Reading: Transcript Critical Blame Theory

Henry: So, we're back, and this is an interesting one: Topic six, critical blame theory. I didn't even know there was such a thing. Maybe it's an old theory that we've never heard of before.

Steve: I think it's a study that shouldn't even exist. Right? I don't know if it does. But anyway, I think you're going to relate to this. So, number one, everything relates to somebody owing me something. Two, those with the power are to blame for all the problems I have in life. Interesting, isn't it? No one is at fault and yet everyone is at fault. Current social manifestations include defunding the police, emptying the jails, opening or closing the borders, and debates over more or less government.

Henry: You know, now that I think about it, I do relate to this. If you read the news, it's always "their fault, their fault." We even have an entire industry, the liability insurance industry, that has tried to soften the blow of critical blame theory.

Steve: So, everyone's blaming everyone else. On the one hand, it's not my fault; it's my parents' fault, the school's fault, the government's fault, my teacher's fault, my neighbor's fault, or even God's fault because of the body or DNA I have. On the other hand, if people do something wrong, it’s because they were born that way and can’t help it. We go both ways with this blame thing.

Henry: Genesis 3, "Did God really say that you cannot eat this fruit?" And now God's at fault. And then later, when God confronts them after they have fallen, it’s "the woman!" No, "the serpent tempted us." It's his fault. And ultimately, they try to make the case it's God’s fault, right?

Steve: Ultimately, it comes back to that, whether you believe in God or not. It’s not my fault, right? Where does this blame culture come from? Where does this 'somebody should do it for me' culture come from? That's an interesting question. If there is no God, and no morality based on something higher than ourselves, then all that is left is ME. So what are we saying?

Henry: I interpret that to mean that I just have to think about myself because somehow, everybody else messed with me. Right? So, I'm not going to mess with others.

Steve: Without God and grace, how can I own up to my own faults? With grace, I can face my own failures and take responsibility for my life. So now we're trying to apply critical grace theory to this problem. I think the problem in our culture is, why we have to find blame, is that we have no mechanism to take the blame upon ourselves, right? I mean, if there's no God, no forgiveness, no salvation, and no paying for sins, then my identity is wrapped up with who I am and what I do. And now you want me to take the blame for the lousy things happening? How do I think about myself? I'm already thinking bad about myself, and I have nowhere to go with it other than to conclude that I'm a horrible, lousy, no-good, untalented person, or I can blame my parents, right? Or I can blame the governor, or someone else. But with grace, if I accept that there is such a thing as sin, and I sin, but then there's God forgiving me, in the face of forgiveness, I can now look at my sin because I know that my whole identity is not tied up with my failures. My identity is as a forgiven person, not a total mess-up or worthless human being. I've done some of those things, but my identity is now in Christ, where I've been forgiven. And now I have the strength to actually look at some of my failings.

Henry: Think about Adam and Eve in the garden for the whole blame game. But what did they do? You know, when it's someone else's fault, or we're trying to deflect, that it's not our fault. We hide in the bushes. So God comes in the cool of the day and asks, "Where are you, Adam and Eve?" And then you see...

Steve: They hid from God, when God comes around, but also before that they hid from each other. They couldn't face each other in shame. Right? So sin makes you hide; it doesn't make you put it out on the table. You blame, then hide, blame, then hide, blame, then hide. Well, that's what happens when they hid. When God comes in, He asks, "What happened?" "Well, the woman you gave me..." "The serpent who came here that you created..." You know, the hiding then leads to blame, but none of it fixes anything.

Henry: So let's talk about this theory from a critical blame theory and grace perspective.

Steve: So number one, blame is rooted in human fallenness. Here we talk about without someone taking on the blame, the blame must be placed on someone else, or myself. So what do I do with these problems I have in my life? The mess-ups? I either can blame myself or someone else. Right?

Henry: Well, and you see how when people blame themselves, and we've seen in ministry, you know, we're talking about the ones who blame themselves: depression. "Woe is me. I'm the victim, everybody. You know, I'm horrible." But the fact is, most people put the blame on someone else, but people do blame themselves and go into a tailspin of depression.

Steve: Yes, that's true. Okay, so if we applied critical grace theory, number one, someone must be blamed, and something must be paid.

Henry: Now, that I find interesting. Most people don't really think about that, but if you look at everything in the news media, whenever something happens in politics in Washington, DC, there has to be a scapegoat, right? Someone must be fired, and we don't question it; we just accept that this is how it is. If someone kills another, they go on trial. If found guilty, they're put into jail, right? We don't question why that exists in society; we understand that there is such a thing as atonement, and blame and punishment are part of it. We do it all the time, like when a child is sent to timeout.

Steve: But I think it's there even when we don't see it. For example, when someone needs to be forgiven—let's say you stole $10 from me and I decide to let it go. Who paid? Not you, but I did. I chose to absorb the cost of the $10 you still owe, so someone always pays.

Henry: So I think about credit reports. If you don't pay your credit card bill, you get a fee. If you don't pay the fee, you're reported to the whole world as a bad payer. Ultimately, you might not pay, but the company does, and then they pass it on to all the other customers. Somebody always pays. Nothing goes unpaid.

Steve: Ultimately, maybe you don't have to pay, but the company does, and then they pass it on to all the rest of the people. Somebody always pays. Nothing is ever truly unpaid for.

Henry: Now, I think it's fascinating how this is one of the most pertinent points that drives our humanity and yet is the most ignored.

Steve: Well, when it comes to Christianity, it's like people don't understand that. Why would this concept of atonement—Jesus dying on the cross—make sense? Yet, it makes perfect sense in every other area of our lives.

Henry: Then they'll criticize the Bible. You've heard it, right? "Isn't it child abuse that God the Father sent His Son to pay?" And the reality is, the blood of Jesus is the currency to pay for the deficits we owe. That's a profound act of love. Remember the metaphor from the 1980s about the train going over a trestle and the son of the bridge operator getting caught in the gears? The operator had to make a decision to save the people on the train but sacrificed his own son. Some today might call him a child abuser instead of a hero. It's all about this issue of blame and how we ignore it when it comes to God's love for us. We wonder, "Why does the Bible talk about this? It doesn't make sense."

Steve: So, number two, God steps in with His grace, by sending His Son to die on the cross, to take the blame.

Henry: II Corinthians 5:21 says, "God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God." And Hebrews 9:22 states, "In fact, the law requires that nearly everything be cleansed with blood, and without the shedding of blood, there is no forgiveness."

Steve: Right. This is the very heart of the gospel. The only way out of the blame game is for God to step in and take the blame for us. It might seem odd, but once God takes the blame, we then have the power to own up to our own sins. In other words, it's in the context of being forgiven that I can honestly look at what I've done wrong. It's in the context of grace that you actually find the courage and strength to assess your own faults, instead of passing them onto others.

Henry: We now have new resources to get serious about Christ and personal growth.

Steve: Imagine if the whole world adopted this approach. Everyone would be looking at how they could improve or change something in their life, instead of expecting everyone else to change. What impact would that have on marriages, families, and society?

Henry: Ephesians 4:32 tells us, "Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." So what we're saying here is that the resources by which to love others come because we were loved first. That's a form of currency. That's a payment. So now, it's like our bank account is filled to overflowing with love, and we can now forgive and love others.

Steve: And so, all of a sudden, the blame game comes to an end, right? There's a solution to it. Without God, without salvation, without Jesus dying on the cross, we're stuck in an endless cycle of blame. If I blame you, what are you going to do? You'll blame me back.

Henry: I call it the cycle of self-loathing. We're stuck in this cycle, blaming ourselves or others.

Steve: That's interesting because outward anger is blame, inward anger turns into depression. We don't know where to go with either one.

Henry: So in ministry now, I mean, this is actually crucial. You might be watching and not yet in ministry, maybe you're just a Christian checking out a mini-class. Maybe you're already in ministry. I tell you, this is the core of it all. There is no sermon I've ever written that doesn't touch upon the critical blame theory and the critical grace theory that gives us the answer to this problem. This could be the most important session you've heard on this topic because it almost covers everything.

Steve: That's why if you have people struggling with issues like race, gender, or any of those other things we've discussed, connecting them to Christ might be the first thing you try to do rather than argue those points. Without grace in their life, you're not going to be able to convince them of anything.

Henry: And again, I just go to my own life, your life, my family, thousands of stories that have been submitted. There's always a similar pattern. Many of you were raised as Christians, often walked away, and then blamed everyone, including your parents. At some point, you came to the end of your rope, the end of your resources, and all you could do was receive the grace of God. And once you received that grace, you found a calling, and everything changed. It is the core of the gospel.