Slides: How To Do Your First Meeting

Steve Elzinga

Coaching is not …

Pastoral Care = general care offered by Pastor and/or staff

Counseling = a more professional, specific care offered by Pastor or Counseling staff

Teaching/training/discipling = helping people learn how to do something.

Mentoring = a process of helping someone acquire skills, attitudes, behaviors already mastered by the mentor

Coaching includes …

Caring (like pastoral care) but more about challenge than comfort

Care to a specific need (like counseling) but is more about the future than the past

Teaching/training/discipling but is more about helping the client teach themselves than the coach teaching the client

Mentoring but is less about the client becoming like the mentor and more about the client becoming what he or she could become with a little bit of help

Other thoughts on Coaching:

Coaching is about action, not understanding

Coaching is client directed, not teacher directed

Coaching is not about getting the client to do what the coach wants but what the client wants

Coaching is not about motivating the client; it is helping the client motivate themselves.

Pre-requisites to coaching:

Saving connection to Jesus 

Receive the gift of the Holy Spirit

A walk with God

Part of the Church

Engaged in the 7 Connections

Client has to be willing to take responsibility

Set up appointments

Make all the connections (appointments, phone calls, text, message)

Be on time

Engage in the process

Client has to be willing to make the process a priority

Appointments

Action steps

Client must be willing to pay for the coach's time

Introduce Coaching Models

Introduce the client to the Coaching models matrix

Start without models; use simple questions

Three things coaches do:

Help client figure out what they want to do (decision)

Help client figure out how to do what they want to do (plan)

Help client do what they plan to do (management)

Help client figure out what they want to do (decision)

Where in your life do you think it would be helpful to have a coach? Where in your life are you hurting? Where in your life would you like to see some improvement?

Of all the answers that you came up with to the above questions, which would you like to focus on?

What action goal might come out of this?

Help client figure out how to do what they want to do (plan)

What action steps would you like to take toward reaching your desired goal?

What might be the first step?

Help client do what they plan to do (management)

What action step that you believe will help you move toward your stated goal can hold you accountable for our next meeting?