Video Transcript: The Cry For Spiritual Fathers and Mothers: Chapter 7 Hindrances To Spiritual Fathering
You know, I meet so many people who say I've heard of being a spiritual father mother before, or I've had some of my life. Is supposed to be a spiritual father mother to me. But they were controlling. They were dictatorial. I got really hurt
by them. And I just don't know if I want it. I do want to try again? I'm not sure that this would really work for me. Well, understand that any, everyone has been hurt by somebody somewhere. But still, there's the truth of spiritual parenting. There's natural parenting to natural parents make mistakes. Yes, they do that. Mean we shouldn't be natural parents. Yes, we should. Well, we make some mistakes. We probably will, but see, we're all called to be spiritual parents. And you know, whenever someone makes this kind of mistakes, you know why they make this mistake? Because they the God given us, the manufacturers instructions, is called the Bible. And when we do not live according to the manufacturers instructions, that's when we get in trouble. And that's it. That's when we see people get hurt. But see just because people been a wrong doesn't mean we shouldn't do it. And so Amy people, they say, I don't want to be involved in a house church. I know people, they start a house church. They were dictatorial, or they start a house church. They were just mad at their local church or their pastor. Oh, there's been lots of crazy things that have happened, but God wants you to walk in health and walk in blessing and see house churches establish and house church networks established who love the body of Christ. They love all the church other churches. And we're not trying to do something because they're trying to be different. We're just obeying Jesus and helping people and being spiritual fathers and mothers. So it's really back to the instructions that God gives. He shows us how to live, and when we don't obey the manufacturers instructions, we get in trouble. Now, I'm not a cook. I'm just I'm not my wife will tell you that I remember, we have four children. Our youngest child's Leticia. She was probably about five years of age, and I'll never forget one Saturday morning I was home alone with her, and she said, Daddy, will you make breakfast for me? And I said, Well, sure, let's have cereal. And she said, No, no, no. I mean, like pancakes? Well, I hadn't made pancakes in years. I said, Really, can we just have cereal? She said, No, Daddy, can we have pancakes? Says, okay, she's a cutest little blonde, little blonde hair, blue eyes, sitting on a kitchen table. So I got the pancake mix out and I got some milk and whatever out. I don't remember what it was, but I but somehow I read the instructions wrong, and the concoction I made was really, really bad, and she's watching me, you know? And I said, Honey, this isn't working for daddy. Is it okay if we use a cereal and she's no Daddy, can you try one more time? So I said, Okay, so this time I thought, you know, this is just crazy. I'll try. I'll try again. I tried to follow the instructions again, but somehow it wasn't what. In fact, what happened was this, it caught fire. I mean, our kitchen stove, this pancake caught fire. And I'm taking this, this pan with pancakes, and taken outside, and we had to repaint our kitchen ceiling. It was a bad day, and she's watching this whole
thing. Okay? I'm with cereal. And said, Honey, can we have cereal? She said it was in trouble. One more time. Said, Okay, this time I thought, let's just forget the directions. So I got, you know, all the same stuff out and mixed it in a way I thought was best. And I remember I was there at the kitchen stove, and my kind of flipped it like a chef does. And, I mean, I'm not a chef at all, and somehow it looked like a pancake. So I took this pancake, and placed it on the table, on a plate for her. And I never forget, gave her the little knife and fork. I'll never forget, put a lot of syrup on, just in case, just so you know that. And so she takes a little piece of the pancake, and she puts in her mouth and looks up at me with her big blue eyes, and says, Daddy. She said, Could I could I have cereal? Please? She said, This must be a terrible pancake. Now, what happened? My little girl watched her daddy messed up making pancakes three times because her daddy somehow didn't know how to follow the manufacturer's instructions. And when people don't follow the manufacturer's instructions, it gets messed up. And the same thing is true spiritually. Same thing is true in the church. Same thing is true with being being mentors or coaches or fathers or mothers in the Lord or disciples, or use whatever term you want to use. So I want to give you some examples of what can happen when people do not follow the manufacturers instructions. These are really schemes of the devil. The devil hates, just hates even this whole concept, because he knows the world can be changed, and knows that it will be changed as we become spiritual fathers and mothers to next generation, we start house churches and churches and spiritual families and nurture people. So I'm going to look with you at some of the schemes of the devil. So, for example, what is not believing the past can be redeemed. God is a great Redeemer. I love Romans, 8:28, we know all things, then all things. God works for the good of those who love Him, who've been called according to His purpose. That's who our God is. And he says, Look, I look for what's happened. I can turn this around for good Galatians, 3:13 love this. He's the redeemer in Galatians 3:13 it makes it clear that Jesus became a curse for us. He redeemed us from the curse of the law hanging on a tree becoming a curse for us. See, I grew up in a family of mental illness. I had many family members, uncles and aunts and fathers. In fact, my own father's, now with the Lord, had a short season when he had to go to to a mental hospital for a season. And I, when I came to Christ and and I still was deal with some depression and and my family, some members of the family, tell me, you realize this is in the bloodline, and this is in your in the genes, so to speak, and you might have the same kind of problems in your life. I remember one day I get very depressed. I read this was a curse, but I thought, I'm stuck with this. I was a new believer. I remember the place that happened, and I was getting really discouraged and really depressed, and I thought, Okay, I'm going to go down the same road as my grandfather, my father gone for a bit, my uncles and my aunts. And I remember this scripture, Galatians, 3:13 just came. You know, when I was a new Christian, what I do is I
take a three by five card, I cut in fours, I put a place a scripture on there. Every day, I memorize the Scripture. What I memorized was Galatians 3:13 and realize, no, this is a curse. This mental illness is a curse. And this was hung on the cross 2000 years ago, Jesus Christ took that curse, became a curse for me. So I said in Jesus name devil, you to know that the Bible, my Bible, is true. Jesus Christ became a curse for me. This mental illness hung on the cross 2000 years ago. I'm redeemed from it. I am free from it. My children will be free from it. Next Generation is free, and I am will be free from this moment, from any potential, even a mental illness. You know, that was back that happened back in my early 20s, talking 40 some years ago, that I've never been tempted with mental illness since that time. I never will be. Why? Because this curse was broken. But see, the enemy tries to make it believe that things can't change. Yes, they can. They can change through Jesus Christ. So here's another thing that enemy does. The enemies in the enemy will cause us to to back off and spiritual fathering mother, because it was not passed on to us. You know, the things that other should have passed on we didn't receive from a former generation. We didn't have spiritual fathers. Many of us didn't have spiritual mothers? Well, the word makes it clear that, sure, sure we may not have had that, but it's a new day, and it's a new beginning, and now's the time to see spiritual moms and dads released in this generation. I mean so many spirit dysfunctional, spiritual parents, so many dysfunctional parents. Today I get news for you might say I come from a dysfunctional family. Your heavenly Father is not dysfunctional. You've got to know that your heavenly Father is not dysfunctional. I mean, you've got a new father in heaven. And I said this before, I want to say it again, so I want to make sure you get this a dysfunctional parent will use their children to fulfill their own vision, that happens in churches all the time, but a functional parent will get behind the vision they see in their children. Spiritual children help them do what God's called them to do. And we can break that pattern in Jesus name. You can break it. You can break it in your own nation, your own village, your own country, to be the spiritual father he's called you to be. Here's some other schemes of the devil feeling we must wait till our needs are met. Then we say, well, and I get a spiritual father, and I can be a spiritual father. You know, how could I ever lead other people in the house church? And I haven't had that, that opportunity. Well, there's times we have to start, it's the next generation. We need to start a press Ecclesiastes 11. One says it like this, cast your bread upon the waters. In other words, you become a spiritual father. God will give you spiritual fathers. And I found that was, that was the story of my life. Good for 10 years. I was a I was a pastor, being a spiritual father. Many I didn't have a spiritual father or spiritual mother during this time, but God, by His grace, and gave me spiritual fathers. Some people just don't know their ignorance. They use all know. And I was in Hawaii ministering. And you know, ignorance, by the way, is a curse that robs us of our inheritance. I'm in in Hawaii
ministry at a conference and talk about the need for spiritual fathers and and the need for and people came together in this local church in in Honolulu and said, We need spiritual fathers, and they could lead, you know, house fellowships. And when young man, a young businessman, a long young lawyer, came up to me say, I'm going to do it. Said, God's called to be a spiritual father. I got the revelation. I talked to the main leader, Christian leader of the conference. He said, I know that man. He said, I've tried to get him to lead a House Fellowship for many years. He'd never do it, but he got a revelation. The revelation was, he's called to be a spiritual father. So House Fellowship leaders, house church leaders, are spiritual fathers. Here's another reason that many, many believers never get involved in being spiritual fathers apathy. They're simply wrapped up their own selfish desires, and that's why Revelation 3:19 says it like this, I continually Discipline and Punish everyone I love, so I must punish you, unless you turn from your indifference and become enthusiastic about the things of God. That word enthusiast means to be possessed with God. We should be enthusiastic about the things about, including being spiritual parents to the next generation. Here's another one, insecurity. If we're insecure, we're going to constantly be like, Well, how could God ever use me? I'm afraid I don't know the Bible well enough all those kinds of things. Well, as I mentioned, mentioned in a former lesson. You know, Gideon felt insecure and Moses felt insecure, and Jeremiah felt insecure but God called all them, and he has also called you in the same way, lack of modeling. If no one's model this for you, say, How can I do it? You'll be the model for the next generation. Impatience. Some people say, Well, I can't do this because in pain, because I tried and didn't work. No impatience causes us to quit. We don't see quick results. It's contrary to the scriptural principle of sowing and reaping, you keep sowing. You know, again, I use a farming analogy. I grew up a farmer, a farm boy, and we planted a crop, let's say we plant corn, and if there's a storm and a hail storm and it wipes out, you say, we will never plant corn again. Now that stupid, we go back and plant again. And you might say, I try to mentor somebody. I try to they just try to start a house church of the past. It didn't work. But you come back and do it again the proper way, following the the the instructions, properly according to the Scriptures. You can see great, great blessing. Blessing, release impatience. As I said, Oswald Chamber said it like this, God's not working toward a particular finish. His purpose is the process itself. Say that again, God's not working toward a particular finish. We think, Okay, we got to start a house church, and we got to multiply house church. Yeah, God wants to do that, but that's not the big deal. The big deal is the process he's taking you through as you walk through this journey, you know, there are three stages every vision, there's a honeymoon stage, you get a vision, we're gonna plant a house church, and then there's a testing stage. Like, well, these people said they're gonna join with us, and they didn't join with us. And you know, you're through the testing stage, but those
who continue to believe God in the midst of the trial, in the midst of the test, they're the ones that get the blessing. And then we get to the third stage, the fruitfulness stage, where we find the blessing of God and the grace of God coming. I find another thing that holds people back is fear of mistakes. They feel like, man, you know, what? If I make a mistake, you probably will make some mistakes. And that's just, that's just part of the process, and that's okay. I mentioned before, Jacob walked with a limp and sure he had made some mistakes. You know, God changed his name from deceiver to Israel, prince with God. And God does that, and will do that in our lives. I find that trials and hard times, even as leaders, make us stronger and prepare us for our future. Many hurts from the past. You say, Look, you know, I just You take initiative, you try to be a spiritual father, someone. You plant a house church, and you take a risk, and it both natural and spiritual. Children, as I said before, have the potential to give us great joy or great pain. And there are times that this happens. But you know, the disciples all abandoned Jesus, praise God. He didn't give up. As I said before the Paul's, those he mentored, except Timothy, All seemed to reject Him, for he seemed at least leave him, maybe out of fear, maybe out of persecution, but he continued on and so, so grateful. But probably one of the areas that hinders house church planting, spiritual planting, as much as anything I know is when people have experienced an abuse of authority and they back off. They say, I don't know if I can lead. I've been hurt or I've been abused to wrong spiritual authority. And let me say, like a spiritual fathers and mothers, including house church leaders, Assistant leaders, cannot be dominating authority figures who coerce their spiritual children, those they serve, into obedience or submission. They must be servants who point their spiritual children to Jesus. It has to be building trust. See, church life house. Church life is building trust. Do people trust us? And we have a trust account. You know, if I would have a little jar here, I draw lines on it, they get their trust account. When you make good decisions, you make decisions of integrity, you get your trust account. Being begins to get higher and higher. If you have very little trust account, you start a new church or something. You make a bad decision, people won't trust you. But even if you make a decision, it's necessary good when you have trust in your account, you lose a little trust, but you can build it back up. We need to make sure we have trust in our account. We earn the right to speak into people's lives. They can't just go tell them what to do. We earn the right to do that. Now, my friend Floyd McClung, who wrote the book The Father heart of God, a great classic, he makes these comparisons between dominating fathers and fathers in the Lord. He says it like this, a dominating father will function as if they're the source of guidance for people's lives. For fathers in the Lord, believe that God is a source of guidance. And desire to help other Christians hear His voice. So fathers in the Lord. Say you can hear God. I'm gonna help you to hear from God. Dominating fathers. Emphasize the rights of leaders, dominating father.
Our fathers and Lord emphasize. Their responsibilities of leaders, dominating fathers seek leaders, set them apart, give them special privileges. But fathers in the Lord emphasize the body of Christ serving one another. Dominating fathers seek to control people's actions and lives, but fathers in the Lord encourage people to be dependent on God. See the difference if we want people to be dependent on us, we're dominating fathers. If we want people to really depend on the Lord, then we are releasing fathers and fathers in the Lord, two more dominating fathers emphasize the importance of the leaders ministering to people, but fathers and Lord emphasize the importance of equipping the believers that they can minister to people, and then dominating fathers use rules and laws to control people and force them to conform to a mold. But fathers in the Lord provide an atmosphere of trust and grace to encourage growth in their lives. So may you and I be the spiritual mothers and fathers in this generation who will not be dominating fathers or mothers, but we will run the other direction. We'll run to God. We'll be the fathers and mothers in the Lord that he's called us to be and that will produce healthy, reproducing, Christ filled, Holy Spirit filled, house churches that will reach 1000s in our generation.