationship, and love is a pivotal point of the relationship. And I mean, the people that I have mentored over the years are my friends, even today, and I've it again. It can be short term. It can be long term. It can be for six months. It can be a new believer. It can be somebody involved in the business you're with. Maybe somebody's gonna be involved in your house church or whatever kind of church that God calls you to, you're involved in. But even if you think it's long term, start short term, say, we do this for three months or six months or for a year, now, We'll reevaluate. And maybe there's somebody else again can can help you more than I can, and you still have a sense of inheritance, because you've taken time to pour your life into their lives. So the first thing we do is we initiate the relationship. Is probably through people that are in our lives now or soon will be in our lives, our lives soon. The second thing
is, we build the relationship. And how do we do that? Look at chapter 6, and then let's look at verse 17. Now, what did Jesus do after he chose these disciples? Verse 17 says he went down with them. I circled up my Bible with them. Stood in a level place a large crowd of disciples. Was there a great number of people from all over Judea and Jerusalem, East and from the coast of Tyre and Sidon, who had come to hear him and be healed of their diseases. Those troubled by evil spirits were cured. People all tried to touch him because power was coming out of amazing he took them with us. They just watch see what I do. And then, looking at his disciples, he said, See, he went back to his disciples. He said see what's going on here. He said, Blessed are you who are poor for yours the kingdom of God, or Blessed are the poor in spirit, for they received the kingdom of God? So no, he said, where people are hungry and open a poor in spirit, that's when you see the kingdom of God come. So he began to show them what was happening. He took them with him. They were building their relationship. It takes intentional effort. But again, you've got to deal with expectations. Discuss expectations. Your expectation might be, I'll have coffee, I'll pray for this person every day, and I'll have coffee with them once a month. Their expectation might be, they want to move in with you. You've got to talk about, what does this look like? What are you both looking for? How often will you meet? Is your relationship short term or long term? Again, if you think it's long term, start short term. Are there certain areas of life and ministry that they need to grow in it that you can help them with? How, when should you evaluate the relationship? See many spiritual parenting relationships become dysfunctional, even hurtful because of unmet expectations. You want to talk about that up front, at least in most cases, that the Holy Spirit gives you wisdom and guidance. So you want to create an atmosphere of trust and respect and easy to pray, God. Who is it you're calling to walk with me, and then you went to that atmosphere of trust and respect. And I've had, you know, various spiritual sons of my life. Say, hold me accountable with my thought life. And I want to walk impurity in many, many, many different areas of life. This is more caught than taught. Take them with you. I'll give you an example. God has surprises for sometimes I had a phone call, excuse me, from someone from another nation, and said to me, I think I read one of your books, and it's called house to house. You talk about spiritual fathers. I need a spiritual father. I think it's you. Why there's so many people, because I teach them this in the nation's who say, will you be a spiritual father? I simply cannot. I don't have the capacity. So I said, I'm sure this brother was from Canada. And I said, Well, I'm sure there's someone in Canada who to do this. Make a long story short, he was very persistent. A year later, I'm in Canada speaking at a conference. He's there. He says, I'm still looking for a spiritual father. I think it's you. I said, I don't think it's me, and I preach. I love this guy, great guy, but I don't think, I don't think it's me, but he said, Would you pray about it? I said, Sure, because I was sure God would say
no, and when I prayed about it, God said, Yes, this is for me. So I said, Well, look, I get back to I said, door. Said, Yes. I said, but here's what's gonna look at. You have to be clear with expectations. I'll give you my cell phone number. You can come with your wife like sometime next year and spend some time my wife and I, I'll pray for you every day. And I said, I don't have a lot of extra time. You're in another country, but I travel a lot if you want to go with me on trips. He said, I'll go with you. And he's a businessman. He had the means to do that. He was with me in Brazil and with me to Bulgaria, with me to Africa, to Kenya, Africa, and it was a wonderful relationship. He's a wonderful friend of my life today, then God's brought other people in his life to also encourage him, and he said he's encouraged been a follower of so many others, but see, tonight's God has surprises for us. So we initiate the relationship. We build the relationship. It's more caught than taught. It's more like on the job training. You ask lots of questions, things like, if you or me, what would you do differently? Or, how can I how can I help you fulfill the goals you have for five years down the road or 10 years down the road? But then we get to the third key, and that is releasing them to do the same thing. Because true fathering, true discipleship, a true disciple will do what you've done so true disciple also make disciples. So that needs to be part of what we're training. We're encouraging in this. I'm willing to help you, but then I need to know that you will obey the Lord. You'll go do that for another generation. So release them to reproduce Luke 9:1-2. We see how it happened with Jesus in Luke 9:1, when Jesus had called the 12 Together, he gave them power and authority to drive out all demons. Cure diseases, and He sent them out to preach the kingdom of God in the heal the sick. So he gave them authority. Said, now it's your turn. And then verse 10, says, when they return, they reported to Jesus what they had done, there's accountability as they reported back. So people learn by doing you say, you watch me now you do it. I'll watch you. You bring some along, and they'll watch you too. And certainly, very soon, they're doing the same things that you have done. There are so many among us for this call from God. It just need to have somebody take a chance on them and to believe in them and to help them do the same thing we have. We have trained so many people over the years on how to baptize and how to baptize people. Worth it. They lead them to Christ, and we want them to be able to know how to baptize. So we simply, it's very simple. We say, here's how we do it. You come and watch me do it, and then you help me. And then after that process is over, then we'll do somebody else, and I will help you. And then after that I'm going to stand there watching you have somebody else help you, and then you're able to go and they can do the same thing again. It's reproduced. And that applies to any area of life. You're praying for the sick. Take people with you, have them, lay hands on them and pray and see God. God do miracles through you and through them. God practically gives us practical insights on how to be spiritual fathers and spiritual mothers. In the next session,
we're going to get even deeper into the practicality of spiritual parenting.